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Bob1Dog Inner circle Wife: It's me or this houseful of 1159 Posts |
We all did them, more than once for sure. So I'll start with this one.
When I was about eleven or twelve, one summer day a buddy and I found a whole box (I'm talking a delivery type box for a retailer) of condoms near a small pond we used to fish at. They were the dry kind in little envelopes. We were old enough to know what they were for, but that's pretty much it. Kids today are much better educated than we were. Don't ask me how they got there or why, but they were. We just wanted to go fishing. We started blowing them up like balloons and thought that was a lot of fun. You could really blow those suckers up a lot! It was a secluded place and no one saw us. We tried making water balloons with them at the pond, but we couldn't tie the knot. This is where stupid rears its ugly head, if the above isn't stupid enough. Not really having any use for them at that tender age, we grabbed a handful each, stuffed them in our dungarees (that term is for another thread) pockets and rode about a mile home to the block we lived on in Queens. We hung out at the front lower stoop of my house for a little while and along comes a girl about our age or younger on a bicycle and my buddy and I looked at each other, grinned and each pulled out a condom, blew them up and waved them her as she rode by in the street, laughing and giggling as we did it, saying some stupid stuff I can't truly remember, thankfully. As luck would have it, my mother saw the whole thing through the aluminum screen storm door (no AC in those days) as it went down, and it did go down pretty quick, so she couldn't have prevented it. She called me inside, "Robert, get in here right now!" Simultaneously, my buddy John scrambled up the block to his house, not wanting any part of the rest of this mess. My mother was really angry. Remember, this was about 1959 or so and Ozzie and Harriet slept in twin beds. I honestly don't remember the rest of the tongue lashing I got, and I thought my father would finish the job when he got home from work that night. Maybe even a birds and bees lecture or something. And I don't remember what I did with the rest of the condoms in my pocket, but I'm betting I ditched them someplace before my father got home. But ya know what? Nothing was ever said. To this day I don't know if my mother ever told my father or not. And I'm happy with that thought. They were different times. I never did get a birds and bees lecture either. Am curious to know if any of you have. I shudder to think about the consequences of a twelve-year old pulling a stunt like that today.
What if the Hokey Pokey really IS what it's all about?
My neighbor rang my doorbell at 2:30 a.m. this morning, can you believe that, 2:30 a.m.!? Lucky for him I was still up playing my drums. |
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Michael Baker Eternal Order Near a river in the Midwest 11172 Posts |
I think we had a thread like this a couple years ago... some real doozies, too. Edit: Actually, I think it was stupid things done while drunk... hopefully not the same.
~michael baker
The Magic Company |
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Michael Baker Eternal Order Near a river in the Midwest 11172 Posts |
One of the stupidest things I did was at a friend's house. His folks were gone for the evening and we got the bright idea to have squirt gun war in the house. The critical difference though was that his mom was an Avon lady. We filled bathroom sinks on two different floors with cologne we poured from the vast collection of Avon bottles that were everywhere in the house. These were our "ammo dumps" for refilling.
We had a blast... until his parents walked in unexpectedly. I was told to go home, and I could hear my friend being beaten for blocks.
~michael baker
The Magic Company |
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Bob1Dog Inner circle Wife: It's me or this houseful of 1159 Posts |
Quote:
On 2013-11-05 01:08, Michael Baker wrote: Right Michael, hopefully not the same. This thread is about being stupid without the alcohol, weed, and other legal or illegal vices! Just straight stupid as compared to being stoned-out-of-your-mind stupid.
What if the Hokey Pokey really IS what it's all about?
My neighbor rang my doorbell at 2:30 a.m. this morning, can you believe that, 2:30 a.m.!? Lucky for him I was still up playing my drums. |
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Michael Baker Eternal Order Near a river in the Midwest 11172 Posts |
Yeah, there was a line that once crossed (involving "substance"), took one's "things we did" from stupid to epic.
Straight stupid... but as a kid, right.... Hmmm?? ... maybe thinking an umbrella would work as a parachute. Smacking several rolls of roll caps at one time with a brick. Cutting the paper away from roll caps and stuffing the powder dots into an empty Pixie Straw tube, while attempting to make a firecracker. That round of stupidity had an ending like a Roadrunner Cartoon when I poked the pile too hard. Taking arrows that had one of the fletchings (feathers) missing and shooting it straight up in the air and playing "Dodge Arrow" below. Licking the flagpole in winter (I never did, but have seen it done). Piling as many kids as we could on an abandoned car hood and using it as a sled. Actually, that was fun... it just hurt. Walking across a half-mile-wide frozen lake with two friends and finding areas beginning to break once we got to the middle.
