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Topic: There's nothing worse than...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Feb 18, 2011 04:38PM)
Than seeing a magician book an illusions show before asking everyone else how to do it.

Your turn.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Feb 18, 2011 08:23PM)
Another thread game started in "Now that's funny!"
Message: Posted by: joseph (Feb 19, 2011 12:30AM)
Not reaching 85 posts per day...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Feb 19, 2011 12:19PM)
Watching another teenager poorly perform a magic trick on YouTube.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Feb 19, 2011 06:21PM)
Having a magician mail you a DVD of his act copied from your show.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Feb 19, 2011 10:24PM)
Seeing your dove peeking out of your tux...
Message: Posted by: Floyd Collins (Feb 19, 2011 10:49PM)
Having Bob Sanders mailing you a DVD of someone copying his act from your show.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Feb 20, 2011 01:00AM)
Buying a magic dvd, then noticing you already have it...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Feb 20, 2011 12:10PM)
Telling everyone to go inside because the wind might blow-over the tent... so the adults go inside leaving you with all the kids, under the tent.

(Yesterday)
Message: Posted by: JRob (Feb 20, 2011 02:37PM)
Watching some twit open his latest package from online magic store.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Feb 20, 2011 09:20PM)
Learning that the rubber chicken you vanished was real.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Feb 20, 2011 10:10PM)
Realizing that the check you got for your last show was hot.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Feb 21, 2011 08:28AM)
Knowing that the problem with democracy is that someone always gets elected.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Feb 21, 2011 01:23PM)
Finding someone in your store at 8-am.... who bought a set of lock picks the day before.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Feb 22, 2011 08:02AM)
Performing your Doves to Rabbit and finding the rabbit is missing.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Feb 22, 2011 01:13PM)
Having someone. who's wearing leather shoes and belt and carrying a leather purse, lecture you about the ethical treatment of animals
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Feb 22, 2011 08:12PM)
Finding that your pull is unattached!
Message: Posted by: joseph (Feb 26, 2011 07:56AM)
Doing your best performance on national tv with your fly open...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Feb 26, 2011 01:24PM)
Telling everyone to go inside because the tent is about ready to blow over - so - all the adults go inside and leave you under the tent with 30 kids.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Feb 26, 2011 03:20PM)
Trying to explain to two cops with drawn guns that you are trying to pick the lock to your own house at 2 AM.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Feb 26, 2011 04:45PM)
Doing gospel magic for Tom Cruise and John Travolta...
Message: Posted by: Bill Hoffman (Feb 26, 2011 04:52PM)
Being asked to make a wife disappear.


ps.. The post right above mine is all kinds of great!
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Feb 27, 2011 09:08PM)
Being told that you're hired - only because- the jumper doesn't fit in their living room... and your less expensive, too.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Feb 27, 2011 09:50PM)
Having Charlie Sheen as your character witness.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Feb 28, 2011 06:41AM)
Showing Dolly Parton a card trick at waist level...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Feb 28, 2011 10:53AM)
Getting caught faking sincerity.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Feb 28, 2011 01:04PM)
I believe you. You believe me. right?
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Feb 28, 2011 09:45PM)
Producing the right card early for your NEXT Trick!
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Feb 28, 2011 11:20PM)
Having a memory lapse in the middle of a memory routine.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 1, 2011 01:41PM)
Getting one behind in a one-ahead routine.
Message: Posted by: Wravyn (Mar 1, 2011 03:14PM)
Getting hit with a sudden urge to use the restroom when the MC is introducing you.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Mar 1, 2011 09:04PM)
Putting slush powder instead of sugar in your coffee...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Mar 2, 2011 01:25PM)
Waiting for Dynamike to join the fun
Message: Posted by: joseph (Mar 2, 2011 03:48PM)
Putting your sixth finger away, and still counting six...
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Mar 2, 2011 06:36PM)
Noticing that your proctologist is wearing a thumb tip.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Mar 2, 2011 07:43PM)
[quote]
On 2011-03-02 18:36, hbwolkov wrote:
Noticing that your proctologist is wearing a thumb tip.
[/quote]
Actually it's a D'light....
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Mar 2, 2011 11:06PM)
Better a D'light than a delight.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 3, 2011 08:18AM)
Finishing your escape act to learn that you have locked your car keys in the car trunk.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Mar 3, 2011 12:27PM)
Earning less then your assistants on a 4wall.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Mar 3, 2011 12:38PM)
A trigger happy magician performing Russian Roulette
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 3, 2011 01:59PM)
Having a vet in the audience notice that your rabbit is rabid.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Mar 3, 2011 02:26PM)
Poking a spectator with your magic wand
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 3, 2011 05:37PM)
Changing tires just to find that your spare is flat too.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Mar 3, 2011 05:54PM)
Mixing up a tube of tooth paste with a tube of Preporation H.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 3, 2011 08:19PM)
Going to the cleaners before the show to get out your tux you left at home.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Mar 4, 2011 12:49PM)
Producing a ball from behind a guys ear and having him accuse you of stealing one of his balls... loudly.
Message: Posted by: jazzy snazzy (Mar 4, 2011 02:05PM)
[quote]
On 2011-03-03 17:54, hbwolkov wrote:
Mixing up a tube of tooth paste with a tube of Preporation H.
[/quote]
or Visene with Krazy Glue
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 5, 2011 05:35AM)
Choosing a volunteer from the audience that was at last night's show.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Mar 5, 2011 07:09AM)
Finding a normal coin in your pocket...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 6, 2011 01:14AM)
Hearing the coin fall from the shell prematurely.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Mar 6, 2011 02:39AM)
Discovering that your cat has been walking on your keyboard and sending cancelation Emails to upcoming events.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Mar 6, 2011 07:40AM)
Mistaking your bang gun for the real thing...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Mar 6, 2011 04:30PM)
Posting every other person to keep this thread alive.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 6, 2011 07:16PM)
Half way through the show realizing that your doves are still in the car.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Mar 7, 2011 01:15PM)
As it says on the main page of this category "There is nothing worse than...(Jay Leslie), but then there isn't much better either."
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 7, 2011 10:28PM)
There is nothing worse than a "weightless" Chinese stick.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Mar 8, 2011 12:18AM)
Than doing a card trick when you don't actually know one.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 9, 2011 09:53AM)
Giving deadbeats a "Tax Credit" for taxes they don't pay.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Mar 9, 2011 01:48PM)
Forgetting your force card.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Mar 9, 2011 08:16PM)
Seeing a one year old eating a Gerbers bisquit and playing with your fanning deck...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 9, 2011 09:39PM)
Cats sitting on stage waiting for your dove productions.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Mar 13, 2011 08:28AM)
Finding grape juice in your chop cup...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 13, 2011 05:43PM)
Looking out into the audience and recognizing them all from seeing their shows.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Mar 14, 2011 12:35AM)
A momentary lapse during Russian Roulette
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 14, 2011 05:39AM)
Watching someone else do your routine.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Mar 15, 2011 01:12PM)
Your dog eating 14 sets of Marshall Sleevers... 20 minutes before leaving for a show.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Mar 16, 2011 06:20AM)
Drinking down a nice glass of Moo milk by mistake...
Message: Posted by: MagicB1S (Mar 16, 2011 08:58PM)
Thinking you have invented a trick to find out it is already in production (jay Leslie I will pm you)
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 17, 2011 10:30AM)
Being asked, "Why are you doing magic?"
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Mar 17, 2011 03:47PM)
Being asked what is it you think, you're doing?
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Mar 18, 2011 11:55PM)
Than a magician too pooped to magish.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Mar 19, 2011 10:21AM)
Taking a blue deck out of a red box...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Mar 21, 2011 01:37PM)
Showing up to a gig to see they hired someone else because they couldn't get you on the phone two hours earlier - (when you were at another party)
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 21, 2011 10:40PM)
Doing MisMade Flag in the wrong order.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Mar 22, 2011 09:48PM)
Than a magician whose entire training came from you tube.
Message: Posted by: MagicB1S (Mar 23, 2011 01:26PM)
Being Three pages into this thread and still no sign of DynaMike
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Mar 23, 2011 04:09PM)
Having to read everyone else's posts to be informed of Dynamikes whereabouts.
Message: Posted by: MagicB1S (Mar 23, 2011 08:55PM)
60 degrees last week and 10 inches of snow this week... I thought the calender said it was spring
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Mar 24, 2011 01:45PM)
Finding out that your Spring Snake and your Rocky Racoon had a baby which you call WeinerRacoonSpringSnakeThingamagig.

And you can't decide to build a special snake basket or have it climb up your leg... and your arm... and your neck
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 25, 2011 01:12PM)
Putting you hand in your pocket for your loaded TT just to find that it is loaded with the WRONG thing!
Message: Posted by: joseph (Mar 26, 2011 07:40AM)
Doing your fire eating act at the dynamite factory...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 27, 2011 07:42AM)
Finding that your change bag really is empty!
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Mar 27, 2011 01:23PM)
Having a heart attack and the kids are still asking for their balloons,
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 28, 2011 10:04AM)
Doing card magic for the blind.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Mar 28, 2011 03:58PM)
Performing free for the 'exposure'...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 29, 2011 11:22PM)
Doing a color change with the same color silk.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Apr 2, 2011 07:01AM)
Using a cigarette pull with short sleeves...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 2, 2011 04:19PM)
Getting out on stage and learning that you gave the techs the wrong music.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Apr 2, 2011 06:29PM)
Realising what the first three letters in assistant, stand for.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Apr 3, 2011 07:34AM)
Setting the wrong $100 bill on fire...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 3, 2011 06:52PM)
Your whole stage show is being shown from overhead with a zoom lens.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Apr 7, 2011 07:17PM)
People saying "If you were really a magician you could load all that stuff in your car by magic".
Message: Posted by: joseph (Apr 7, 2011 10:28PM)
Going to a 4 day magic convention with your kids...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 8, 2011 09:28AM)
Learning that free fundraiser show you agreed to do is for the most controversial group alienating customers in your market.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Apr 8, 2011 04:17PM)
Sitting here and waiting for the internet to ring.
Message: Posted by: francisngkl (Apr 9, 2011 12:30AM)
Going for a dinner with your girlfriend and end up having to share a table with your wife and her boyfriend.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Apr 9, 2011 07:34AM)
Letting a thief examine your 4 $100 bills...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 10, 2011 06:18PM)
There is nothing worse than buying a Square circle with a red load chamber.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Apr 11, 2011 04:45PM)
Then doing close-up while the disk jockey cranks-up the volume
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 11, 2011 08:59PM)
A wand nobody can see.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Apr 12, 2011 02:13PM)
Birds and outdoor shows over 100 degrees while...

