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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Not very magical, still... » » Corona Smith’s Bitterman Comedy Challenge!!! » » TOPIC IS LOCKED (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

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Corona Smith
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Airstrip One
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Smile Smile Smile



Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls....

We are most excited to be able to present to you a unique and entertaining thread. Consider it a masterclass in the art of comedy.

Corona Smith’s Bitterman Comedy Challenge!!!

Our very own Bitterman will take on all comers and stay awayers, whether they like it or not. No one will be immune from his lance like humour.

If you would like to become the vaunted subject of Bitterman’s scathing wit, then come along, stand out from the crowd, elevate yourself to new zeniths of humility.

For only $5 comedic immortality awaits! Just sign in below with a brief resumé and/or your own feeble attempts at humour (original material only), send me your bucks, and Bitterman will reply.

!!!WARNING!!!
!!!YOU MAY DIE LAUGHING!!!

First person to respond will be given a guaranteed humorous dressing down FREE!!! Yes you read it right! Absolutely FREE OF CHARGE...

After which all persons wishing to be included amongst these hallowed posts should send $5 to corona@rita9.karoo.co.uk (paypal preferred)

So come along! Remember first ones absolutely FREE and guaranteed, to the sum of $10,000 dollars, to be scientifically tested, proof positive of unsurpassable humour the likes of which the planet has never before experienced.

The Small Print.
Anyone wishing to avoid the acerbic admonishments of Bitterman should send the paltry sum of $10 ($5 of which will be generously donated to Steve Brooks for keeping it real!) to the email address, provided below by Bitterman himself, for that very purpose.

LET THE HUMOUR S COMMENCE !!!

Kindest regards,

Corona




:band: Smile Smile
Weatherbee
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Gee....Scathing wit and a dressing down. Why would I want to pay for that? My wife gives me that for free.
Corona Smith
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Airstrip One
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That'll be ten bucks weatherbee!
bitterman
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Quote:
On 2006-05-24 18:58, Weatherbee wrote:
My wife gives me that for free.


Nice set-up like. Like fish in a barrel. Do I even need to say it?


Of course, for five bucks I will
Ten bucks I won't. Smile
If you are not cheating, you are only cheating yourself.

Dutchco is about to put out some new Ebook: DUTCHCO. Get 'em while you can.
coupcoupdaddy
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Corona, would Bitterman donate a humorous dressing down should a declared winner emerge from the Mentalists/Mistresses Dominate Contest in Penny for Your Thoughts Forum?

--Isnot
foreign correspondent, z and lt



inner being worker
Corona Smith
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Airstrip One
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Absolutely, Just link the two threads with our generous offer....

We need the advertising!

Remember Folks, first ones FREE!!!

(we are assuming weatherbee would rather pay the 10 to bitterman)

Try before you buy!

Corona.
coupcoupdaddy
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HOORAY!!!!
foreign correspondent, z and lt



inner being worker
Geronimo
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Hello, I would like to claim the free humorous undressing.

I am a yodelling banjo picking freedom fighter and magician from Yorkshire. Approximately 36 years old, and I've been getting way too big for my boots recently. Just yesterday I replaced one of the towns illustrious monuments with one of myself in a cowboy hat with gun drawn. Please help.

I also hold the world record for the longest raspberry at nine minutes and forty two seconds...

Billy.
Give me back my head!
bitterman
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B Freeman,

Before I begin, I must know; does the number 01443239815 have a special meaning to you? Sometimes my dressing down and other powers get mixed up, but as I thought about you, that number came to me very clearly. Please advise.
If you are not cheating, you are only cheating yourself.

Dutchco is about to put out some new Ebook: DUTCHCO. Get 'em while you can.
Corona Smith
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Airstrip One
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Hmmm,,,

I hope this is going to get funny soon.

Corona
Geronimo
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Quote:
On 2006-05-25 13:07, bitterman wrote:
B Freeman,

Before I begin, I must know; does the number 01443239815 have a special meaning to you? Sometimes my dressing down and other powers get mixed up, but as I thought about you, that number came to me very clearly. Please advise.


Hello, yes they do look familiar.


Is it someones phone number?

B
Give me back my head!
Corona Smith
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Airstrip One
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All this number crunching reminds us of the Master of your own domain mentalist challenge here:

http://www.themagiccafe.com/forums/viewt......5&20

Isnot Liwok has offered one of Bittermans gay ripostes to the winner of that strenuous contest....

