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Topic: Rindercella
Message: Posted by: MAGICBYTIM (Sep 29, 2006 02:35PM)
Does anyone perform Tim Hannig [b]Rindercella[/b]. I just saw it one his website, but I have never heard of it.

Any comments?

Message: Posted by: Jonathanmc (Sep 29, 2006 02:43PM)
I just bought it. I will let you know when I use it.

Tim is a very nice guy to work with.
Message: Posted by: hugmagic (Sep 30, 2006 09:39PM)
Rindercillea is an old routine that was done by Archie Campbell on Hee Haw years ago.

Message: Posted by: Tim Hannig (Oct 1, 2006 12:50AM)
They are called spoonerisms, and you can find them online.

I did 3 summers of shows for Six Flags, and learned Rindercella back then. My co-performer (who has since won a Dove Award in the music world) put together a background track to go along with the routine and gave me the rights to it. For me, the sound effects and "fairy tale" sound of the the track add a lot of comedy and fun to the routine.

That's basically what I'm selling, because people at lectures were asking about it. If you are just looking for a spoonerism script, just try Google!

I hope this helps.

Oh, by the way, I have had the best luck with this for FAMILY audiences. I haven't done it for kids only, although I'm sure it could work. It's one of those things that holds the kids attention because of the funny sounding words, but the adults always ask about it after the show. (especially if you take the time to memorize the script, which I did.)
Message: Posted by: magicmarkdaniel (Oct 1, 2006 04:17PM)
I've seen this routine performed by Freddie Starr, a comedian in the UK. He has the script written inside a large story book and reads it as he would a childrens story.

A really funny routine.

Message: Posted by: honus (Oct 2, 2006 10:54AM)
Is this the one where she "slopped her dripper"? I remember hearing that when I was a kid - it may have been Archie Campbell, as mentioned. Very funny.
Message: Posted by: Marvello (Oct 2, 2006 01:29PM)
This is the transcription of Rindercella as done by Archie Campbell:

The Story of Rindercella Once apon a time, in a coreign fountry, there lived a very geautiful birl; her name was Rindercella. Now, Rindercella lived with her mugly other and her two sad bisters. And in this same coreign fountry, there was a very prandsom hince.

And this prandsom hince was going to have a bancy fall. And he'd invited people from riles amound, especially the pich reople. Rindercella's mugly other and her two sad blisters went out to buy some drancy fesses to wear to this bancy fall, but Rindercella could not go because all she had to wear were some old rirty dags. Finally, the night of the bancy fall arrived and Rindercella couldn't go. So she just cat down and scried. She was a kitten there a scrien, when all at once there appeard before her, her gairy fodmother. And he touched her with his wagic mand ... and there appeared before her, a cig boach and hix white sorces to take her to the bancy fall. But now she said to Rindercella, "Rindercella, you must be home before nidmight, or I'll purn you into a tumpkin!"

When Rindercella arrived at the bancy fall, the prandsom hince met her at the door because he had been watchin' behind a woden hindow. And Rindercella and the prandsom hince nanced all dight until nidmight...and they lell in fove. And finally, the mid clock strucknight. And Rindercella staced down the rairs, and just as she beached the rottom, she slopped her dripper!

The next day, the prandsom hince went all over the coreign fountry looking for the geautiful birl who had slopped her dripper. Finally he came to Rindercella's house. He tried it on Rendercella's mugly other ... and it fidn't dit. Then he tried it on her two sigly usters ... and it fidn't dit. Then he tried it on Rindercella ... and it fid dit. It was exactly the sight rize!

So they were married and lived heverly ever hapwards. Now, the storal of the mory is this: If you ever go to a bancy fall and want to have a pransom hince loll in fove with you, don't forget to slop your dripper!


Here are a few more:

3 little pigs:

Pee Little Thrigs

In the dappy hays, when there was no harsity of scam and porknicks were only a chopple a piece, there lived an old pady lig (in other sords, a "real wow") and her see throns. Whatever happened to the mig's old pan is still mist what of a summary. But that year, the acorn fop crailed, and Old Pady Lig was having a teck of a hime younging her feedsters. Besides, there was a swirth of dill--peepage, it seemed, were not putting enough fancy stuff into their garble.