Waiting for the host to conclude his opening.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 12, 2011 02:50PM)
Election day and no qualified candidates.
Message: Posted by: francisngkl (Apr 13, 2011 09:59AM)
Being such a successful as a magician that your newly-wed only want to see your magic tricks in your wedding night...then the night after.. then the night after... then...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Apr 13, 2011 12:30PM)
Coming to this forum for political advice
Message: Posted by: francisngkl (Apr 13, 2011 12:33PM)
By sheer magic you can perform without practice
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Apr 13, 2011 01:12PM)
Caller ID ruining all your phony phone calls.
Message: Posted by: francisngkl (Apr 13, 2011 10:26PM)
Farting loudly in a performance
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Apr 14, 2011 03:27PM)
[quote]
On 2011-04-13 22:26, francisngkl wrote:
Farting loudly in a performance
[/quote]

Where exactly do you aim your microphone?
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Apr 14, 2011 10:26PM)
A sharply pointed wand.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 15, 2011 06:48PM)
Learning that you have introduced two shell coins and no inserts.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Apr 16, 2011 07:00AM)
Doing your indoor shadow routine during a power failure...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 17, 2011 07:22PM)
Knowing that everyone in your audience is a better magician than you are.
Message: Posted by: francisngkl (Apr 18, 2011 04:59AM)
Having the taxman watching you in your performance
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 18, 2011 08:09AM)
Having to listen to a President who flew a huge jet cross-country at my expense to lecture me on green fuels! (Just email me a video!)
Message: Posted by: joseph (Apr 23, 2011 04:19PM)
Doing a mind reading act for an audience of psychics...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 23, 2011 10:21PM)
Learning that you just bought the old (unimproved) version of the trick at twice the price of the newer better version.
Message: Posted by: francisngkl (Apr 23, 2011 10:23PM)
Sharing trick secrets with children
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Apr 24, 2011 12:06AM)
People Googling your tricks in the middle of the performance
Message: Posted by: joseph (Apr 24, 2011 07:21AM)
Practicing a coin roll with a jumbo half...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Apr 24, 2011 07:10PM)
Listening you your GF tell people how things work, while you're performing.
Message: Posted by: francisngkl (Apr 24, 2011 10:37PM)
Performing cups and balls in front of Dai Vernon
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Apr 25, 2011 12:21PM)
A small child, a deck of cards, and an exacto knife.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 27, 2011 07:57AM)
Doing a double lift in Two Card Monte.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Apr 30, 2011 06:43AM)
Having a layman show everyone the 21 card trick in the middle of your show...
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (May 1, 2011 07:10PM)
Inviting someone on stage and not realizing they were completely deaf and had an expressive aphasia.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (May 2, 2011 08:38PM)
Having a PETA person yell at you - only to point out they are wearing leather shoes.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (May 3, 2011 09:13AM)
Learning that IT really is!
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (May 3, 2011 12:22PM)
Getting half way through a routine before you realize you left the gimmick at home.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (May 5, 2011 01:19PM)
Driving half way to a show before realising you don't have the contact information.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (May 5, 2011 04:30PM)
Being aked to perform at the American Association of Hecklers Annual Meeting.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (May 5, 2011 09:36PM)
Learning that both you and the worlds best magician are in the same room.... at the same time.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (May 6, 2011 04:27PM)
Wearing loafers when you had planned to perform a shoelace tie.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (May 11, 2011 07:38PM)
Doing a comedy routine for accountants.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (May 13, 2011 04:32PM)
Transparent cups and balls.
Message: Posted by: joseph (May 14, 2011 05:53AM)
Having to 'go' right before your show...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (May 14, 2011 07:42PM)
Seeing your doves perched up high on the speaker cables.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (May 15, 2011 04:47PM)
Being told there ar going to be 30 people inside and there are 300 outside.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (May 15, 2011 04:50PM)
Being told that your stage show has been moved from the theater to the ballroom with the "stage" a marked off area on the flat floor.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (May 22, 2011 10:25AM)
A pyromaniac stage performer at a childs birthday party
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (May 22, 2011 09:38PM)
Your "stage" is the tailgate of a delivery truck.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (May 23, 2011 03:18PM)
An audience full of people with dead hearing aid batteries
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (May 23, 2011 03:46PM)
How do you know it's a hot day?

Realising that the soda in the trunk of your car for a week is colder then sodas the customer put on the counter.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (May 23, 2011 06:23PM)
Discovering too late that the heckler in the front row is the cheif accountant for the IRS.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (May 27, 2011 04:07PM)
Doing a great bill switch just to find out that the new one is worthless too.
Message: Posted by: TheStoner (May 29, 2011 04:44AM)
Dropping a one way force deck
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (May 29, 2011 07:02PM)
[quote]
On 2011-04-24 22:37, francisngkl wrote:
Performing cups and balls in front of Dai Vernon
[/quote]

Cleaning the shelve Dai is resting on and hearing people yell " Move the vacuum cleaner away from the box".

(As once happened to yours personally)
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (May 30, 2011 12:38AM)
An extra small thumb tip on an extra large thumb.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (May 30, 2011 05:09PM)
Having someone sign a card in a one way forcing deck.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (May 30, 2011 09:19PM)
Doing torn and restored when you realize you didn't have a restored.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (May 30, 2011 09:47PM)
There's nothing worse than trying to play in Texas without a fiddle in the band.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (May 30, 2011 11:15PM)
There's nothing worse than trying to open a restaurant in El Paso that doesn't serve Mexican food.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jun 1, 2011 07:29PM)
There's nothing worse than a new set of Proline rings and a child with a horseshoe set.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jun 3, 2011 09:47PM)
Than having a dozen 13year old YouTube fanatics sitting in the front row of your show.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jun 4, 2011 07:44AM)
Practicing with flash paper in the shower...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jun 4, 2011 01:27PM)
Finding yourself in an outhouse with nothing but flash paper.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jun 4, 2011 06:39PM)
Getting hiccups at the beginning of a set.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jun 5, 2011 07:10AM)
Leaving the keys to your underground escape at home...
Message: Posted by: SimonG-97 (Jun 5, 2011 07:19AM)
That time a seagull comes down and steals your long rope for Professors Nightmare.
Message: Posted by: SimonG-97 (Jun 5, 2011 07:20AM)
When you lock a spectator in your thumb cuffs to check their real, then realise you left the keys at home...........
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jun 5, 2011 03:27PM)
Done that
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jun 6, 2011 12:52PM)
Forgetting most of your props at home and realizing you are not Max Mavin and you can't gracefully perform.
Message: Posted by: SimonG-97 (Jun 7, 2011 11:50AM)
Shining your head then realising your not Max Maven
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jun 7, 2011 05:57PM)
Begging them NOT to feed the kids large quantities of cake and candy immediately before the show, then having the birthday boy vomit on your shoes.
Message: Posted by: Max Krause (Jun 7, 2011 06:10PM)
Racing to get to your gig only to find they sent you an email that was caught by your spam folder which explained that the date had been changed to a day you had already booked another show on.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jun 7, 2011 08:22PM)
Getting laryngitis 2 days before before a big gig and being a lousy mime.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jun 10, 2011 10:17PM)
Showing up a week early and excusing yourself by saying, you wanted to see if all your equipment would fit.

And you do close-up.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jun 11, 2011 06:53AM)
Putting your doves in the cage with your tigers...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jun 13, 2011 06:57AM)
Listening to imaginary business advice from a socialist.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jun 27, 2011 06:00PM)
Getting a 50 dollar tip from someone who doesn't mention it
followed, by, a few hours later,

Getting handed a whopping 5 dollar tip and the customer acts like they're doing you a big favour.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jul 1, 2011 03:14PM)
Jay, in my mind there is nothing better than a 5 or 50 dollar tip.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jul 3, 2011 06:15PM)
Magic conventions that schedule 11Pm Lectures and 9 Am events.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jul 4, 2011 07:17AM)
A magic convention just 100 yards from a too small restroom.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jul 4, 2011 12:28PM)
Standing in front of a coke machine, thirsty, and only a pocket full of gimmicked coins.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jul 5, 2011 06:06AM)
Proposing with a Himber ring...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jul 5, 2011 06:05PM)
Arriving at a venue to find that the only mic is handheld.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jul 6, 2011 07:03AM)
Tap your pockets, and break the 2 eggs in them...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jul 8, 2011 06:29AM)
Finding that you are following the act that copied yours.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jul 8, 2011 03:17PM)
Coin magic if you have two left hands.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jul 9, 2011 07:15PM)
Having an election and someone gets elected.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jul 10, 2011 01:00AM)
A dove with psittacosis.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jul 10, 2011 06:42AM)
Doing strolling magic at a Hells Angels convention...
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jul 10, 2011 01:46PM)
A top hat 4 sizes too big and a tuxedo 4 sizes too small.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jul 11, 2011 06:06PM)
Having others know that you voted for the loser who won.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jul 18, 2011 11:28PM)
Coming home from a magic convention and realizing that you maxed out all your credit cards in the dealers room.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jul 19, 2011 06:04PM)
There is nothing worse than coming home from a magic convention!
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jul 20, 2011 01:07AM)
There's nothing worse than trying to figure out why every two weeks somebody gets your credit card number and starts using it in California or Michigan, even when you haven't used it after they change it.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jul 20, 2011 04:49AM)
There is nothing worse than an over-cooked grilled cheese sandwich. (Perhaps that is a carbon sandwich?)
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jul 20, 2011 03:15PM)
Than realizing that you just sat on your over-cooked grilled cheese sandwich.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jul 20, 2011 08:52PM)
Goggling the weather for the city you're travelling to - and reading:

Temperature 106... but with the wind-chill factor it feels like 104.... :eek:
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jul 20, 2011 11:45PM)
Reading 7 pages of "there's nothing worse than..." and getting only weather reports.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jul 21, 2011 06:52AM)
Doing the multiplying ice cubes in the heat wave...
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jul 22, 2011 07:00PM)
Being asked to juggle 20 pound cannonballs
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jul 22, 2011 11:43PM)
Having to do an outdoor show (in this heat) with doves everywhere.

And the MC won't stop talking.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jul 23, 2011 01:37AM)
An incontinent dove
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jul 23, 2011 06:22AM)
Having your vent doll make fun of you...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jul 26, 2011 04:03PM)
Having your GPS stolen (between shows)- not having a map book -and - the customer has their cell phone in their purse where they can't hear it.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jul 29, 2011 01:59AM)
A dove with narcolepsy.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jul 30, 2011 02:22PM)
Having a Eureka table base with stripped out threads.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jul 30, 2011 06:38PM)
Being confused with the masked magician.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jul 30, 2011 06:39PM)
Bending over on stage and being accused of being a plumber.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jul 30, 2011 10:55PM)
Having people ask if you build your props in India
Message: Posted by: windrunner (Jul 31, 2011 07:03AM)
Finding out the the kids at your birthday party show are smarter than congress
Message: Posted by: windrunner (Jul 31, 2011 07:04AM)
Having a kid walk in to the first day of magic camp waring a Top Hat and Cape
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jul 31, 2011 07:41AM)
Having a vent doll that stutters...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jul 31, 2011 04:05PM)
Having a vent figure that you blow-up.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jul 31, 2011 09:01PM)
Being introduced as a friend of the Masked Magician.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jul 31, 2011 09:37PM)
Having someone try to sell you a rip off of your own trick.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Aug 2, 2011 04:58PM)
Amen

Having other magicians question why you strangle rabbits?... while smiling.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Aug 3, 2011 06:12AM)
Pulling only the rabbits ears out of your top hat...
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Aug 3, 2011 05:32PM)
A prolonged power outage when performing in a big auditorium.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Aug 4, 2011 02:43PM)
ANY power outage for a stage show.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Aug 4, 2011 07:56PM)
A heckler with funnier lines than you.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Aug 6, 2011 06:26AM)
Being scared to place your own arm in your Disecto...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Aug 6, 2011 09:36PM)
Someone pretending to be a leader without a plan.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Aug 7, 2011 01:36PM)
A Mind Reading goose with a mind of his own.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Aug 9, 2011 06:16PM)
Tying a knot that really holds!
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Aug 9, 2011 07:07PM)
Gearing-up for Magic Live.... fool well knowing that after 7 hours in the booth each day you will call it Magic Dead.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Aug 9, 2011 11:41PM)
An hour performance with an open zipper.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Aug 10, 2011 03:07PM)
Having other magicians ask "Do you like MY routine (which makes no sense).