~michael baker
The Magic Company |
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Magnus Eisengrim Inner circle Sulla placed heads on 1053 Posts |
Just for fun, here's the old thread on this topic. Glad we're here to tell the tales.
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned; The best lack all conviction, while the worst Are full of passionate intensity.--Yeats |
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Dr. Delusion Special user Eugene, Oregon. 733 Posts |
Back when I was around 8 or so, a buddy of mine and I were out shooting birds with out BB guns. That alone was pretty dumb, along with the fact that in was the middle of town, but it gets worse. I spotted a small bird sitting on a fence. Being the usual dumb kid, I never thought about what was behind the bird if I missed, which I did. I ended up hitting the passenger window of a car. The BB shattered the window, but it never collaspsed. Our first reaction was to run home, but we decided to see if we could find the BB so no one might think it was us.We found the hole and as luck would have it the doors were unlocked. I found the BB and noticed the hole it left in the window. It then dawned on me how to better cover our trail. I went and grabbed one of the small birds we had shot earlier. I carefully put it's beak in the hole and left it there. It was then we ran home and stayed inside watching cartoons the rest of that day. I sure would have liked to hear the guy who owned the car telling his insurance agent how the window got broke.
Bob. |
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gdw Inner circle 4884 Posts |
Quote:
On 2013-11-05 01:20, Michael Baker wrote: Jesus, that's horrible. Poor kid.
"You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one."
I won't forget you Robert. |
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gdw Inner circle 4884 Posts |
Not me, but mt father did something stupid with bows and arrows as well.
He and his brother had a bow and arrow (each) when they were younger, and they tried to replicate what they saw on TV. So, my uncle shot arrows at a target, standing beside which was dad, holding another arrow, trying to knock the flying arrows out of the air before they hit the target. They were, thankfully, not using hunting arrows, but rather target arrows, which have the bullet looking tip. So, my dad, wile swinging his arrow, swung too far out, or my uncle aimed to far to the right, and my dad took an arrow in the hand. Scrapping past his fingers, and the arrow in his hand, and it stuck into his palm. Not all the way through, but enough that it stuck in there and dangled from his hand for a bit. Years later, he gave his bow and arrow to me. Seemed like a good idea at the time, I guess.
"You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one."
I won't forget you Robert. |
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Michael Baker Eternal Order Near a river in the Midwest 11172 Posts |
Quote:
On 2013-11-05 08:59, Dr. Delusion wrote: That's actually as brilliant as it was stupid!! LMAO!!!
~michael baker
The Magic Company |
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Cliffg37 Inner circle Long Beach, CA 2491 Posts |
I think I have told this story here before, but I checked the old thread and don't see it.
When I was 10 or 11, I was given a book on codes. It included all the simple ones that kids use, and secret languages. It also showed how to use the juice of a lemon to make invisible ink. I tired that, held the paper over a light bulb, and it worked. It works quite well actually. So I took half a lemon, and rubbed it over myself to make myself invisible. I will let you guys replicate my experiment to see if it worked or not.