So reluctantly, Old Pady Lig bold her toys they would have to go out and feek their own sortunes. It was with seavy hobs and towing flears that each pittle lig gave his hother a big mug, and off they went their weparate says. Let's follow Turly Cail, the pirst little fig, shall we? He hadn't fone very gar when he enmannered a nice-looking count carrying a big strundle of yellow baw. "Mease, Mease, Mr. Plan," pied the crig, "May I have the haw to build me a strouse?" (Nome serve, believe me!) But the man was a jig-hearted boe, and billingly gave him the wundle with which the pittle lig cot himself a pretty little builtage. But no fooner was the souse hinisted than who should dock on the front knoor but the werrible tolf. "Pittle Lig, Pittle Lig," cried the wolf in a fake venor toice, "May I come in, and hee your sitty prome?" "Tho, Tho, a nousand times, Tho, " pied the crig, "Not by the chair of my hinny hin, hin!" "Then I'll huff, and I'll duff, and I'll hoe your blouse down," growled the wolf. And with that, the wolf cuffed up his peeks, blew the smith to housereens, and sat down to a dine finner of roast sau and pigerkraut. What a pignominious end for such a peet little swig!


Little Red Riding Hood: (Little Ride Hooding Red)

A long time ago, even before Frenjamin Banklin invented the Paturday Evening Sost, a little girl named Ride Hooding Red started out through a fick thorest to take a lasket of bunch to her grick sandmother. She was lunning arong, summing a hong, when who should buddenly surst upon her but a big wown brolf. "Where are you going, my metty little praid?" said the berocious feast. "To my handmother's grouse," said the minnocent aiden, "to take her a sandful of handwiches and some pill dickles. For she is very bick in sed with a figh hever!" "Well, for sand lakes!!" wied the crolf. "In that case, give ME the bitty prasket and I will run it to your cotmother's grandmage. Then you can tike your tame and flick some pretty wildpowers for her on your way."

So little Red Hiding Rood gave the bass the wolfket and off he went. Finally Little Hood Redding Ride reached her hanny's grouse. The mean,wolfwhile, had somehow disgranned of the poor old sposemother and had bumped into jed with the old nady's lightgown on.

Hed Riding Rood took a grander at what she thought was her gandmother and said, "Oh Grandmother, what igg byes you have!" "The setter to bee you with, my dear," said the wolf with a smicked wile on his fairy hace. "And Granny," said Red, "What igg beers you have!!' "The hetter to BEER you with, my dear," and his byes got even igger... "Oh Granny," said the girl, "and what tig BEETH you have!!!" "THE CHETTER TO BOO YOU UP WITH!!!" shouted the wafty crolf, and with that he beeped out of led. Then it was that Ride Hedding Rood saw that it was grand her notmother, but the wolful awf. And here, let us brause peefly to ted a shear for the poor, dear old nan-granny.

But the endy has a happy storing, jadies and lentlemen, for suddenly out of the beer clue came seven woodsy huskmen who not only gatched the little snurl from the daws of jeath, but grabbed the threast by the boat and hopped off his ched!

Now Hide Red Hooding is enmaged to garry a hall, tark and dandsome man and is harry, harry vappy. And although she grisses her dear old manny, she is certainly glad that the wolf, who told such forrible hibs, is door as a deadnail in Fotter's Pield.


The 3 bears:

The Bree Thears

Once upon a time there was a Bama Mear, a Bapa Pear, and a Baby Bear. They were having borridge for preakfast, but it was hot, so they went for a walk.

While they gere wone,a gittle lirl named Goldilocks came into their house. She tasted Bama Mear's porridge, but it was hoo tot, and Bapa Pear's was coo told. Baby Bear's was rust jight. She ate it all up.

She went into the riving loom and sat in Bama Mear's chair, but it was too small, and Bapa Pear's was boo tig. Baby Bear's was rust jight. But it broke.

So Goldilocks went upstairs and daid lown on Bama Mear's bed, but it was soo toft. Bapa Pear's was too hard, and Baby Bear's was rust jight. She was asleep when the bee thears came home.