And that's exactly why I never ask them either.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Aug 10, 2011 07:46PM)
Discovering last minute that you substitute assistant exceeds the weight limit for everything but an industrial levitation.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Aug 13, 2011 02:19PM)
Seeing that this entire section is getting less and less funny posts (even if they're all political)
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Aug 16, 2011 10:12PM)
Knowing that a wheel is missing from your roll-on table.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Aug 20, 2011 07:53PM)
Coming back from Magic Live with more stories than magic.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Aug 21, 2011 07:22PM)
Getting to the show and then realizing that the load pan to your dove pan is still in the dishwasher at home.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Aug 23, 2011 01:37PM)
Having all the electrical wires in your sound system get a short at the same time
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Aug 25, 2011 12:11AM)
Having the fire alarm go off in the building during your show.
Message: Posted by: makeupguy (Aug 26, 2011 12:10AM)
Being upstaged by a drunk falling off his barstool before your show and bleeding all over the floor. the EMT's take 20 min to get there.. in the middle of your first set.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Aug 27, 2011 11:34AM)
Taking investment advice from a Socialist.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Aug 27, 2011 05:27PM)
Trying to entertain while the lights are low, the music is loud and every 20 feet a pole-dancer is gyrating,

But I still got paid with a healthy gratutity
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Aug 30, 2011 09:06PM)
Finding an empty thumb tip.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Aug 31, 2011 11:50PM)
Handing a mismatched $100 to an angry obsessive-compulsive undercover federal agent.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Sep 1, 2011 10:13PM)
Playing Three card Monte with two cards.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Sep 3, 2011 01:17AM)
A near sighted William Tell.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Sep 3, 2011 01:18PM)
Remembering the ending but not the middle of the routine.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Sep 3, 2011 02:02PM)
A far sighted microbiologist.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Sep 3, 2011 03:01PM)
Pulling a loop that you find is attached to NOTHING!
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Sep 4, 2011 03:17PM)
A clown without a squeeker, horn or balloons
Message: Posted by: DavidG (Sep 6, 2011 04:20AM)
Watching your daughter using your clipboard for a REAL picture...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Sep 8, 2011 08:19AM)
Seeing you cat with dove feathers on his face.
Message: Posted by: DavidG (Sep 9, 2011 02:20PM)
[quote]
On 2011-09-08 08:19, Bob Sanders wrote:
Seeing you cat with dove feathers on his face.
[/quote]

NOT seeing your cat with dove feathers on his face. Actually, not seeing anything anymore...
Message: Posted by: mpicard (Sep 9, 2011 02:49PM)
Pulling out a regular deck when it is supposed to be an invisible deck. (last week)
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Sep 9, 2011 03:30PM)
Finding out that your spectator for mind reading is mute.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 7, 2011 07:33PM)
Planning to do the same show three times at the park today and finding out that you get exactly the same audience for all three shows.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Nov 8, 2011 01:20PM)
Having the same kids assist on the same tricks three shows in a row.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Nov 9, 2011 10:46PM)
There is nothing worse than dressing up on Halloween as a priest and having all your friends mistake you for Father Photius.

(Where are you hiding, I miss you posts)
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Nov 10, 2011 12:53PM)
There is nothing worse then seeing your thread only make it to 9 pages
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Nov 11, 2011 06:57AM)
There is nothing worse than Jay starting this boring thread.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 11, 2011 07:58AM)
Doing a billiard ball routine and hearing a shell hit the floor.
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Nov 11, 2011 11:15AM)
Having a dove fly around pooping on the audience.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Nov 11, 2011 06:16PM)
[quote]
On 2011-11-11 06:57, Dynamike wrote:
There is nothing worse than Jay starting this boring thread.
[/quote]
Nothing worse then someone who knows the thread is boring..... yet continues to post.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 12, 2011 06:50AM)
Than trying to write with a spider pen...
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Nov 12, 2011 02:10PM)
Being unable to tolerate the elderly women's strong perfume who sitting in the front row
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 14, 2011 11:20AM)
Posting when you have nothing to say.
Message: Posted by: dkarahan (Nov 22, 2011 08:27PM)
Having a totally different result from a psi-calculator
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 23, 2011 05:22PM)
A lecture series that only covers mental magic, cards and children's magic.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Nov 23, 2011 10:19PM)
People pulling your legs apart because they think you're a turkey.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 23, 2011 10:34PM)
Arriving at the venue to do magic and finding that the microphone is handheld.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 24, 2011 10:57AM)
Discovering your magicians wax melted on your card index...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Nov 24, 2011 02:15PM)
Then some kid just drank your OOM.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Nov 25, 2011 12:34AM)
Then a 4 year old in the front row with a slingshot or blow gun.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 25, 2011 10:15AM)
A suicidal magic wand that keeps jumping to the floor.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Nov 27, 2011 01:09AM)
The magician before you performs 25% of your routine.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Nov 27, 2011 12:01PM)
Explaining, in detail, the answer to a persons question only for them to say.. I changed my mind - that wasn't it.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 27, 2011 05:56PM)
Having every magician in the show using the same music.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Nov 27, 2011 11:56PM)
Doing Q & A and having the responses sound like a seen from Monty Pythons and the Holy Grail.....Red no blue ummmm
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 28, 2011 06:18PM)
Tying a false knot that keeps falling out.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Dec 5, 2011 11:16AM)
Opening a box of cards to just find it is a normal deck.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Dec 5, 2011 04:32PM)
Avoiding all work and posting instead.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Dec 5, 2011 10:59PM)
A change bag that doesn't!
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Dec 5, 2011 11:47PM)
A psychiatrist change bag that is happy the way it is.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Dec 7, 2011 08:06PM)
A magnetic coin that comes back out of your pocket stuck to the metal button on your coat sleeve.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Dec 7, 2011 08:23PM)
A room full of psychopaths with long knives.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Dec 8, 2011 09:00AM)
Doing color changes for a room full of color blind guys.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Dec 17, 2011 04:26PM)
Answering a question in a nursing home show with "Depends".
Message: Posted by: joseph (Dec 18, 2011 07:03AM)
Having to order another 5 lb. bag of woofle dust...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Dec 19, 2011 10:57AM)
Owning fireproof woofle dust.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 20, 2011 11:08PM)
Than discovering that in the front row of your audience are men holding buckets of tar and a rope.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Dec 21, 2011 06:17AM)
Using the baby's bib for a close up mat..
or it's diaper...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Dec 24, 2011 10:08AM)
Noticing that your force card is face up on the floor.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Dec 25, 2011 12:02AM)
Serving your Mind Reading Goose for Christmas.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Dec 26, 2011 08:03PM)
Finding that your TT is already full!
Message: Posted by: joseph (Dec 27, 2011 09:33AM)
Using roughing powder on warts...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Dec 30, 2011 10:22AM)
Lending money to an irresponsible government.
Message: Posted by: HighClass (Dec 30, 2011 03:34PM)
Hearing the second gong on the Gong show.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Dec 31, 2011 06:18AM)
Dropping your thumb tip in the emergency room...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jan 1, 2012 06:55PM)
Realizing that your Hopping Half just got tossed in the bucket at the toll booth.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 2, 2012 04:29PM)
Being on a six month tour and discovering your assistant can't fit in the box because she's prego.:fear:
Message: Posted by: braabesflaben (Jan 3, 2012 08:58PM)
Stepping in a puddle with your sock
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 4, 2012 02:17PM)
Not being the last one, to post.
Message: Posted by: braabesflaben (Jan 4, 2012 05:13PM)
Finding out that your rabbit, that was supposed to go into the hat, did his own multiplying routine.
Message: Posted by: BJ Almond (Jan 4, 2012 11:52PM)
Going to grab a coin from your pocket and finding a hole in your pocket so large you can't call it a "pocket" anymore. It's a tunnel.

