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Topic: The spooky, the mysterious and bizarre aftereffects of the eclipse
Message: Posted by: Al Desmond (Aug 22, 2017 02:32PM)
Well we made it through the eclipse here in Bailey, Colorado, without too much trouble.

Our favorite restaurant, the Cutthroat Café, was missing after the eclipse and 13 dogs started barking at the same time and then died, but other than the miscellaneous car alarms going off, we fared rather well.

Rather well, except that most of the townsfolk in Bailey are walking around with a hollow stare in their eyes and the local sheriff deputies keep telling me nothing is wrong (but I saw two pinhole marks in the back of the deputies necks).

Did everyone else fare well?
Message: Posted by: Schaff (Aug 22, 2017 02:43PM)
:) I stood a broom up on its bristles and scared the whole office. Shhhh don't tell anybody that the eclipse didn't change how easy it is to balance lol.
Message: Posted by: weepinwil (Aug 22, 2017 02:59PM)
Nothing of biblical proportions like all the dead rising from their graves, thank God! I'd be destitute if I had to refund all those funerals. However, since the world did not come to an end, I'm filing for a Paypal refund from that televangelist who said that it would. I thought something was fishy when he said it was a sign of the end, the sun would go dark and the moon turn to blood because it hasn't happened like this in 99 years. 99 years, I thought, the same event and we are still here? Anyway, all is well that ends well. Turned out kind of like the Y2K.
Message: Posted by: gostone23 (Aug 22, 2017 03:04PM)
Weepinwil, If they rose from their graves ... wouldn't you get to charge them again for re-burial?
Message: Posted by: weepinwil (Aug 22, 2017 03:51PM)
[quote]On Aug 22, 2017, gostone23 wrote:
Weepinwil, If they rose from their graves ... wouldn't you get to charge them again for re-burial? [/quote]

No. My 'bring 'em Back Alive" guarantee promises a total refund. I guess it wouldn't be a total loss since pre-owned coffins are the rage these days.
Message: Posted by: Yogi2x4 (Aug 22, 2017 11:14PM)
How much would one of those run me?
Message: Posted by: weepinwil (Aug 23, 2017 01:42AM)
[quote]On Aug 22, 2017, Yogi2x4 wrote:
How much would one of those run me? [/quote]

Depends whether you want the rent to own or layaway plan.
Message: Posted by: Sir (Aug 23, 2017 01:50PM)
[quote]On Aug 23, 2017, weepinwil wrote:

Depends whether you want the rent to own or layaway plan. [/quote]

Aren't all burials essentially a "layaway plan"?
Message: Posted by: weepinwil (Aug 23, 2017 02:29PM)
[quote]On Aug 23, 2017, Sir wrote:
[quote]On Aug 23, 2017, weepinwil wrote:

Depends whether you want the rent to own or layaway plan. [/quote]

Aren't all burials essentially a "layaway plan"? [/quote]

At most death imporiums they are but not at the House of Discount Funerals. We have plans that meet every need. Rent to own, Layaway, Double Occupancy. Leasing, and more.
Message: Posted by: Delimbeau (Aug 23, 2017 03:09PM)
Timesharing?
Message: Posted by: weepinwil (Aug 23, 2017 06:01PM)
[quote]On Aug 23, 2017, Delimbeau wrote:
Timesharing? [/quote]
It's the New trend. No one is going to visit after 5 years so why waste space and resources. After 5 years we discard the body and resell the coffin. Its a win win win.
Message: Posted by: Wizard of Oz (Aug 23, 2017 07:56PM)
Rent by the hour?
Message: Posted by: weepinwil (Aug 23, 2017 08:03PM)
[quote]On Aug 23, 2017, Wizard of Oz wrote:
Rent by the hour? [/quote]
The only thing we rent by the hour is the funeral wreath.