Now, back to the topic at hand, Mr. Freeman, Prepare to feel puny!

Corona...
God-glorified
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Corona I'd be glad to send you this 5 dollars yet I still have no idea what we are talking about?!?!?!?
Can someone please depirate the above post?
Ephes. 2:8-9



For by GRACE are ye saved through faith; and that NOT OF YOURSELVES: it is the gift of God: NOT OF WORKS, lest any man should boast.
Corona Smith
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Hi God,

We are just having a bit of fun.

We are now waiting for Bitterman to aim is humour at Mr. Freeman who has volunteered for the free offer above....

Anyone else wishing to volunteer should send $5

Anyone wishing to avoid Bittermans humour should send him $10

we are motivated by a sincere attempt to explore the possibilities of humorous creativity in a world where lots of combinations of words have been used up...So you see its all for a good cause.

I hope that's cleared things up.

Corona
God-glorified
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HAHA thanks Corona all cleared up. And I'm glad its for a good cause. Since it is I was going to donate 1000 dollars to the good will but maybe ill slip the five buck Smile
Ephes. 2:8-9



For by GRACE are ye saved through faith; and that NOT OF YOURSELVES: it is the gift of God: NOT OF WORKS, lest any man should boast.
cinemagician
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Corona, I've been doing so well with the ladies lately that I feel a good dressing down is in order...

After all, the key to is to maintain balance. Why let my current swager cause bumps in the road of karma that undoubtedly awaits?

Is it O.K. to wait 'till the end of the "master of your own domain mentalist challenge" before I send in the fin (that's 5 bucks to all you limey's) Balance is important, but frugality is equally virtueous. I hate to waste the five dollars, considering that with my current winning streak I am bound to win said contest-

Cinermagician Smile
...The best lack all conviction, while the worst are full of passionate intensity...

William Butler Yeats
Corona Smith
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Hi Cine,

We hope you win the masters competitiion, and we don't mind waiting. We hope you can maintain control of your animal magnetism, and achieve the balance you desire...

Meanwhile Bitterman has been spending long hours in deep meditation, to ready himself for this challenge.

He will be along shortly to despatch Mr. Freeman..... I am sure....

There's room for more though folks, just sign in below, and remenber....

For five he will, and for ten he won't ; )

Kind regards, Corona Smith...
bitterman
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Quote:
On 2006-05-25 12:30, B Freeman wrote:
Hello, I would like to claim the free humorous undressing.

I am a yodelling banjo picking freedom fighter and magician from yorkshire. Aproximately 36 years old, and I've been getting way too big for my boots recently. Just yesterday I replaced one of the towns illustrious monuments with one of myself in a cowboy hat with gun drawn. Please help.

I also hold the world record for the longest raspberry at nine minutes and forty two seconds...

Billy.


Sorry for the delay.

I dare say, at 36-ish and still referring to yourself as ‘Billy’, it may be time to take a long look at your life

‘Billy’ is an appropriate name for a small boy, a goat or the coat-tailing spawn of the zero that draws A FAMILY CIRCUS.

Do try to spend less time with the banjo (the instrument of choice for the mildly retarded, here, I refer not to the young, inbred fella from DELIVERANCE, but George Segal) and more time being a loud and proud William!

Hey, what do you want; it was a free one.
If you are not cheating, you are only cheating yourself.

Dutchco is about to put out some new Ebook: DUTCHCO. Get 'em while you can.
Geronimo
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Dear bitterman, Corona and everyone.

I am afraid I have some bad news.
My brother, Billy, has been detained at her majesties pleasure for an as yet undisclosed period. Apparently he is accused of defacing a public monument of some sort. His last words as he was led kicking from the courtroom were instructions on how to access this site and send you his sincere apologies. He is not sure if he will be able to access the net from prison. But would like to thankyou for your efforts. As his older brother I can say you are dead on in your summary of our Billy. He hates being called william.

Yours sincerely,

Sydney Freeman (International Association of Pigeon Fanciers)
Give me back my head!
bitterman
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Had I only acted sooner he might have been saved. Smile

My bad.
If you are not cheating, you are only cheating yourself.

Dutchco is about to put out some new Ebook: DUTCHCO. Get 'em while you can.
The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Not very magical, still... » » Corona Smith’s Bitterman Comedy Challenge!!! » » TOPIC IS LOCKED (0 Likes)
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