Then realising that your coin, two gimmicked decks and silks must all be sitting on the car seat, or on the floor of your house where you got dressed.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jan 5, 2012 12:38AM)
Screwing up a punch line that you have used over a hundred times.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jan 5, 2012 09:00AM)
Dealing with a quota law professor who doesn't know the law.
Message: Posted by: braabesflaben (Jan 5, 2012 11:26AM)
That glazed-over look some spectators have
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jan 5, 2012 01:31PM)
Finding your dove loop just fine to learn that it is untied!
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jan 5, 2012 10:52PM)
An overweight magician doing karate moves on stage...
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jan 6, 2012 12:16AM)
A magic wand with three ends
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jan 6, 2012 05:55PM)
An audience that came to the show because it needed the sleep.
Message: Posted by: braabesflaben (Jan 6, 2012 07:40PM)
Having an itch, that you can't scratch for the next 4 hours
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jan 6, 2012 09:18PM)
A soft voice and a hard of hearing audience.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jan 6, 2012 09:48PM)
Knowing the your rope shears won't cut butter.
Message: Posted by: braabesflaben (Jan 6, 2012 10:34PM)
Someone who thinks "sims"alabim is an extended version of the sims
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jan 7, 2012 05:51AM)
Running out of woofle dust ...
Message: Posted by: braabesflaben (Jan 7, 2012 10:02AM)
During a chop cup routine with three cups, forgetting which one is the chop cup
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jan 7, 2012 10:24AM)
Looking down to see a magnetic coin stuck to your coat button.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jan 8, 2012 06:43PM)
Discovering half you audience was at last nights comedy magic performance at a different venue
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jan 9, 2012 08:05AM)
Finding that the puppy has chewed all of your balloons.
Message: Posted by: braabesflaben (Jan 9, 2012 07:48PM)
Buying tricks that you can't perform while wearing gloves for a show where you have to wear gloves.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jan 9, 2012 10:54PM)
Having to do Miser's Dream with IOUs.
Message: Posted by: braabesflaben (Jan 10, 2012 12:30PM)
Not having a final load for your cups and balls, because you couldn't afford anything else to eat.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 10, 2012 01:20PM)
Seeing the birthday boy appear from his room, with his linking rings, to show everyone how they work.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jan 10, 2012 11:48PM)
Going to a restaurant in Beijing that features rat cooked 101 ways and discovering it was not a joke.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jan 14, 2012 07:45AM)
Getting a 'Magic for Dummies' book for Xmas...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jan 14, 2012 04:19PM)
Coming back from a magic convention and realizing that you simply bought more of the stuff you already had.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jan 14, 2012 09:15PM)
Having 500 new business cards printed with your name spelled wrong.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jan 15, 2012 07:34AM)
Doing a strolling gambling demo in a casino...
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jan 15, 2012 03:35PM)
Size 30 pants and a 36 inch waist.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jan 16, 2012 05:46AM)
Being accused of cheating during your gambling demo...
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jan 16, 2012 11:00AM)
A comedic mortician.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 18, 2012 02:51PM)
All your batteries going dead as your being introduced.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jan 18, 2012 11:03PM)
Performing at half time at Candle Stick Park and having a power failure.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jan 19, 2012 04:11PM)
Correctly printed labels with bad adheasive.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 19, 2012 04:13PM)
Having to think-up nonsensical jokes, for no good reason.
Message: Posted by: braabesflaben (Jan 19, 2012 05:41PM)
Kids like your cheapest tricks better than the expensive one.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jan 20, 2012 06:38PM)
Going to Best Buy with the expectation of purchasing a new 8 track player.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jan 21, 2012 06:51AM)
Than an aging hippie doing a magic show...
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jan 22, 2012 01:05PM)
Finding a cheap hotel room online that turns out to be a room in the State Insane Asylum.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 22, 2012 08:08PM)
Waiting an extra hour to start because they said "I'll take care of you" but that really meant, giving you a sandwich... to go.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jan 25, 2012 08:35PM)
Finding that one bug bomb is not enough to give you solo occupancy of your hotel room.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jan 28, 2012 10:43AM)
Hearing the check is in the mail for the tenth consecutive week.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 28, 2012 03:52PM)
Hanging out at your favourite bar before someone tells you to pull up your zipper.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jan 28, 2012 07:03PM)
Having the MC for the night as the only guy there that could not lead a silent prayer?
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jan 28, 2012 07:23PM)
Having a inebriated MC who feels the need to circulate channeling the Masked Magician.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 28, 2012 08:41PM)
Ripping the mask off the Masked Magician and looking in the mirror to see - it's you.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jan 28, 2012 10:21PM)
Getting that close to the mm...
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jan 29, 2012 12:16AM)
Being upstaged by a ten year old "well seasoned" magician at an IBM meeting
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jan 29, 2012 09:45PM)
Finding that the IRS will be your next audience.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jan 29, 2012 11:39PM)
Discovering your wife's midnight snacks were at your neighbors house for the last 3 weeks according to the GPS on her iPhone.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 30, 2012 02:42PM)
Seeing that the host hired two other close-up workers and you all have the same tricks.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Jan 30, 2012 11:40PM)
A $10,000 sound system which uses $2.00 speakers
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Feb 3, 2012 05:58PM)
Or- you take your Sennheiser ME66/K6 - Super-Cardioid Mic Capsule with K6... because the DJ insisted you use his brand new system
and it was a ninety dollar Music-Man karaoke deal in a box.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Feb 3, 2012 09:59PM)
Expert advice from someone who never saw the trick.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Feb 3, 2012 10:25PM)
Too much advice from too many experts.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Feb 4, 2012 06:49AM)
Someone snatching your deck and doing the 21 card trick...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Feb 4, 2012 11:06AM)
An economist trying to explain economic stimulus to a deadbeat.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Feb 5, 2012 09:28PM)
Missing the opportunity to have Nani be your assistant.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Feb 5, 2012 10:53PM)
Finding Obama's picture in your school year book.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Feb 8, 2012 11:14PM)
Playing in a restaurant or bar that still allows smoking.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Feb 9, 2012 02:30PM)
A tattoo that is almost spelled right.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Feb 11, 2012 06:58AM)
Pulling a hat out of a rabbit...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Feb 12, 2012 01:19PM)
Seeing the IRS phone number on your caller ID.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Feb 24, 2012 03:32PM)
Finding that you remembered everything for your two week tour except the charger for your cell phone.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Feb 26, 2012 08:02AM)
Showing-up to a duplicate address in the wrong city an hour away from the real party.

OR

Taking bad directions from the client and they have you guessing where they live.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Feb 27, 2012 08:01AM)
Putting a guy in charge of developing jobs who has never has one.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Feb 28, 2012 12:18AM)
Thinking your going to get a laugh doing x-rated humor at a Baptist Bible College.
Bad example.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Feb 29, 2012 09:47PM)
Learning during the show that you have confused your snow powder with your slush powder.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 7, 2012 09:24PM)
There is nothing worse than learning in a poker game that your not only have five of a kind but they are allthe same suit!
Message: Posted by: bowers (Mar 7, 2012 10:12PM)
Than having your thumtip hit the floor during a silk vanish with the silk hanging out of it.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 8, 2012 11:03AM)
Realizing that what you thought was your invisible deck is just a stripper deck.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 20, 2012 06:42AM)
Knowing that your act will follow a competent entertaining magician who just performed your show he learned from your DVD!
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Mar 24, 2012 12:09PM)
Learning that you just tied the world's only "slip proof slip knot".
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 8, 2012 09:12PM)
Paying more for a used trick on eBay than you could get it for new.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Apr 9, 2012 12:20PM)
Nothing worse then forgetting to lock the door on the lions cage

Someone might steal it.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 9, 2012 02:57PM)
Buying silks from a vendor who uses diagonal measurements to cheat customers into paying 4X what a properly measured silk shouild cost.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Apr 9, 2012 04:01PM)
That's standard in the TV business
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Apr 11, 2012 12:23AM)
Reading negative posts from individuals who make feeble attempts at humor as they trash other member's comments.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 13, 2012 02:38PM)
Getting on stage and knowing that your blank gun is not loaded!
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Apr 13, 2012 06:41PM)
Doing a dove trick too soon after they have eaten.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 15, 2012 06:54AM)
Realizing that you really are using an empty dove pan.
Message: Posted by: Bill Nuvo (Apr 17, 2012 11:22AM)
This video
http://youtu.be/U0P_iu5okbU
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 17, 2012 04:04PM)
Knowing that we thought there could have been something worse.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Apr 18, 2012 02:54PM)
Rubber cement that has fossilized.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 18, 2012 03:32PM)
A super glue tube you can't open
Message: Posted by: Bill Nuvo (Apr 18, 2012 04:19PM)
[quote]
On 2012-04-17 16:04, Bob Sanders wrote:
Knowing that we thought there could have been something worse.
[/quote]
Not Knowing that we thought there could have been something worse
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 18, 2012 09:46PM)
Governmental agencies in charge of governmental agencies.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Apr 19, 2012 07:49PM)
Purchasing your 20th expensive book test and finding out one week later that reviewers are indicating a soon to be released book test is the best ever.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 21, 2012 08:02AM)
There is nothing worse than performing Sucker Silk to Egg and learning that you are starting with the wrong egg.
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Apr 24, 2012 11:04PM)
Dynamike leaving the Café.
Message: Posted by: Believing (Apr 25, 2012 12:16AM)
Trying to correct a mistake, but making it worse.
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Apr 25, 2012 08:08AM)
All of your doves flying away outside.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 26, 2012 06:43AM)
Learning that cats sleep on top of your dove cage.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Apr 30, 2012 10:26PM)
Being reminded that you can not perform fire magic in a fireworks factory
Message: Posted by: MagicBus (Apr 30, 2012 10:42PM)
Having a baby only to have the excuse to buy "Audio Transposition".
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (May 1, 2012 08:47PM)
Having an entire audience that is bipolar - and in the depressive phase
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (May 4, 2012 12:57AM)
Being treated to a complementary meal after your show that is so bad and so spicy it could be used to take the paint off your car
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (May 10, 2012 08:49AM)
Getting financial advice from a bank or the government.
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (May 11, 2012 06:19AM)
Jay mentioning "Dynamike" hundreds of times: http://www.themagiccafe.com/forums/search_results_posts.php?search_id=7456317
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (May 11, 2012 11:11PM)
Learning that you will only have a hand-held mic available for your stage show.
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (May 12, 2012 05:35AM)
Finding out last minute your show is cancelled because of the weather.
Message: Posted by: joseph (May 12, 2012 07:11AM)
Taking lessons from the MM...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (May 12, 2012 09:49AM)
Knowing less magic than the Masked Moron
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (May 16, 2012 11:58PM)
Discovering you left your mask at home before the Masked Moron episode is to be taped
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (May 17, 2012 01:39PM)
Rehiring an idiot that nearly destroyed the organization.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (May 18, 2012 06:53PM)
Having the one of the most obnoxious employees in your old company now functioning as your supervisor after the merger.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (May 19, 2012 08:17AM)
Knowing the three magicians on before you just did your act three times.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (May 23, 2012 07:24AM)
Learning that the guy you voted for got elected!
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (May 25, 2012 11:47PM)
Dealing 5 aces during your opening act.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (May 26, 2012 12:24AM)
Predicting that Facebook was a good bet.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (May 26, 2012 10:25AM)
Borrowing out of debt strategy
Message: Posted by: Jon Blakeney (May 31, 2012 03:55AM)
There's nothing worse than...taking your cups out of the bag and finding no ballsin the bag,only to find they are lodged in the mouth of the bottom cup,a true story.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (May 31, 2012 02:37PM)
Finding that the shell will not come off the ball.
Message: Posted by: Jon Blakeney (May 31, 2012 07:46PM)
There's nothing worse than...the old Hare out of the arse line.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jun 1, 2012 01:25PM)
Having your coffee spill into your snow powder.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jun 15, 2012 07:21AM)
Remembering what was left in the car just as you walk out onto the stage.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jun 21, 2012 07:31AM)
Having to park in the rain two blocks away from you show.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jun 23, 2012 01:38AM)
Seeing that the elevator is broke and you have to cart illusions up three flights.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jun 23, 2012 07:16AM)
Borrowing an old maid deck to do card tricks...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jun 23, 2012 07:17PM)
Getting unloaded and set up for the show to learn that you are in the wrong building.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jun 24, 2012 02:10PM)
Bob Sanders posting seven times to your one

Remember the gold rule 'Do one to others before they do one to you"
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jun 24, 2012 05:45PM)
Trying to converse with a magician who talks with rabbits.
Message: Posted by: Howie Diddot (Jun 26, 2012 10:20AM)
Waking up at 2 AM and remembering that you never did the rabbit production and your rabbit is still in the rabbit pan.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jun 26, 2012 03:06PM)
A rabbit with a carrot allergy.
Message: Posted by: MagicBus (Jun 26, 2012 05:01PM)
There's nothing worse than trying to do magic in a windy outdoor band shell at a festival when it's 95 degrees with high humidity (true story). Aarrgghhh!
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jun 27, 2012 02:47PM)
Trying to do a show on an outdoor stage while kids are throwing a football in front of the stage.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jun 29, 2012 12:31AM)
Getting on stage and learning that your slush power was already wet.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jul 8, 2012 08:58PM)
Counting your doves to fine that they are almost all there.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jul 9, 2012 10:57AM)
Finding that you did indeed remember the Blank Gun but no ammunition.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jul 10, 2012 06:26PM)
[quote]
On 2012-06-24 17:45, Bob Sanders wrote:
Trying to converse with a magician who talks with rabbits.
[/quote]
The Politically Correct term is "Rabbit Whisperer". And there's nothing wrong with it as long as the rabbit doesn't talk back... in front of mixed company.

