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joseph Eternal Order Please ignore my 17411 Posts 
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Two men are discussing their lives. One says, "I’m getting married. I’m sick of a messy apartment,
dirty dishes, and no clothes to wear." The other one says, "Hey, I’m getting divorced for the same reasons." ...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
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bigfoot Special user 502 Posts
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How do you circumcise a whale?
Four skin divers. |
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Father Photius Grammar Host El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo) 17161 Posts
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Why do magicians never turn on their headlights when driving at night?
They don't want to lose the suprise element.
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
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Father Photius Grammar Host El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo) 17161 Posts
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Why did the undertaker offer to bury the magician?
Because he saw that his audience was killing him.
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
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Father Photius Grammar Host El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo) 17161 Posts
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Why did the magician cross the road?
To get away from the audience.
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
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Dynamike Eternal Order FullTimer 24148 Posts
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Why did the magician pass his magic stick from hand to hand?
Because he was "wandering". You get it? huh huh. You get it? |
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Father Photius Grammar Host El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo) 17161 Posts
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Yeah, I got it, now how do I get rid of it?
Did you hear about the magician who got lost on his way to the show? It was a result of misdirection.
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
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joseph Eternal Order Please ignore my 17411 Posts
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A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight
live longer than the men who mention it...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
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Father Photius Grammar Host El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo) 17161 Posts
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Alimony, that means that Al of your money goes to her.
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
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joseph Eternal Order Please ignore my 17411 Posts
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Lazy People Fact #5812672793
You were too lazy to read that number...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
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joseph Eternal Order Please ignore my 17411 Posts
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The mayor of Detroit has a plan for
snow removal in the city.. It's called August...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
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bwinn New user Philadelphia, PA 12 Posts
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I was driving down the road and turned my car into a driveway.
Abracadabra, Hocuspocus, and all that Jazz
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joseph Eternal Order Please ignore my 17411 Posts
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For sale:
1 box of tic tacs in mint condition...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
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Probably Psychology New user 3 Posts
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Did you see that guy do the torn and restored routine? the method was great but the performance was TEAR-able
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joseph Eternal Order Please ignore my 17411 Posts
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Why did the magician cross the playground?
to get to the othe slide...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
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DaKine Oregon New user Medford, Oregon 50 Posts
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Q. What do you call a dog that does magic tricks?
A. A Labracadabrador! |
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joseph Eternal Order Please ignore my 17411 Posts
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How much for that weather vane?
Oh, it's on the house...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
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thatmichaelguy New user 67 Posts
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Did you hear the joke about the bed?
Of course not. I just made it up. |
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thatmichaelguy New user 67 Posts
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Did you hear about the circus fire?
It was in tents! |
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thatmichaelguy New user 67 Posts
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Did you hear about the latest pirate movie?
It's rated AAARRRR! |
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Posted: Jan 30, 2016 08:52 pm 
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