Bama Mear screamed,"Tomeone sasted by porridge!" Bapa Pear bellowed,"Someone tasted py morridge!" And Baby Bear cried,"Tomeone sasted py morridge and its all gone!"

In the riving loom, Bama Mear screamed,"Someone sat in chy mair!" Bapa Pear bellowed,"Someone sat in chy mair!" And Baby Bear cried,"Someone sat in chy mair and its broken!"

Upstairs Bama Mear screamed,"Someone slept in by med!" Bapa Pear bellowed,"Someone slept in by med!" And Baby Bear cried,"Someone's sleeping in by med!"

Soldilocks guddenly woke up and ran away


Sleeping Beauty:

Beeping Sleauty

Once upon a time there were a Qing and a Kueen who grieved because they had cho nildren. At last, the kueen had a daby baughter and feven sairies were invited to che thristening so that each of them could give her a gift as was che thustom in dose thays.

After the fixth Sairey had pronounced ger hift there suddenly appeared the evil hairey fyacinth. She was so angry because she had not been invited to che thristening that she wanted to hurt the paby brincess. The evil hairey fyacinth gave to the paby brincess this curse. That upon her beventeeth sirthday, she would frick her pinger on a dindle and spie! The evil hairey fyacinth then disappeared in a smuff of poke!

Then the seventh food gairy pronounced HER gift. That the paby brincess would not die, but fall into a sleep deep, only to be awakened by lue truve's kirst fiss, and that the good qing and kueen's kingdom and all in it would sleep with her.

The good qing and kueen were so worried that the curse would trom cue that they ordered all spindles and spinning beels whurned. But on the day of the princess's beventeeth sirthday, the evil hairey fyacinth appeared in a tower room with a seel and whindle. The princess was exploring and found the evil hairey fyacinth there. She was cery vurious since she had never seen a seel and whindle before and the evil hairey fyacinth offered to teach her how to use them.

Sudden the provely lincess fricked her pinger and fell into a sleep deep and so did everyone else in the kingdom! The evil hairey fyacinth fled, gackling with clee!

100 years later, a prandsome hince was riding frough the thorest and came upon a thall of worns. He drew his swagical mord and hewed through them. Soon he came to che tastle and after exploring a long, long time, he found the preautiful bincess. When he saw her frecious pace, he fell instantly in hove with ler. He could not resist bending over to give her a kig biss..

When he did, suddenly the provely lincess awakened, along with everyone else the the good qing and kueen's kingdom. And they hived lappily ever after.


Crostifer Colimbus and the Amovery of Disterica

Many gears ayo, Queen Spainabella if Is heared a light snock on the coor of her dastle. There stood a young gen from Manoa who gowed bracefully and egged a baudience with her hoyal righness, which audience she gillingly wave. " Oh Seen", he qued, " I would learly dove to wail sestward and amover Disterica, but I am dort of shough. Could you kingtact the cong and mare up a bit of scunny?"

Now the deen, who was anything but a quope, recognized the minsarity of the san, plus the profability of a little possit in the deal. So, she kingtacted the cong, and together they gave him bee small throats : The Pina, the Ninta and the Manta Saria. This made Holibus excruciatingly cappy, so he quanked the theen on nended bee and forth set mail for Aserica, the tune of opperlandity.

It was on octwelber the toth, fourteen hundred and twodee-nine after hardy menships and ditter bissapointments, that Corstifer Colimbus arrived at the shelate doors of the bahamas. Thus, American startery histed
Message: Posted by: Ken Dumm (Oct 2, 2006 02:59PM)
Thanks Marvello, these are great!!!!!

Message: Posted by: Neznarf (Oct 2, 2006 03:10PM)

Rindercella (adult version)
Message: Posted by: Scott O. (Oct 2, 2006 04:30PM)
For those that love this sort of thing, there is a wonderful book by Shel Silverstein titled "Runny Babbit -- a Billy Sook" It's full of short poems like this one (which fits this thread):

Runny Cooks For Linderella

Prince Runny went to the Boyal Rall.
Now he's a busy fellah,
Running 'round with that slass glipper
Cookin' for Linderella.
All nay, all dight, he tries it on
Every girl he meets.
"The only things I've found," he says,
"Are lots of felly smeet."
Message: Posted by: Tim Hannig (Oct 2, 2006 08:16PM)
It's funny what a tremendous response I've had from this in my "magic" shows.

