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socalmagic Loyal user Los Angeles 267 Posts |
I had an inquiry for a birthday party, and the birthday mom requested that I use the birthday girl in every trick. She also said that if I need another volunteer, that she wants me to use her son every time, and if I need other volunteers that her daughter select them. I feature the birthday child in the opening and closing audience participation routine. It seems like using the same child for the entire show is a little selfish and can greatly impact the quality of the show if they are a difficult or shy volunteer. In addition, I would never let someone else select my volunteers. Is this a common request? I politely declined the show because I thought it would negatively impact the quality of the show, and I am selective about the smaller shows that I book.
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Donald Dunphy Inner circle Victoria, BC, Canada 7563 Posts |
I remember a previous thread on this topic (started Feb. 2006). The discussion got a little heated:
--> Magic Café thread titled... "Onl......y child" - Donald
Donald Dunphy is a Victoria Magician, British Columbia, Canada.
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Mary Mowder Inner circle Sacramento / Elk Grove, CA 3659 Posts |
You did the right thing to decline.
While it is not a given, I'd expect that the children of a Mother that would make such a request might be hard to handle. She is also requesting that every effect include her Daughter or Son as a volunteer. Are all of your effects volunteer effects? Mine are not. You dodged a bullet. The only child that comes up in most of my Birthday shows is the Birthday Child but I make that choice. -Mary Mowder |
dearwiseone Inner circle Portland, OR 1143 Posts |
Yeah, that's a request I've had before. Bottom line...it's your show, you pick the volunteers. It sounds like you did the right thing, especially if you felt it would have diminished the quality of the show.
I also try to make the child the star of the show, but that doesn't mean picking them for every trick. I usually try to feature the birthday child for the opening and closing routine, plus sometimes one more. After that, I'll choose a sibling, and after that, a friend. I sometimes have the birthday child pick the friends who come up, that way, they're still the star, being involved in the picking. Sometimes I have to sell the parent on the idea of not using their child for every trick. I don't think the parents understand how boring it would be to use their child for every single trick, but they're just trying to make their kid the star. They don't mean any harm by it. I tell them that for the some of the routines, their child would have more fun watching it. If they're involved, they wouldn't get to see how funny it looked. I rarely have a parent argue about using their child in every single trick. They usually understand. I would overemphasize the other ways their child would still be the star of the show, without being your volunteer for every single trick! - Kevin |
magicgeorge Inner circle Belfast 4299 Posts |
Never heard that request. I'd have declined too
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MichaelCGM Inner circle Oklahoma City 2286 Posts |
I've never had that request either. The closest I've come is being asked to include the birthday child's sibling "somewhere" in the show - which isn't a real problem. You did exactly what I would have done. Kudos!
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seadog93 Inner circle 3200 Posts |
I would never accept a show on those conditions, and I would be VERY nervous trying to do a show for a family wherein that was even requested!
"Love is the magician who pulls man out of his own hat" - Ben Hecht
"Love says 'I am everything.' Wisdom says 'I am nothing'. Between the two, my life flows." -Nisargadatta Maharaj Seadog=C-Dawg=C.ou.rtn.ey Kol.b |
The Great Zucchini Inner circle 1347 Posts |
What a selfish request by the mom to take away the intuition of the performer to monitor his show accordingly. The child might not even want to be up there every time-I've never gotten this request, but would have turned it down, before she could say the word, 'request'.
I've gotten, 'you make the bday child the star, right', or 'could you bring up a sibling', then the answer is, 'of course'. I don't let the child ever pick the volunteer, because then you have him eliminate most of his class, and it's just my opinion that he picks his favorite, and he then disappoints everyone else, just my opinion. |
MoonRazor Special user 843 Posts |
Every other trick is also a lot of work for the bday kid..... and they don't get to watch much of the show
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jay leslie V.I.P. Southern California 9498 Posts |
AND.... what if, What If the birthday boy or girl is a terrible helper?