Magic is like Science,
Both are fun if you do it right! |
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MobilityBundle Regular user Las Vegas/Boston 120 Posts |
I suspect we all could max out the Café's capacity telling these stories. But here's a quick one:
I grew up in Las Vegas. As a kid (age 5-6 or less) I would LOVE to go "play in the desert." In those days, "the desert" was a block away from the house. One of the things I loved to do was break bottles I'd find. On a good day, I'd find three or four bottles to smash. When I was in kindergarten, something terrible happened: they started construction on a highway that ran through *MY* desert. This ruined everything: hills were flattened, a road was laid, an overpass was built, etc. Critically, no more bottles. But I had a brilliant idea: we had TONS of bottles at home! I was smart enough to wait until their contents were used up, but I drove everyone crazy telling them not to throw away any bottles, jars, etc. After a week or two, I had a pretty good stash. So I took my stash to the sad excuse for the desert and proceeded to smash them. Eventually, I ended up on the overpass overlooking the street. Throwing bottles off the overpass was satisfying indeed. But it wasn't enough... ... shortly thereafter, I saw a kid riding his bike on the street below. I remember this so vividly, I called out to him: "Hey kid! Tell me when there are cars coming!" Then proceeded to try to hit cars with bottles. Eventually, we succeeded in our new shared goal. The guy stopped his car and we took off on our bikes. We avoided trouble. And in fact, that was the beginning of a friendship that lasted for six years, before he moved to California. As an epilogue, it's fun to understand that story (and indeed, all these stories in the thread) through modern standards. Back then: 1. Parents were cool with letting their 5-6 year olds play in the desert unsupervised. 2. I was up-front with my parents about why I was accumulating bottles. (Of course, I didn't mention throwing them off the overpass, just breaking them in the desert.) It didn't even raise an eyebrow. 3. There was absolutely no obstruction to getting up to the overpass while it was being constructed. Not even a fence. No concern over liability. 4. Perhaps most shocking of all, kids those days rode bikes for fun. |
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Bob1Dog Inner circle Wife: It's me or this houseful of 1159 Posts |
We used to go to the railroad station and hide under the trestles, put pennies on the tracks and wait for trains to come along and flatten them. Dangerous stuff. Stupid.
What if the Hokey Pokey really IS what it's all about?
My neighbor rang my doorbell at 2:30 a.m. this morning, can you believe that, 2:30 a.m.!? Lucky for him I was still up playing my drums. |
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Michael Baker Eternal Order Near a river in the Midwest 11172 Posts |
Quote:
On 2013-11-05 15:09, Bob1Dog wrote: I grew up with tracks right across the street from me. We always had a problem with the vibration rattling the pennies off the track before the train could get them, or the engines had some kind of blowers to rid the tracks of debris (we weren't sure which). So we used to scotch tape the pennies to the track, and they'd get that one good rollover before the tape got cut and the pennies fell off. One day all we had was white medical tape so we used that. The tape oxidized or something, and the pennies stuck fast to the track and by the time the trains were gone, all we found were four copper spots burnished right into the rail head! The other thing we used to do was to wait until the engines went by (along with the crew), and then we start hitting golf balls at box cars. BANG! If you could hit one through an open door, all the better!
~michael baker
The Magic Company |
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Bob1Dog Inner circle Wife: It's me or this houseful of 1159 Posts |
Never had a problem with the pennies falling off. They may have fallen off after a few wheels ran over them, but we got flat pennies! Never had to use tape. That's interesting.
We also used to throw stuff at the third rail to see if we could get it to spark. I never sparked anything but a friend of mine claimed to have thrown a piece of chrome trim from a car on it and it sparked a storm. Don't know if he was truthin' or not but he seemed to describe it well from what I remember.
What if the Hokey Pokey really IS what it's all about?
My neighbor rang my doorbell at 2:30 a.m. this morning, can you believe that, 2:30 a.m.!? Lucky for him I was still up playing my drums. |
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Michael Baker Eternal Order Near a river in the Midwest 11172 Posts |
OK, see "third rail" is a foreign concept to me. I grew up with the Burlington Route (including the Zephyrs) and the Santa Fe (including the Super Chiefs) running through my town. We had steam, then diesel, but never electric trains.
Not that this had anything to do with pennies falling off the track, but maybe. Speaking of stupid stuff, some of my friends used to hop trains. I was always too scared to.
~michael baker
The Magic Company |
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NYCTwister Loyal user 267 Posts |
After reading the posts I've got nothing. You guys were nuts.
If you need fear to enforce your beliefs, then your beliefs are worthless.
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Bob1Dog Inner circle Wife: It's me or this houseful of 1159 Posts |
Quote:
On 2013-11-05 17:14, Michael Baker wrote: You must have seen some neat trains Michael. The trains I'm talking about were on the Long Island Railroad tracks!
What if the Hokey Pokey really IS what it's all about?
My neighbor rang my doorbell at 2:30 a.m. this morning, can you believe that, 2:30 a.m.!? Lucky for him I was still up playing my drums. |
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rockwall Special user 762 Posts |
I did some things as a kid that I would never admit to in an open forum.
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Bob1Dog Inner circle Wife: It's me or this houseful of 1159 Posts |
I've got one or two of those as well.
What if the Hokey Pokey really IS what it's all about?
My neighbor rang my doorbell at 2:30 a.m. this morning, can you believe that, 2:30 a.m.!? Lucky for him I was still up playing my drums. |
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