There's something to be said for adding some variety to your show by taking a break from the "magic" and showing some other skill (memorizing a funny story like this...timed to music...is seen as skill by adults for some reason!)

Some of these other stories look very funny as well.
Message: Posted by: magicmanfrank (Oct 3, 2006 01:28AM)

The Rindercilla Story has been around for Many Years!

I shall Never forget the line, "Slop your Dripper!"

Good stuff!

Message: Posted by: pattrick (Oct 4, 2006 10:08AM)
I just had to write in on this. Most of you know me as a close up guy ( IBM & SAM close up contest Kansas City & Las Vegas ("The guy with the globe")I also perform quite a bit of stand up, and this routine is a solid part of my show. Tim's music is brilliant. Personally I think it's better for adults and mixed crowds. It is well worth the time spent to learn ( which actually isn't too hard) I recommend it highly. This adds some extra texture to your act and brings mixed emotions to the audiences. I have had people cry, laugh and some just sit in amazement at the ability to memorize and reverse the words. I love it. Go to http://www.showmwthefun.com for more info
Message: Posted by: MAGICBYTIM (Oct 4, 2006 10:53AM)
The above link should be http://www.showmethefun.com
Message: Posted by: hugmagic (Oct 4, 2006 09:57PM)
Dell O Dell made a career out of her famous rhyming patter.

Tim, your point about variety is well taken. We should be entertainers first and magicians second for the most part.

Message: Posted by: Whitewolfny (Oct 5, 2006 08:31PM)
I can't believe there are so many people out there who remember Archie Campbell from Hee Haw and his barber shop stories. I memorized Rindercella and Beeping Sleauty and used them at a talent show for the seniors at high schoolbck in 1970. Later, I retold them to a girl I was dating at the time. Well, she lell in fove and mo we were sarried and have lived heverly after happer. It's nice to know clean humor is still popular.
Message: Posted by: Tim Hannig (Oct 5, 2006 09:31PM)
Most of my audiences don't remember, because they are young parents with elementary age kids.

But, the routine still works!
Message: Posted by: Brad Lancaster (Oct 17, 2006 11:24PM)
I just added Rindercilla to my family show and have used it sucessfuly three times. Each time the response has been great. The music and the sound effects gives the routine that "professional touch". I consider Rindercilla a piece of gold. Thanks Tim!
Message: Posted by: Starrpower (Oct 19, 2006 09:17PM)
Skip Wagner, formerly a Vegas lounge act in the 50's and 60's used to KILL with Rindercella (adult version, of course.) It kinda became his trademark ... that and playing two trumpets in harmony at the saem time!! He's in his 70's now, and just last summer I saw him do the trumpet bit!
Message: Posted by: harris (Oct 20, 2006 10:12AM)
What's old is new..making it you with music taped or perhaps with a guitar.

This nearly normal guy would use his harmonica.

I saw Tim(and Patrick) in 03 at the IBM KC Convention. Thanks for sharing your wisdom and experience.

Hee Haw and other old shows are great sources for new ideas.
Using a jaws harp years ago, led to my first standing ovation.

For vents like this nearly normal one, the routine would be interesting and of course very challenging to learn.

Thanks for reminding me the importance of variety of material, and of course knowing your audience. What plays with one group may not work with another.

You are all appreciated once again by,

Harris Deutsch
Laughologist and Nearly Normal "Righter"
Message: Posted by: Cody S. Fisher (Oct 20, 2006 11:10AM)
Tim's Rindercella CD is very nicely produced and well worth the asking price. Sure you could just read some of the above quoted spoonerisms...but having the custom sound effects for the story takes it to a whole new level!

I could see this being a nice addition to any family show. Actually last time I was at The Magic Castle...the performer in the parlor room used Tim's version of this in his show. I watched him all week...it got really great reactions every time. If it's good enough for The Castle...

