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Topic: Please critique this comedy routine
Message: Posted by: meilechl (Sep 24, 2007 04:04AM)
[quote]
On 2007-09-22 20:15, meilechl wrote:
I just thought of a new routine to use in my comedy shows. It's very fresh so I just have the outline without any gags, jokes etc.; feel free to add some.

Needed:
Super Jumbo Dream Bag
Appearing Broom
Appearing Shovel
Appearing Metal Cane

The storyline is that I came home from vacation and I bought my wife a present - a broom. She got the hint and didn't like it one bit so she ordered ME to do some work - with the shovel. When I tried to resist she became quite scary - cane. I tried to palacate her but by I didn't have any other presents. Being a magician, this was no problem and I conjured up some flowers.

What do you think? Any comments/gags/jokes?
[/quote]
Message: Posted by: JamesTong (Sep 24, 2007 04:17AM)
How about appearing the 10 foot straw to offer her a drink?
Message: Posted by: meilechl (Sep 24, 2007 05:05AM)
There goes another $30...
Message: Posted by: JamesTong (Sep 24, 2007 08:26AM)
Before you produce and pass the straw to her, you can appear the water bowl from bag first. I don't know how much this will cost :) but it is a very good effect.
Message: Posted by: Tom Cutts (Sep 24, 2007 01:30PM)
Where is the comedy? Where is the magic? Are these just throw away gags?
Message: Posted by: Nedim (Sep 24, 2007 05:04PM)
You must find your style before choosing your tricks.

magicially yours,


Nedim Guzel
Message: Posted by: meilechl (Sep 25, 2007 05:14AM)
[quote]
On 2007-09-24 18:04, Nedim wrote:
You must find your style before choosing your tricks.

magicially yours,

Nedim Guzel
[/quote]
Huh?


[quote]
On 2007-09-24 14:30, Tom Cutts wrote:
Where is the comedy? Where is the magic? Are these just throw away gags?
[/quote]
So you see nothing magical in producing items from thin air (or empty bags)?
Message: Posted by: JamesTong (Sep 25, 2007 11:51AM)
I believe the magic and comedy lies in the presentation and acting out the storyline of the performance.

There is nothing wrong with producing those items.
Message: Posted by: Nedim (Sep 25, 2007 05:04PM)
Hi,

I want to say same things as JamesTong.


magicially yours,


Nedim Guzel
Message: Posted by: Pete Biro (Sep 28, 2007 12:34AM)
Not a good idea to get "greedy" with a priciple. They are all the same method, so you lose the MAGICAL aspect.
Message: Posted by: Sealegs (Sep 28, 2007 04:11PM)
You'll lose the magical aspect from using the same principle only if the audience is aware, or becomes aware of, the principle. Repeat uses of it might make that more likely but it is not necessarily so. Sometimes repetition can even provide the hook for the comedy and the magic. (eg 6 card repeat)

Remember props in themselves aren't funny; here Meilechl doesn't appear to be solely relying on them for laughs as he has a vehicle in which to frame them. ie:the story. But as James Tong said: "the magic and comedy lies in the presentation and acting out the storyline of the performance."

Meilechl I think the best thing you can do is ask yourself do these props and this premise/storyline provide a solid framework for you to exercise your comedy chops?
Message: Posted by: graywolf (Sep 28, 2007 04:34PM)
It is all the same trick..Howard
Message: Posted by: wol (Sep 29, 2007 04:32AM)
What would make this routine funny is YOU, so without knowing you and your style I cannot comment, the idea is there but a routine is not, try filming it and playing it back to some friends or post it here. The n you can get an idea of if it works or not as a routine but all you have now is a good idea and a shopping list!
Message: Posted by: kosmoshiva (Sep 29, 2007 09:39AM)
If I was a layperson watching all that big stuff coming out of a small bag, and with the storyline you're proposing - I'd expect your wife to come out at the end!
Message: Posted by: tpax (Sep 29, 2007 10:37AM)
The last production should be a surprise. After pulling out all the large objects they will expect another large object. So to get a laugh do the opposite, build the suspense by using logic to point towards the next production, something large, and go in the complete opposite direction and produce something small or do a transformation, something funny. This is the punch line of the routine.
Message: Posted by: JamesTong (Sep 29, 2007 01:06PM)
[quote]
On 2007-09-29 10:39, kosmoshiva wrote:
If I was a layperson watching all that big stuff coming out of a small bag, and with the storyline you're proposing - I'd expect your wife to come out at the end!
[/quote]

The wife coming out with the appearing broom ... LOL great idea kosmoshiva
Message: Posted by: Nedim (Sep 29, 2007 07:14PM)
First you must find a character for yourself. Then you can think of performing comedy with that character.

magicially yours,


Nedim Guzel
Message: Posted by: meilechl (Sep 29, 2007 09:08PM)
I regularly perform at 'sheva brachot' - Jewish cutom of nightly meals/parties in the week following a wedding. I'm not hired as a magician but rather as an 'entertainer'. I'm expected to make the paople laugh and entertain them. Unlike when I do familyparties where I'm booked as a magician and people expect to see a magic show, here I can't perform magic for the sake of magic.

I'm therefore very limited in the kind of magic I can perform. For one, as it's parlour style, card tricks are more-or-less out. So is cups and balls etc. as these are just 'magic' items. Mentalism is also out as it's very hard for me to get audience participation in this kind of setting.

I look for tricks that play to a crowd, are entertaining an, if possible, are marriage/spouse themed.

I now do a C&R rope/Proff. Nightmare routine, burnt money to nest of envelopes, sucker egg to silk, One Way Trick, Drink Monte and some others. I sometimes do a silent opener with eggs from mouth, coils, and egg on fan.

All of the above play big, hardly involve audience members and can be very entertaining/funny.

This new routine is still in the 'kitchen' and I'm still adding and mixing the ingredients. I'm gonna start along the lines of, 'Hey, Groom, don't buy your wife some useless presents like jewlery, flowers etc. For my wife's birthday I bought her something she could use (broom production), for our anniversary it was something useful for the garden (shovel production). Of course when you buy such presents it's important to wear body armour - if you know what I mean (wink) and I think you (point to someone) know... Because when my wife gets mad she doesn't just open her mouth she(cane production)...'

This is more-or-less the outline I'm thing of now.
Message: Posted by: Tom Cutts (Sep 30, 2007 06:30PM)
[quote]
So you see nothing magical in producing items from thin air (or empty bags)?
[/quote]
For starters I see no where you saying "produced from thin air." I'm not even sure you said "production"... in the first post until you got to the cliche flowers which are "conjured up". It could well be that the funny story is funnier if the props are not produced by magic. If you aren't there to do magic, why use magic to produce these props?
Message: Posted by: Alan Wheeler (Oct 4, 2007 02:35AM)
Hi

I want to say the same things as Pete Biro and James Tong.

Alan Wheeler
Message: Posted by: magicgeorge (Oct 4, 2007 08:36AM)
I recently purchased a dream bag. They are pretty cliche but the former more than the latter.

I had the same thought about a pole style production followed by the flowers.

I agree with Mr Biro about over using a principle, it's an easy trap to fall into especially with the kind of effect you enjoy doing.

The flowers are different enough to the pole (you can also show the bag empty before the flowers using the explanation of the wife seeing if that was all you bought her) but 3 poles may be overkill.

I think any any audience can appreciate the humour in an unthoughtfull husband buying his wife a broom and the flowers are a logical conclusion.

I also enjoy the concept of walking on stage with a paper bag and filling the stage with it's contents.

I think you could definitely go somewhere with this idea.

I don't really see Mr Cutts' point. Even from your brief description I can see why this routine could be both comical and magical.

George
Message: Posted by: Cabrera (Oct 21, 2007 11:24PM)
At the end you could produce a Nielson beer or champagne bottle
Message: Posted by: Paulo Cabrita (Dec 3, 2007 03:46PM)
That make sense.

paulo