The Goat, on the other hand, is a liar!!!
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jul 11, 2012 08:19AM)
Finding whiffle dust spilled on everything in your magic case.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jul 16, 2012 11:15PM)
Your misMade Flag has been corrected.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jul 23, 2012 08:56AM)
Trying to float a table you can't lift.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Aug 8, 2012 07:12PM)
Learning that your invisible thread isn't!
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Aug 10, 2012 02:34PM)
Seeing https://www.floatit.com/ as a TV ad.
Message: Posted by: tons101 (Aug 10, 2012 07:27PM)
Being accused of using a trick deck when in fact you're not.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Aug 12, 2012 06:53AM)
Trying to teach a magic trick to the person who taught it to you.
Message: Posted by: MagicBus (Aug 13, 2012 07:09PM)
There's nothing worse than trying to use a debit card at Five Star Pizza in Colon...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Aug 17, 2012 09:24PM)
Picking up just your wand and then realizing that the wand was just a cover for picking up more than a wand.
Message: Posted by: MagicBus (Aug 23, 2012 05:09PM)
Being picked as a volunteer at Abbott's for Mac King and worrying your zipper is down...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Aug 25, 2012 09:56PM)
Getting the right card selected for the wrong trick.
Message: Posted by: hbwolkov (Aug 30, 2012 11:47PM)
An obstreparous Mind Reading Goose.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Sep 1, 2012 07:55PM)
Finding that you bought fireproof flash paper.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Oct 4, 2012 01:36PM)
Seeing that your last post of two months ago is on the same page as this one
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Oct 17, 2012 12:05AM)
Having to pay to park to do a free show.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Oct 19, 2012 07:27AM)
Being asked to do that trick where you throw the paper balls over the volunteer's head.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Dec 5, 2012 07:33PM)
Watching magicians do card tricks with cards they borrow from each other.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Dec 26, 2012 09:17AM)
Introducing a Cups and Ball routine with "Here is the latest in new magic".
Message: Posted by: Mike Brezler (Sep 13, 2013 12:24AM)
Being booed and you see it's your assistant.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Sep 17, 2013 09:52AM)
Doing magic outdoors in the rain with a handheld mic.
Message: Posted by: Mike Brezler (Sep 18, 2013 04:49PM)
Forgetting your assistants name
Message: Posted by: joseph (Sep 18, 2013 06:19PM)
Practicing the buzz saw illusion at Home Depot. ...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Sep 22, 2013 09:01PM)
Si Robertson sitting in the front row of your show with a shotgun waiting for you to do the duck bucket.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Sep 28, 2013 08:05AM)
Performing a jumbo card routine, and hearing someone say,
"Hey, look at that little guy doing a card trick!" ...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Sep 28, 2013 04:39PM)
Two hillbillies deciding to play the jug as background music to your act.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Sep 29, 2013 08:19AM)
Losing your hook in a One-Ahead routine.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Oct 1, 2013 11:42AM)
A layman wiping the motor oil off your needle thru balloon
before the show. ...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Oct 2, 2013 07:09PM)
Learning that you really are missing your blue silk for your mismade flag.
Message: Posted by: Mike Brezler (Oct 5, 2013 09:48PM)
An assistant with stage-fright
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Oct 8, 2013 07:57PM)
A stage full of old magicians telling the same old joke.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Oct 9, 2013 07:36PM)
Performing a headline prediction for the Enquirer...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Oct 9, 2013 09:15PM)
Showing up to a MAGIC convention in Las Vegas to discover it is a clothing show.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Oct 10, 2013 02:42PM)
Doing bar magic on a rocking ship. ...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Oct 10, 2013 10:02PM)
Playing a drunk magician when you are really drunk.
Message: Posted by: Mike Brezler (Oct 15, 2013 09:11PM)
A dead battery in your D'lite
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Oct 16, 2013 09:53PM)
Than a politician telling you he can make anything but your money disappear.
Message: Posted by: Mike Brezler (Oct 17, 2013 01:41AM)
Scheduling three magic shows on your wedding anniversary.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Oct 17, 2013 07:07AM)
Discovering that in your Silk to Egg routine that the first egg you are showing is the real egg.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Oct 18, 2013 11:59PM)
And you just shoved the silk inside of it.
Message: Posted by: Mike Brezler (Oct 19, 2013 07:57PM)
Pulling a lion out of your hat.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Oct 20, 2013 06:22AM)
A kid volunteer with an ice cream cone. ...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Oct 20, 2013 11:11PM)
When the audience realizes that you just had that girl tie you up with no intention of escaping.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Oct 21, 2013 02:55PM)
Turning your back while someone shows the selected card around. ..
Turn back around and there's no one there. ...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Oct 22, 2013 05:06AM)
The MC at a stage show hands you a cordless handheld mic and there is NO mic stand. (I haven't had that happen since last Tuesday in a Civic Center!)
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Oct 22, 2013 11:29PM)
Having to explain one of Bob's jokes to another forum reader.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Oct 23, 2013 02:33PM)
Having your nickel to dimes/21 card trick act follow Copperfield, Ricky Jay and Burton. ...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Oct 23, 2013 08:48PM)
Trying to carry a sword suspension through TSA
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Oct 23, 2013 08:56PM)
Learning that all of the silks in your 20th Century Silk set are the same color.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Oct 24, 2013 03:06PM)
Hooking your hoo coin to your leg and forgetting
you're in your underwear. ...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Oct 24, 2013 11:41PM)
Getting a free registration to last years convention.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Oct 25, 2013 07:51AM)
Getting on stage and seeing that your pull is not attached to anything.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Oct 25, 2013 03:08PM)
Ready to kill with your zombie routine, and the
first 3 acts before you are zombie routines. ...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Oct 25, 2013 03:44PM)
Having the MC introduce you with "I love to watch this guy throw paper balls over his volunteer's head"
Message: Posted by: Mike Brezler (Oct 25, 2013 06:14PM)
Really sticking yourself in the arm with a long needle.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Oct 25, 2013 07:27PM)
Spring flowers that don't spring!
Message: Posted by: Mark Boody Illusionist (Oct 25, 2013 08:46PM)
A rattle box that doesn't
Message: Posted by: joseph (Oct 26, 2013 06:29AM)
Really swallowing your threaded needles. ...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Oct 26, 2013 11:07AM)
A rabbit that won't be still
Message: Posted by: joseph (Oct 27, 2013 08:43AM)
Feeding your doves just before the show. ...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Oct 27, 2013 09:13PM)
Remembering where you left the real egg the second you sit down.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Oct 28, 2013 04:06AM)
Trying to do Zombie at a windy outdoor venue surrounded.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Oct 29, 2013 08:19AM)
Noticing a fresh new puddle under your Doves to Rabbit.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Oct 29, 2013 03:45PM)
Your wife giving away your 2 sets of Sugar Rush
candies to trick or treaters. ...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Oct 29, 2013 10:17PM)
Coming home to find your dinner cooking in your dove pan on the stove top.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Oct 30, 2013 03:00PM)
Dreaming you ate your doves and rabbits,
and not finding your pillow. ...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Oct 31, 2013 05:07AM)
Accidentally putting slush powder in you coffee.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Oct 31, 2013 02:33PM)
Grabbing your mutilated parasol by mistake in a raging rainstorm. ...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 1, 2013 03:55PM)
Watching an hour of card tricks that are not entertaining.
Message: Posted by: Mike Brezler (Nov 1, 2013 11:50PM)
Accidently setting your sneakers on fire, because nothing smells worse than burning rubber.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 2, 2013 05:48AM)
Learning that you have a dead battery after loading you car with props for the magic show.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 2, 2013 06:38AM)
Trying to fool someone at the magic club. ...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 7, 2013 06:24PM)
Realizing that you are using a full deck!
Message: Posted by: Mike Brezler (Nov 7, 2013 10:29PM)
Your bunny hops out of the hat before you have a chance to pull it out.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 8, 2013 09:05PM)
Losing the load that should have been in the TT
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 9, 2013 06:33AM)
Wearing a tt, sanada, and 4 coins in fp,
and someone wants to shake your hand. ...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 9, 2013 11:47PM)
Having nobody in the audience that has a dollar bill to use in the trick.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 10, 2013 08:36AM)
Getting hit with tomatoes 20
seconds into your act. ...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 10, 2013 05:21PM)
Having a loud band playing at the other end of the ballroom during your magic stage show.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 11, 2013 03:03PM)
Slipping on the juice from your bill in lemon. ...
Message: Posted by: Mike Brezler (Nov 11, 2013 09:40PM)
A baby crying as you are introduced.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 13, 2013 08:27PM)
Having the power to go out during your power wench levitation.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 14, 2013 07:43AM)
..or your hand shadow act. ...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 14, 2013 10:57AM)
Music too short for your routine.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 15, 2013 10:04AM)
Trying to book a show on Superbowl Sunday. ...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 15, 2013 03:43PM)
Using a table much too short for you.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 16, 2013 07:23AM)
Trying to make a balloon dog
look like 20 different animals. ...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 22, 2013 10:53PM)
After starting your MisMade Flag routine and learning that the flags never got loaded.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 23, 2013 03:31PM)
Changing a red silk to red...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 24, 2013 06:29AM)
Learning that none of your balloons will hold air.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 24, 2013 08:43AM)
Doing a balloon act outside in January. ...
Message: Posted by: bowers (Nov 25, 2013 10:38PM)
Your metal appearing cane hitting you in the head.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 26, 2013 03:02PM)
Diving down the wishing well to retrieve
your Lassen folding half. ...
Message: Posted by: Mike Brezler (Nov 26, 2013 04:47PM)
Getting a mouth coil stuck in your throat
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Nov 27, 2013 07:42PM)
A totally empty change bag.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Dec 9, 2013 04:45PM)
Trying to find a dollar bill in your wallet,
with all those hundreds in the way..
or vice versa...
Message: Posted by: bowers (Dec 9, 2013 08:31PM)
Having your tt fall off and hit the floor.
Message: Posted by: Mike Brezler (Dec 9, 2013 08:38PM)
Than trying to do an invisible deck routine with a regular deck.
Message: Posted by: Mike Brezler (Dec 9, 2013 10:25PM)
Falling asleep during your routine
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Dec 10, 2013 11:39AM)
performing Cut and Restored Rope and really cutting the wrong rope!
Message: Posted by: Mike Brezler (Dec 14, 2013 04:34AM)
Drinking 5 glasses of water right before your show.
Message: Posted by: Mike Brezler (Dec 25, 2013 10:24PM)
Schedule a magic show on Christmas.
Message: Posted by: Mike Brezler (Dec 26, 2013 09:22PM)
Not being able to see your Grandkids on Christmas.
Message: Posted by: Mike Brezler (Dec 26, 2013 09:30PM)
Not being able to think of something funny to post. This is my 1,001 post and I finally made the Inner Circle.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Dec 31, 2013 03:38PM)
There's nothing worse then someone posting nothing, just to make the inner circle :)
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 31, 2013 08:22PM)
There's nothing worse than Jay pointing that out.
Message: Posted by: Grasshop34 (Dec 31, 2013 09:03PM)
There's nothing worse than seeing another magician perform the vanishing bandana or close their show with a snowstorm and some BS story of never seeing snow. I've heard layman talk about how every magician they see hack those routines.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jan 1, 2014 07:07AM)
Knowing one balloon sculpture, and calling
it several different animals. ...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jan 6, 2014 07:43AM)
Trying to do MisMade Flag without a white silk.
Message: Posted by: arthur stead (Jan 6, 2014 07:34PM)
Popping multiple balloons during your Needle Thru Balloon trick.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Feb 8, 2014 08:35PM)
Doing a dove pan routine with matches that won't strike.
Message: Posted by: arthur stead (Feb 8, 2014 08:52PM)
Doing your Impossible Hank routine, only to discover that at the moment when it's supposed to become animated, you realize you forgot to switch it on!
Message: Posted by: joseph (Feb 9, 2014 09:20AM)
Having a spectator show you the
52 card pick up trick. ...
Message: Posted by: w_s_anderson (Feb 9, 2014 09:25AM)
If you read the title of this thread in its entirety on the forum topic page it says "There is nothing worse than Jay Leslie." LOL Sorry Jay, just had to point that out.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Feb 24, 2014 03:32PM)
..then doing a show for 4 million yen, and
finding out it translates to $15. ...
Message: Posted by: arthur stead (Feb 24, 2014 06:23PM)
Those people who call to ask you to perform for free at charity events.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Feb 24, 2014 09:10PM)
Holding your linking rings backwards
then counting two and the third falls down, already linked.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Feb 26, 2014 01:47PM)
There;s nothing worse then starting a thread and seeing it live for three years - only to die of exhaustion.

Long live "There's nothing worse then"
Message: Posted by: joseph (Mar 1, 2014 04:59PM)
Drooling when practicing
a sleight. ...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Mar 4, 2014 01:41AM)
Thinking you had the last word.
Message: Posted by: dzen871 (Mar 4, 2014 05:06AM)
To put uncapped marker pen in your pocket
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Mar 5, 2014 01:57AM)
Trying to use a vending machine and you only have bent coins.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Mar 5, 2014 06:59AM)
Some wise guy continuing this thread. ...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Mar 6, 2014 02:23AM)
When you have so much time you can do this:

Out of 540 posts in this thread, 443 were made by 5 people and 97 were made by 14 others.

Bob Sanders 181 @ 33.5 percent
Joeseph ( no last name) 98 @ 18.1 percent
Myself 87 @ 16.1 percent
HBWOLKOV 71 @ 13.1 percent
And in last place (of the major players)
Father Photius 34 @ 6.7 percent

With Mike Brezler coming up on the outside rail, a kittle late to the race but with lots of energy.

By page
In second place is Joeseph with 13 on page 17 @ 56.7 percent of that page
In first place is Bob Sanders with 18 on page 14 @ 78 percent of that page


Ok, all you nerds out-there, beat that!
Message: Posted by: joseph (Mar 6, 2014 07:02AM)
There's nothing worse than..
Not getting an Oscar for anything
listed in the above post ...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Mar 6, 2014 12:16PM)
Now I have to start over again.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Dec 5, 2014 10:53AM)
Finding out that you just cut up your stiff rope.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Dec 13, 2014 10:02AM)
Realizing that the double sided tape you bought is permanent rather than removable. (Both come in the yellow package!)
Message: Posted by: joseph (Dec 14, 2014 09:04AM)
When you do a jumbo coin act, and someone in back yells;
"Hey, look at that little guy doing coin tricks!" ...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Dec 16, 2014 08:09PM)
When you asks the volunteer what was the card he selected and he says, "Blue".
Message: Posted by: joseph (Dec 17, 2014 02:45PM)
Mistaking your fanning powder for r&s. ...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Dec 18, 2014 08:30PM)
Finding out on stage that you have loaded your MisMade flags in the wrong order.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Dec 21, 2014 01:21AM)
Working a bachelorette party and recognizing a few of the girls from your AA meeting.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Dec 21, 2014 08:58AM)
..and your closer is the passe passe wine bottles. ...
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Dec 22, 2014 05:48PM)
Learning too late that your dye tube is loaded with a silk of the same color.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Dec 26, 2014 08:34AM)
Having a kid with sticky hands help you with Mismade Flag
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jan 6, 2015 09:02AM)
Watching your flash pot on stage firing off before you are introduced to go on stage.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 6, 2015 09:59PM)
Having someone accidentally rub your suit with a sugary birthday cake, while walking by.
Then having a kid say goodbye with a hug and they're hands are full of cake.
Then you sit in your car and realize that a kid put a cupcake on your seat.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jan 9, 2015 11:20AM)
Doing the sub trunk with a 300 pound assistant...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 24, 2015 02:47AM)
Nothing worse then having some punk kid show-up late at a showcase and whine "You have no idea how difficult it is to carry 4 doves and "all" this equipment"

What a stupid, ignorant, did I day stupid... Punk kid.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Jan 24, 2015 07:48AM)
Trying to perform a Zig-Zag with a Double D assistant.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jan 25, 2015 08:56AM)
..but it would be fun practicing...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 28, 2015 09:04PM)
That, and the assistants reveng.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jan 30, 2015 09:03AM)
..producing a parakeet hanging from the
skin between your thumb & forefinger...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Feb 8, 2015 05:57PM)
Dropping the birdcage as you are loading in - so you quickly put the birds in your front pocket and when you get to the receptionist desk you realize that:
The receptionist is seated at the perfect height to see something wiggle around in the front of your pants.
Message: Posted by: JoshTmagic (Feb 9, 2015 10:57AM)
These are great!
Message: Posted by: joseph (Feb 9, 2015 03:15PM)
You're halfway through your show,
you still have to perform the milk
pitcher, lota bowl and multum in
parvo, and you have to tinkle. ...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Feb 10, 2015 04:56PM)
Having no where to change into your costume then your tip over trunk
and someone leaves a glass of liquid on top, while you're inside.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Feb 14, 2015 08:36AM)
Performing magic in front ot 65 hecklers. ...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Feb 14, 2015 10:32PM)
Having over 15,000 posts being ignore, at your own request.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Feb 15, 2015 04:00PM)
:) .. doing the salt pour with a cut in your hand. ...
Message: Posted by: RLMASKI87 (Feb 20, 2015 03:42PM)
An effect that involves the spectator to follow your instuctions and they find it impossible to understand to pretend to take a card out of the deck pretend to flip it over and pretend to put it back into the deck.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Apr 5, 2015 09:22PM)
Finding out you have the same volunteer you had the last time you did this trick.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Apr 13, 2015 10:59PM)
Realizing your best joke just died.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Apr 15, 2015 11:26AM)
..accidently breaking a rubber band, and having someone
tell you to restore it. ...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Apr 19, 2015 01:13AM)
See the new kid book more then you because he's new.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Apr 19, 2015 09:06AM)
Taking out a chiffon silk during a show
for the Hell's Angels. ...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Apr 22, 2015 11:09AM)
Reaching in the wrong side of the Change Bag, which is empty, so you change sides and that's also empty.
Message: Posted by: Rindfleisch (Apr 22, 2015 06:31PM)
[quote]On Apr 15, 2015, joseph wrote:
..accidently breaking a rubber band, and having someone
tell you to restore it. ... [/quote]

I hope they say it, then I go into Jumper.

Joe Rindfleisch
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Apr 24, 2015 03:10AM)
Realizing that your gimmicked coin isn't your gimmicked coin.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Apr 24, 2015 05:36PM)
Having 4 people try to book you on the same day at the same time
Then the one that does, cancels
Message: Posted by: joseph (Apr 25, 2015 08:39AM)
Sneezing while floating a dollar bill ...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (May 22, 2015 01:49PM)
Having two shows four hours apart - four miles from each other and 65 miles from home.
Message: Posted by: joseph (May 23, 2015 07:29AM)
Forgetting which of your 5 envelopes has your $100. ...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (May 29, 2015 03:14PM)
Letting Joseph have the last word.
Message: Posted by: joseph (May 29, 2015 03:21PM)
..Hey, I overheard that..
..using big words when you can use diminutive ones.. (thanks to djt) ...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (May 30, 2015 03:26PM)
We Sesquipedalians prefer the Quodlibetal approach.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jun 5, 2015 01:43AM)
Realizing that your original Jay Leslie prop is actually a cheap Indonesian rip off.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jun 7, 2015 09:02AM)
Ordering 100 silks, and they're all pink...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jun 9, 2015 11:03PM)
Nothing worse then realizing you are the only person who appreciates you posts.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jun 10, 2015 12:01PM)
..than doing the zombie surrounded...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jun 10, 2015 11:10PM)
Realizing that Jay Leslie appreciates his own posts.
Message: Posted by: itsmagic (Jun 22, 2015 04:04PM)
Doing the drawing board with a dried out marker...
Message: Posted by: itsmagic (Jun 22, 2015 04:05PM)
Or doing the Drawing Board with a permanent marker.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jun 23, 2015 09:46PM)
Jay Leslie covered in paint and realizing he has a show in 10 minutes.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jun 26, 2015 08:22AM)
..doing a birthday show for Bart Simpson
and Dennis the Menace...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jun 26, 2015 12:56PM)
[quote]On Jun 23, 2015, Father Photius wrote:
Jay Leslie covered in paint and realizing he has a show in 10 minutes. [/quote]

Last time that happened was last summer
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jun 27, 2015 10:07PM)
Your rubber chicken having a flat.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jul 3, 2015 07:08AM)
..having to use a toilet float for a zombie...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jul 3, 2015 09:28PM)
Realizing your whole show needs to be flushed.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jul 4, 2015 05:39PM)
Working a cruise ship for 2 months and realizing you drank twice the pay
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jul 6, 2015 01:41AM)
Reaching into your pocket for some woofle dust and coming out with a handful or rabbit poo.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jul 6, 2015 08:22AM)
Getting seasick in the middle of your cruise ship show. ...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jul 9, 2015 02:44PM)
A trick that works, but the audience doesn't get it.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jul 10, 2015 01:31PM)
There's nothing worse then 21 pages of nothing.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jul 10, 2015 02:46PM)
Jay leslie pointing out the obvious, LOL
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jul 19, 2015 08:05AM)
Memorizing a deck of Old Maid cards. ...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jul 22, 2015 10:44PM)
Trying to force a number card below a 9 in a pinochle deck
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jul 25, 2015 01:23AM)
Arriving with big illusions and all the doors in the theatre at only 29 inches wide.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jul 26, 2015 07:51AM)
Eating Doritos and playing with a blank deck. ...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Aug 2, 2015 12:51AM)
An audience that is drinking and you are not.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Aug 2, 2015 08:27AM)
Doing your cigarette act in
a no smoking area. ...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Aug 6, 2015 05:26PM)
Sitting on your dove load.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Aug 8, 2015 08:52AM)
Laying on your chair levitation and breaking the board. ...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Aug 12, 2015 06:21PM)
Half way through the trick you realize you forgot to put in the gaff
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Aug 12, 2015 06:41PM)
Having the party move a mile to the regional park and the house is empty.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Aug 14, 2015 03:22PM)
..letting a drunk show you a trick in the middle of your act. ...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Aug 15, 2015 05:35AM)
[quote]On Aug 14, 2015, joseph wrote:
..letting a drunk show you a trick in the middle of your act. ... [/quote]

With a better trick then yours and the drunk is 10 times more entertaining too.
Message: Posted by: MarkToland (Aug 15, 2015 11:34PM)
Grabbing your duplicate bag for your show which doesn't have your props in it.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Aug 17, 2015 08:23PM)
Sticky hands and wet cards.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Sep 2, 2015 03:05PM)
5 kids pulling out the same Tenyo trick you are performing. ...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Sep 3, 2015 02:49PM)
A kids who starts telling the secret to the trick you are doing.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Sep 7, 2015 09:40AM)
Having your host during your show asks you to "Do the trick where you throw the paper balls over their head."
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Sep 7, 2015 09:17PM)
Forgetting the birthday boy's name.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Sep 8, 2015 07:27AM)
Trying to do Professor's Nightmare with the two pieces of rope you found.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Sep 8, 2015 03:10PM)
Remembering that you are not an escape artist as they are lowering the crate into the water.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Oct 3, 2015 04:31PM)
..right before your show, putting your magic marker in your white
shirt pocket without the cap. ...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Oct 3, 2015 09:31PM)
Being half way through a trick and realizing you forgot to load the gaff.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Oct 6, 2015 07:31PM)
Someone giving you a five dollar tip and acting overly generous.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Oct 7, 2015 12:01PM)
Someone giving you a 5 dollar tip and later you realize he switched it to a dollar before putting it in your hand.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Oct 10, 2015 08:29AM)
..being the last act, and the first 9 are magic acts. ...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Oct 10, 2015 04:46PM)
[quote]On Oct 10, 2015, joseph wrote:
..being the last act, and the first 9 are magic acts. ... [/quote]

Who got standing ovations
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Oct 11, 2015 09:15PM)
Discovering you could have had Nani Darnell as an assistant 50 years too late.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Oct 17, 2015 08:33AM)
Arriving at your gig in your tux, and looking down at your slippers...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Oct 19, 2015 03:59PM)
You realize the title of this thread is "There is nothing worse than...(jay leslie)" and you stop and think, that pretty much says it all.