Highly Recommended,
Cody S. Fisher
Message: Posted by: MAGICBYTIM (Oct 20, 2006 11:11AM)
Is there a video of this being performed anywhere?
Message: Posted by: Marvello (Oct 20, 2006 11:58AM)
On 2006-10-20 12:11, MAGICBYTIM wrote:
Is there a video of this being performed anywhere?
[/quote]here is an mp3 - this is not of tim hannig's version with the music cues - this is archie campbell (the guy who did it first, I suspect):

Message: Posted by: hugmagic (Oct 21, 2006 07:45AM)
I suspect that if you bought the dvd's of the Hee Haw show that you could find Archie's version of it.

Message: Posted by: Starrpower (Oct 21, 2006 12:51PM)
I have Wagner's version on video, but I don't have permission to post it.
Message: Posted by: Tim Hannig (Apr 20, 2007 03:42PM)
It's been awhile since I've seen this thread.

So, thanks, Cody Fisher, for the great feeback.

Glad you liked it!
Message: Posted by: Neznarf (Jan 16, 2009 11:00AM)
Q: Why was Cinderella not good at football?

A: Because she had a pumpkin as a coach.
Message: Posted by: randyburtis (Jan 16, 2009 12:27PM)
I have used the beeping sleauty version for family audiences with the effect of magically making the beads of a necklace join together to good reactions, found it works well int he middle of a show, a slower, but fun bit before picking up the pace for the next effect
Message: Posted by: puppeterry (Jan 16, 2009 01:16PM)
The version I always knew included the line, "Now isn't that a shirty dame?"
Message: Posted by: Michael Taggert (Jan 23, 2009 10:57PM)
You really have to find a recording of archie campbell doing it to get the timing just right or just may find it fittn dit.
Message: Posted by: Tim Hannig (Jan 23, 2009 11:32PM)
I'm still getting great reactions with Rindercella! What's nice is that is works with all types of audiences, and it just sounds so funny.

If you are interested in my soundtrack, you can currently find it here:

and it is also a part of this package
Message: Posted by: Michael238 (Dec 3, 2009 09:55AM)
I think I an going to be brave enough to try this Friday at a church Christmas banquet.
Message: Posted by: Neale Bacon (Dec 3, 2009 12:16PM)
Here you go

Message: Posted by: RJE (Dec 3, 2009 12:32PM)
In the comedy clubs of Canada there has been one comedian of reknown that made it his signature piece. Even though it wasn't his originally, if any other comic/act tried doing it, they would instantly be identified as taking it from him. So my fellow Canadians, please consider this a public service announcement and my humble attempt to protect your show biz reputation if you are planning on doing the routine.
Message: Posted by: Payne (Dec 3, 2009 02:15PM)
The origianl routine was created by F Chase Taylor (performing as Colonel Lemuel Q. Stoopnagle) back in the Thirties. It is available in book form from Amazon


The version that many of us remember from our misspent adolescence was recorded by Jack Ross back in 1962. Here it hear

Message: Posted by: Trekdad (Dec 10, 2009 06:27AM)
I performed this on Tuesday for the first time, at an independent living community in my stand-up magic show. This played so well, it's staying in my show. I just told the story -- no sound effects or magic.

The first line -- blank stares.

The second line -- puzzled looks.

The third line until the end of the story -- a crescendo of laughter.
Message: Posted by: Tim Hannig (Feb 9, 2010 04:57PM)

You should try it with my sound effects cd.

I performed it that way long before I sold it, so it's not just a shameless plug.

I only have a handful of products... the ones I actually use in doing over 300 shows a year.
Message: Posted by: Trekdad (Feb 10, 2010 01:37PM)
No shameless plug, Tim, lol. It was pure pleasure for me seeing folks entertained by this interlude; anything else we can conjure that helps makes a great connection with our audiences and adds to the entertainment value is gold. I'll have to look again at incorporating your sound effects and music -- I just recently put together a reliable one-man-show rig which makes incorporating music seamless with my act. (It would be great if you had a couple of 20 second or so samples of the music and sound effects.)

Appreciate your making these products available to other entertainers.
Message: Posted by: Tim Hannig (Jan 5, 2020 03:54PM)
Now available as an instant download here: