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Topic: Please help - Comedy Ideas for Painters and Decorators
Message: Posted by: glodmagic (Feb 27, 2004 04:08PM)
I am performing for a Anniversary Banquet of Painting and Decorating Contractors. I was booked primarily as a stand up comic for this gig but intend to bring my "comfort props"(like comfort food) as a security blanket as well as some proven Ventriloquism routines I do.
Help me guys/gals with some ideas, magic routine suggestions, and jokes patter related to this venue.

It seems to me that a group in the visual (decorating) business would be easy to routine for but I am drawing a blank at the moment.
Message: Posted by: David (Feb 27, 2004 04:27PM)
Glodmagic, can't think of many jokes on painters but
a colleague of mine does a colour changing deck routine where he talks of the extra layers of varnish on the back of playing cards , to enhance the spectators awareness of the colour change .
A cups and balls type effect using paint pots ?
Message: Posted by: johnpert (Feb 27, 2004 08:07PM)
Put a paint label around a beach lota bowl and use food colouring to make water a colour of paint. Not sure how good it will look, just an idea.

Use a brush as a wand, make a brush into the brake away wand.

do a painting/colouring effect there is stuff on the market.

torn and restored wallpaper


Message: Posted by: glodmagic (Feb 28, 2004 08:57AM)
Excellent ideas! Keep them coming please.
Message: Posted by: Cabrera (Feb 28, 2004 04:23PM)
Here;s a rough draft of an idea for professors nightmare. If you like it, we can tweak it out

As decorators and contractors, you know how important it is to accurately measure something. And you contractors know how much difference even a small inch can make in a clients satisfaction.

Let's say that you are asked to measure blinds for
three same size windows. Well if you don't have a
tape measure that could be a real pane....

Unless you can improvise with a length of contractors
rope. It's the same as any other rope, but it costs more!

(Cut rope into even professor nightmare lengths)and count them evenly)Simply measure the rope like this
and cut into 3 equal lengths."
Make sure that you do this BEFORE happy hour, or you'll end up with a long one , a medium one and a laughable one."
And.. an unsatisfied client...
At this point it really pays to know magic and you can simply wave your hand like this and they're all even again. I wish I could do that with everything!

Charlie Cabrera
Message: Posted by: C Christian (Mar 3, 2004 07:33PM)
Here is a list of key words or phrazes that you can somehow incorperate via jokes or patter with:

Color blindness
Trading spaces (TV Show)
Fen Shweu (spelling please forgive me Japanese decorating to promote harmony)
Something old looking is an antique
Something new looking is from IKEA
That new marble flooring what's it called... it's suppose to be real cheap... I know Cement!
Has anyone here decorated with T.P.?
After the show would someone like to see my home it could use some work...it's parked right out side the lobby

You get the idea I should be charging for this info!!!
Cheers and let me know if you use any of these!!