We love ya, Jay.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Oct 20, 2015 02:13AM)
Nothing worse then one and only one person brave enough to say good things about you.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Oct 23, 2015 01:40AM)
Having nothing but illegal immigrant jokes for your show at the Democrat Convention.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Oct 23, 2015 02:33PM)
Taking your mutilated parasol into a rainstorm. ...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Oct 24, 2015 09:31PM)
Almost being late to a show - realizing there isn't a restaurant nearby - and only havie a bottle of peppermint flavored extra strength tums..... so you eat 4
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Oct 25, 2015 11:24PM)
Realizing that was a real live goldfish you just swallowed and not the carrot one.
Message: Posted by: Bob Sanders (Oct 27, 2015 10:36PM)
Finding your flash powder is half water.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Oct 27, 2015 11:56PM)
Than having Bob test you by his posting three repetitive posts so you have to remove two.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Oct 30, 2015 02:47PM)
..doing the bra trick with your underwear version...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Oct 30, 2015 07:55PM)
Reaching into your pocket for your load and realizing it isn't your pocket.
Message: Posted by: Teyo (Oct 30, 2015 08:25PM)
Using a ID and the wrong card seperate
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 1, 2015 08:46AM)
When your reel spring goes 'boing' ...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Nov 1, 2015 10:34AM)
Not remembering how to do a trick after you have started it.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Nov 1, 2015 09:49PM)
Getting paid cash then loosing it before you can say Shazam
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Nov 2, 2015 02:46PM)
Then you reach in the other pocket and it's empty, too
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 3, 2015 02:37PM)
Slapping the styrofoam cup with
the blade under it...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Nov 5, 2015 08:32PM)
Forgetting your own name when introducing yourself.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Nov 7, 2015 02:49PM)
Getting a stomach cramp as the lid on the Milk Can is closing
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 7, 2015 03:55PM)
Doing the shoelace trick, and you're wearing loafers...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Nov 7, 2015 05:47PM)
Having a bad back and lifting your assistant up the Broom Suspension.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 11, 2015 04:39PM)
Someone cleaning off your needle before you
stick it in the balloon (happened to me)...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Nov 12, 2015 01:00PM)
Doing a dove act while standing outside in 110 degree weather.
After waiting 12 minutes for dedications, announcements and congratulations.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Nov 13, 2015 07:28PM)
Picking the volunteer from the audience's pocket and discovering that it was your own wallet.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 14, 2015 09:11AM)
Having 8 kids sitting under you at a
birthday party show...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Nov 14, 2015 03:52PM)
Starting the routine with the wrong patter.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Nov 16, 2015 06:38AM)
Dressing like an 1800 English colonial pirate for a classic Indian party where the women are dressed in their best sarongs.

(If people could shoot bullets from their eyes, I'd would have been dead)
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 16, 2015 10:28AM)
Doing a Houdini seance, and having Kim K. appear...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Nov 16, 2015 08:13PM)
Setting your alarm so you don't miss your next show..... in a month from now.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Nov 20, 2015 02:17AM)
Forgetting which one is the key ring.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Nov 20, 2015 02:48AM)
Trying a new mentalism act at a birthday party for 3 year olds.
Message: Posted by: Revel Rob (Nov 20, 2015 02:05PM)
Being a full time performer who does > 200 shows per year but still not having 50 posts. :(
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Nov 20, 2015 06:06PM)
Letting Joseph have the last word
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 21, 2015 08:06AM)
Letting my vent doll have
the last word...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Nov 22, 2015 06:53PM)
You were talking to someone about this guy who constructs very high quality and excellent magical props, and for the life of you , you can't remember at the time that his name is Jay Leslie.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Nov 26, 2015 07:08AM)
..Maybe that should be under the 'old magician' thread.. :) ...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Nov 28, 2015 12:01PM)
Saying "Thank you Nani Darnell" right after Gay Blackstone hands you a prop.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Dec 2, 2015 04:12PM)
Crazy gluing your clown nose on...
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Dec 3, 2015 09:19PM)
Watching Dynamike leave us.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Dec 4, 2015 08:29PM)
Or possibly..... seeing him come back :wavey:
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 4, 2015 10:22PM)
Dynamike leave? Say it ain't so, Joe, Say it ain't so!

Having a 300 lb volunteer on a 150 maximum load prop.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Dec 4, 2015 11:46PM)
Watching someone set a fool drink on top of your amplifier or seeing another performer doing the same, backstage, setting a wet drink on your new lacquered illusion. :eek:
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 5, 2015 01:16PM)
There's nothing worse having a very drunk lady at the front table decide she is love with you right during the middle of your act.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Dec 5, 2015 03:36PM)
Doing pink balloon animals for a Road Vultures motorcycle club...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Dec 5, 2015 04:01PM)
[quote]On Dec 5, 2015, joseph wrote:
Doing pink balloon animals for a Road Vultures motorcycle club... [/quote]

Would you please define the word "doing"?
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 6, 2015 07:55PM)
Having nothing but "blue" material and realize you are doing a show for a convent.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Dec 6, 2015 08:57PM)
Trying to shove a sigbed card in the wrong wallet because you left the trick one in your car
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 6, 2015 11:45PM)
Stealing a spectator's wallet to realize it is a vice squad badge.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Dec 11, 2015 02:01AM)
Placing yet another yellow page ad and still no one calls.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 11, 2015 01:22PM)
Actually thinking there still are yellow pages and that people use them.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Dec 13, 2015 07:50AM)
Seeing the wrong phone number on your
new order of 10,000 business cards...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 13, 2015 06:33PM)
Being introduced by another magician's name.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Dec 15, 2015 09:13PM)
Being under a roll-out stage when the crew decides to push it back against the wall.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 16, 2015 01:30PM)
Than getting to the bank to deposit your check from your last show and discover that it is post dated and signed by U. Benscrewed.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Dec 16, 2015 07:58PM)
[quote]On Dec 16, 2015, Father Photius wrote:
Than getting to the bank to deposit your check from your last show and discover that it is post dated and signed by U. Benscrewed. [/quote]

So you stand outside their house...with the same address on the check........- You were just there 4 days earlier..............It was a 30 mile drive and you're back............................. and you hold a sign................................
••••"U. Ben Screwed doesn't pay his bills"••••

And you stand there way past dinner time...........
Finally a neighbor comes out and tells you they moved in the middle of the night.

(I've been there)
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 17, 2015 01:15PM)
We all have, Jay.

Thinking you are a master magician when you are not.
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Dec 17, 2015 07:55PM)
Not receiving the check from the company you performed at because the treasurer quit.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 18, 2015 02:48AM)
Realizing you really did burn up the spectators signed $100 bill in that envelope.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Dec 18, 2015 12:51PM)
[quote]On Dec 17, 2015, Dynamike wrote:
Not receiving the check from the company you performed at because the treasurer quit. [/quote]


Or it was from a fundraiser for 1200 and they said the treasurer just got in her car for a vacation !!!
"If you can wait till next year, we'll have another fundraiser just to pay you !!!
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 19, 2015 10:17AM)
Hey, I worked that same fund raiser!

reaching for your dove load to realize you forgot to load it.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Dec 19, 2015 06:00PM)
Lapping a large ball bearing dead center...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Dec 20, 2015 06:41PM)
Dropping that pen in your jacket pocket where it falls tgrough a hole THEN travels around the inside of the lining to the other side.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 20, 2015 08:11PM)
Sneezing into your handkerchef and realizing that just before you sneezed it slid out of your hand.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Dec 23, 2015 07:09AM)
..and you had a nosebleed...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Dec 23, 2015 02:35PM)
Getting a 7 dollar magic kit for Christmas because your neighbor wanted to buy you some kind of magic thing
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 24, 2015 02:13PM)
Having your appearing cane trigger in your pocket
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Dec 24, 2015 06:02PM)
[quote]On Dec 24, 2015, Father Photius wrote:
Having your appearing cane trigger in your pocket [/quote]

While on a date.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Dec 26, 2015 04:30AM)
Making a New Years Res, I will not post a funny comment again because the entire section has dwindled to barely a handful of die-hards.
Knowing, fool well, I'll post another comment 01/01/16 at 5 minutes after midnight.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 26, 2015 04:08PM)
You're addicted, Jay, admit it!

A kid with a new Christmas magic set who shows up to your show.
Message: Posted by: ATL (Dec 28, 2015 09:25AM)
Realizing your hands are sweaty just as you approach part in the routine where you should do erdnase change.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 28, 2015 08:39PM)
Finding a hole in your pocket instead of your load
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Dec 28, 2015 08:51PM)
Waiting till the 31st for your next show.
Message: Posted by: ATL (Dec 28, 2015 11:46PM)
Realizing your thumb tip is stuck and you're meant to move into card routine next.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Dec 29, 2015 06:39AM)
The audience thinks you're dragging cheap toilet paper on the bottom of you shoe when it's really expensive flash paper, which ain't no joke.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 29, 2015 08:14PM)
Finding a load in your pants instead of in your pocket.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Dec 30, 2015 03:30PM)
Classic palming a razor blade...
Message: Posted by: joseph (Dec 30, 2015 03:31PM)
There's nothing worse than a double post...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 30, 2015 09:17PM)
Realizing that handful of raisins you just popped into your mouth from your pocket were actually rabbit pellets.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Dec 30, 2015 10:34PM)
[quote]On Dec 30, 2015, Father Photius wrote:
Realizing that handful of raisins you just popped into your mouth from your pocket were actually rabbit pellets. [/quote]

Thinking "Hay, That's a great idea... Just add water and you have an instant rabbit"!