What if they are spoiled rotten brats who just want to make your life miserable? I once has grandparents sitting 3 feet away from me, loudly insisting that I keep using the BB. Did I mention they would not shut-up? Did I mention that they loud and interrupted constantly? First I said "I would, but the other children were told that some of them could help." They continued to interrupt NON STOP. Then I said "OK but Billy can't see any of the show if he's standing here the entire time..... Billy. Do you want to see some of the show...(yes) Is it alright if someone else helps so you can have some fun? (Yes)" They continued to interrupt. Did I mention they were louder then my 300 watt sound system? I finally said. "Look here... when YOU pay me.. YOU.. Yes you.. I'll do it... Right now... AND double the agreed amount because this is a special request no one planned for... When YOU give me 500 dollars I will do it.. SOOO Are you going to give me 500 dollars?" (Did I mention they were insufferable?) "So you're not going to pay me... then go in the other room and let the kids have a good time -or- I'm leaving...... Make up your mind... Go - or I'm leaving... Go NOW... Go Go Go... Everyone say the magic word GO." They finally went. IMPORTANT NOTE: Later, the mother apologized and said "If you think THAT was bad imagine what they did to ME, as a kid"
Jay Leslie
www.TheHouseOfEnchantment.com |
The Great Zucchini Inner circle 1347 Posts |
Quote: You took control. Love this story. It's funny every now and then, I ask the bday child if they want to help, and the child will just say, 'no', they'd rather have a good time watching from their seat. This is more than fine, and sometimes you'll will hear a relative go, 'come on Macy', go on up. I will nip that immediately. "Nope, she can watch right from her seat, don't force her'.
On 2013-03-27 14:20, jay leslie wrote: |
Mary Mowder Inner circle Sacramento / Elk Grove, CA 3659 Posts |
Jay, that was rough but it could have been worse...
It could have happened to me. -Mary Mowder |
TonyB2009 Inner circle 5006 Posts |
Jay, well handled!
Check out Tony's new thriller Dead or Alive http://www.amazon.co.uk/Alive-Varrick-Bo......n+carson
http://www.PartyMagic.ie |
Matthew W Inner circle New York 2456 Posts |
I would decline for the simple reason of her picking her friends. If she gets to pick every time, it will make those that she doesn't pick feel less important than whoever she does pick. If I pick, all of her friends stay equal. Let them be disappointed that I didn't pick them and not devastated that she didn't.
-Matt
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jay leslie V.I.P. Southern California 9498 Posts |
Remember......
You CAN NOT pick all the kids.. You might leave a scab! ------------ You can use it, just give me credit. " Why didn't you pick me???" "Because I didn't want to leave a scab"!
Jay Leslie
www.TheHouseOfEnchantment.com |
Payne Inner circle Seattle 4571 Posts |
Quote:
On 2013-03-26 16:20, socalmagic wrote: You should have tried to sell her on the idea of her kid doing the show herself. You could have just dropped off a magic set, collected your fee and then leave them all to their own devices.
"America's Foremost Satirical Magician" -- Jeff McBride.
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socalmagic Loyal user Los Angeles 267 Posts |
Wow Jay, that's a tough gig. Never had anything that extreme. I'm glad I'm not the only one that was uncomfortable with the client's demands.
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jay leslie V.I.P. Southern California 9498 Posts |
And remember, the daughter put-up with those two her entire life.
As I once heard (and what I tell people) Â "I only have to visit....... you have to live with them":)
Jay Leslie
www.TheHouseOfEnchantment.com |
arthur stead Inner circle When I played soccer, I hit 1773 Posts |
Some years ago, I took someone's advice and performed birthday parties by featuring only the birthday child. I marketed the old "Birthday Child the Star of the Show" idea, and picked only the birthday kid to help me (unless they had a sibling, who then participated for only for one of the routines during my show).
Needless to say, I soon realized the advice I had been given was completely flawed. At some shows, even the parents of the featured birthday child got uncomfortable when none of the other guests were being picked as helpers. It was a bogus idea, and I soon went back to selecting other kids as helpers ... while, of course, still making the birthday child the main featured helper. |
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