(See you next year)
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 31, 2015 02:26PM)
Empty pockets on New Year's Eve.
Message: Posted by: ATL (Dec 31, 2015 05:42PM)
Empty house on New Year's Eve.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Dec 31, 2015 07:22PM)
Being set up for an 11pm show 6 hours early because you don't want to set up during their meal.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Dec 31, 2015 07:56PM)
Showing up for your 11pm show and realizing that nobody is going to watch because they are all aready too drunk.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 1, 2016 01:42AM)
I'm there, right now!!!
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jan 1, 2016 07:53AM)
..than today's hangover...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 2, 2016 02:45AM)
[quote]On Dec 26, 2015, jay leslie wrote:
Making a New Years Res, I will not post a funny comment again because the entire section has dwindled to barely a handful of die-hards.
Knowing, fool well, I'll post another comment 01/01/16 at 5 minutes after midnight. [/quote]
And doing just that in record time.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jan 2, 2016 02:56PM)
LOL, Jay , the man who breaks his NY resoultions before the New year.

Trying to manipulate a greased coin.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 7, 2016 12:47AM)
Nothing worse then leaving your house at 6:00 am for a library showcase where, ten years ago, there were 6 magicians and now there are 23. Yuck.

It's not very funny now but I'll look back on this and not laugh... And even though I won't laugh, I won't smile either... But even though I won't smile, I'm not too thrilled about it either. But even though I'm not too thrilled. I still have to get up early because it beats working in an unheated warehouse where the landlord raised my rent 60 dollars, just this very day of joyful not-smiling, not-laughing and non-thrillness.

I hope you found this amusing so one of us gets a laugh (that's one out of the four who reads these posts)
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jan 8, 2016 12:40AM)
I got a chuckle, Jay.

Than a 4 year old child who in total awe of you producing your gimmicked ooin, suddenly grabs and runs off with it.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 8, 2016 10:26PM)
Nothing worse then a small child giving you a big hug.................. with their hands covered in cake.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jan 9, 2016 03:27AM)
Than a parent calling you and screaming that their child has a coin stuck in their ear from trying to figure out how you pulled coins out of their ear.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jan 9, 2016 04:21PM)
Your lit cigar fell out of the p*ll...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 12, 2016 12:17AM)
You post one joke on FB and get 5 likes but you post 300 jokes here for a total of 2
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jan 12, 2016 02:51PM)
..when you sneeze halfway through
your floating cortk routine...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 12, 2016 07:54PM)
[quote]On Jan 12, 2016, jay leslie wrote:
You post one joke on FB and get 5 likes but you post 300 jokes here for a total of 2 [/quote]

And this doesn't get a like either :)
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jan 13, 2016 06:23PM)
Your assistant quiting and walking out on you in the middle of your levitation routine.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 13, 2016 10:50PM)
OR
Leaving the assistant on the broom suspension so you can walk in the audience and argue with a man as to whether he can see the strings!
(her one eye opening to see what's going on)
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jan 14, 2016 06:11PM)
An audience member who insists they can see the strings when you are doing a rope routine.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 14, 2016 09:59PM)
Someone asking "What is your day job?" while you're standing at a urinal.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jan 15, 2016 08:36AM)
So, urine the magic business, eh?...
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jan 16, 2016 04:23PM)
Boooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Than the joke Joseph just tried to make.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 17, 2016 08:42AM)
"Just tried to make"
Is that a play on words?
Message: Posted by: bowers (Jan 17, 2016 10:42AM)
Than having a lottery ticket with
five winning numbers on it.
But it was last weeks drawing.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jan 17, 2016 09:37PM)
Realizing that you are wearing brown sneakers with your tuxedo.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 18, 2016 04:46AM)
Your mountain lion is laying across your chest and you realize it might be in heat.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jan 18, 2016 11:20PM)
Realizing that you just gave the audience member the bank night envelope with the $100 in it.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 19, 2016 02:10AM)
Doing the 100 foot rope tie where 4 marines wrap you up like a sausage.
Message: Posted by: Revel Rob (Jan 19, 2016 10:18AM)
Having a client haggle and haggle you down, finally agreeing, then showing up to perform at their mansion.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jan 19, 2016 12:59PM)
Realizing that that bargain priced stack of 100 blank DVDs you just bought is actually a not so bargained priced stack of blank CD disks.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 20, 2016 02:42PM)
[quote]On Jan 19, 2016, Revel Rob wrote:
Having a client haggle and haggle you down, finally agreeing, then showing up to perform at their mansion. [/quote]

Having them haggle you down from 1000 to 500 because they only have 500 in the budget
only to give the show to someone else that charges 525 because.......... he must be better !
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jan 20, 2016 04:24PM)
[quote]On Jan 20, 2016, jay leslie wrote:
[quote]On Jan 19, 2016, Revel Rob wrote:
Having a client haggle and haggle you down, finally agreeing, then showing up to perform at their mansion. [/quote]

Having them haggle you down from 1000 to 500 because they only have 500 in the budget
only to give the show to someone else that charges 525 because.......... he must be better ! [/quote]
Definitely been there on that one.

Not being able to remember where you sat down your invisible deck and you have to buy another one.
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jan 21, 2016 03:00PM)
Getting outbid on a gig by a mime...
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 22, 2016 04:37AM)
After them running you through the mill, you show-up to hear

"Just do 25 minutes, we don't think you can keep their attention".
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Jan 22, 2016 08:33AM)
Hearing from a prospect, "How do I know you will show up?"
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jan 22, 2016 01:20PM)
Showing up and the prospect isn't there.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 22, 2016 02:05PM)
Or they moved the party 1/2 mile to the park with no note on the door.
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Jan 22, 2016 02:40PM)
Hearing a female prospect use the excuse, "I will call you back after I talk to my husband."
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 22, 2016 03:17PM)
Not knowing if Dynamike has more suits then you do.
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Jan 22, 2016 04:59PM)
Crying from any of Jay Leslie's jokes.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 22, 2016 08:54PM)
Crying from not paying the rent !
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Jan 23, 2016 11:45AM)
Performing at a nude beach.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 23, 2016 05:34PM)
Having someone, who is NOT in charge, insist that you set-up in a location that won’t work.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 23, 2016 07:22PM)
[quote]On Jan 23, 2016, Dynamike wrote:
Performing at a nude beach. [/quote]

Watching Dynamike performing at a nude beach
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jan 23, 2016 10:09PM)
Watching Jay watch Dynamike performing at a Nude Beech.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 24, 2016 03:58AM)
I can't watch myself (it's an Escher thing)
But that's not what you said.....
I just wanted to put an Escher reference in the mix so I appear intelligent. :)
Message: Posted by: joseph (Jan 24, 2016 08:01AM)
Escher choice to do so...
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Jan 24, 2016 08:06AM)
Waiting for so many years until Joseph to get an avatar.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jan 24, 2016 08:30PM)
Realizing that isn't the default avatar, Joseph really does look like that.
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Jan 24, 2016 09:14PM)
Drinking out of the Lota Bowl filled with Flint's, MI water.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jan 25, 2016 11:57AM)
Letting the EPA be in charge of the safety of your water supply.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 25, 2016 06:00PM)
[quote]On Jan 24, 2016, Father Photius wrote:
Realizing that isn't the default avatar, Joseph really does look like that. [/quote]
The hat or the rabbit.

Nothing worse then having the flu and getting up early to go give the kids at the party all your germs.
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Jan 25, 2016 06:19PM)
Performing in Africa where an air transmitted disease is traveling around.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jan 26, 2016 03:22PM)
Realizing that our open border policy has brought all those airborne diseases to the U.S.
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Jan 26, 2016 04:20PM)
Having The Magic Café shut down for ten years over a cyber attack.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jan 26, 2016 10:27PM)
Realizing the "Not necessarily magic, still..." forum is your main sourse of news.
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Jan 26, 2016 10:30PM)
Father Photius is posting right behind you.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 26, 2016 10:41PM)
Not yet.........................,,

NOW!!!
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Jan 26, 2016 10:51PM)
Jay Leslie is posting right behind you.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 28, 2016 02:08PM)
Flipping What’s Next around and something goes flying off it.
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Jan 28, 2016 05:02PM)
You drop a quarter, a child tries to pick it up, the child slips and bumps against a table, shaking a lit candle off the birthday cake, causing the table cover to catch on fire, scaring the kids to step on your props, getting ran over by the adults, the wallet your customer had for you burns to ashes, you using your Lotta Bowl to put the fire out, you slip down stairs and break your arm, you cannot perform for 3 months, you have no insurance and you get evicted.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 28, 2016 07:11PM)
[quote]On Jan 28, 2016, Dynamike wrote:
You drop a quarter, a child tries to pick it up, the child slips and bumps against a table, shaking a lit candle off the birthday cake, causing the table cover to catch on fire, scaring the kids to step on your props, getting ran over by the adults, the wallet your customer had for you burns to ashes, you using your Lotta Bowl to put the fire out, you slip down stairs and break your arm, you cannot perform for 3 months, you have no insurance and you get evicted. [/quote]

Is that why you were performing at a nude beach?

(21 posts up)
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Jan 29, 2016 01:12AM)
No, I was on Obama Care back then.

You perform a full magic show in the wrong room of the banquet hall.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jan 29, 2016 03:12AM)
That you realize , once you've started the routine, that you forgot to put in the gimmick in your circle square.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 29, 2016 03:45PM)
THERE IS NOTHING WORSE THEN LOOKING OUTSIDE TO SEE HOW THE PAINT IS DRYING ON A SET OF CHAIRS
ONLY TO SEE THEY’RE MISSING
THEN
FINDING THEM IN A NEIGHBORS OFFICE AND WHEN YOU TAKE THEM BACK THEY PUT THEIR FINGERPRINTS ALL OVER THE FRESH PAINT

CREEPS
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Jan 29, 2016 05:16PM)
Noticing last minute I am unable to drive to my gig overseas in UK.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 29, 2016 06:15PM)
[quote]On Jan 29, 2016, Dynamike wrote:
Noticing last minute I am unable to drive to my gig overseas in UK. [/quote]
At least you don’t have to sand and repaint 2 chairs again.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Jan 30, 2016 01:33AM)
You make a mad dash for the show and realize you are wearing Dynamike's shoes.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Jan 31, 2016 01:32AM)
Having nothing worse to report, then an hour ago.
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Feb 2, 2016 02:21AM)
Finding no one to post with this late at night.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Feb 3, 2016 12:09AM)
Or the next
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Feb 3, 2016 01:11AM)
Than realizing you just handed the key ring to the volunteer from the audience.
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Feb 3, 2016 03:02AM)
You are locked up on stage but misplaced your key to unlock yourself.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Feb 3, 2016 01:33PM)
Your birds fly into the rafters and your there 2 hours past normal closing time.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Feb 3, 2016 11:37PM)
Reaching into the wrong side of the change bag.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Feb 3, 2016 11:43PM)
It's 107 degrees,
the audience is under a big tent with fans and your supposed to perform on asphalt in the sun.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Feb 5, 2016 03:13PM)
Calling the birthday boy Melvin and everyone asks how you know his name.
Message: Posted by: Dynamike (Feb 5, 2016 11:58PM)
When you cannot think of anything to post in this thread.
Message: Posted by: Father Photius (Feb 6, 2016 02:28AM)
Signing a contract before reading closely enough to realize they were paying you in pesos.
Message: Posted by: jay leslie (Feb 7, 2016 01:39AM)
Being pragmatic and only taking one trick for your strolling gig
And it breaks.