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Eddini_81976
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Note, I belong to myspace.com a great site by the way. This was written as a Bulletin to my 190 something buddies which 65% are fans of my magic and watch me street perform. I wrote this to them with a request for feedback. I just wanted to post it here too. Down below I will write after the big space I will write some of my after thoughts advice and my final decision.



"What can I say, I do like doing my Magic, it brings me happiness. It's fun you meet a lot of people and in the Summer it's really the only thing I have. I'm glad I finally got an ad in the yellow pages that way I can be doing tons of hired gigs.

It's just getting me stressed, depressed, and angry dealing with some of the people specifically, the rowdy mean drunks...etc.. The past two weeks I've almost gotten into fights. I fear if it keeps up I'm going to wing up losing my temper and going to jail or something. I mean I'm pretty laid-back, you have to be to do it.

Also not that it's the money I do it for but this summer that part of it has gone down. It's getting to be not worth it no more. I just don't have the passion. I wish I wasn't so sensitive and wasn't the type to get hurt so easily and I try to be thick-skinned it's just not me, nor am I being true to be self. My ideal people to do my magic for, are just good natured people. They don't even have to be good tippers.

Another thing, I'm almost 30, my longest relationship has only been one year. I've had three other one lasting one month, another two months, and one more just three months. I just want to settle down get married and have kids. I want them why I still have the energy to raise them. Doing my Street Magic every weekend night prohibits me from meeting people. Even though I hate the bar / club scene most people, that's how they meet either by parties, bars, or just socializing on the weekends. I've always hoped to meet Ms. Right as I was street performing. It's like a job, and people meet people through work.

It's unfair, street performing has been around for hundreds and hundreds of years. It needs to be kept alive. These days though if someone sees you on the sidewalk performing they think you're a bum, and it's uncool. While yes I do perform for lots of females I think to them, that while they have fun and enjoy it, that they also think it's geeky, and lame and would never be with a street performer. *** it if you go to Boston, or Faneuil Hall it's really big, a big attraction. There you need a video-taped audition though, not that I could get there anyway.

Anyway I'm tired of all the Bull****, I'm sorry for ranting and raving...etc., but I'm just flat out tired. I’m sick of it!!! So if you don't see me out there (which is a very bad shame since I've been doing it for 9 summers and I have a "Following"), I apologize.
I hate to say it but I'm the type of person whereas if I got 99 compliments and one really bad put-down, guess what I remember? The put-down. As I said I wish I wasn't like that and have tried not to be....truth be told I am. Thanks.....feedback appreciated, Ed,
(Eddini)."



Yes last weekend this guy saw me perform the tail end of a set I did for people. After some of the people left this guy came right next to me (and it's not like I can walk away either) and was like "Tell me something. What the **** do you think you're doing ripping the people off in this town?" I told him I wasn't that he saw a crowd around me having fun being amazed. I told him if I was a scam artist why would I have business cards which I pointed out. He was drunk, and yelling "*** your ******* business cards, you should be ashamed...etc.". He them moved across from me, to talk to two guys on the bench who had seen my last set. I overheard (which was easy since he was yelling) "Who down this ******* guy think he is"...and so on. He then got in a cab and left. Then a bike cop and motorbike cop came up to us and asked if we seen this intoxicated guy, blondish hair with a red shirt yelling at people. The two guys said he left in a cab, so I guess I wasn't the only person he harassed. I swear to God though if he would've stuck around someone would've seriously got hurt. Please understand I'm not a fighter, I'll be 30 next month and have only been in like 2 serious adult fights, and I hate fighting and confrontation. People can only take so much. I need mace is what I need. I do carry a small lock-blade pocketknife though. I'd never use unless I was in serious danger, plus knives are to "messy" for me anyways. That was like 9 days ago.

Oh I should say I perform, same place, same time for 9 years now every weekend night from 6PM-2AM. People really know me in the town, and I was in a documentary, and people know it's summer officially when they see me out with my Magic Stand. I've never really had any problems except once in 2004 when that intoxicated guy urinated on my shoes and stuff which I posts here when that occurred. I'm not naive enough to know that I won't have the rowdy mean drunks to deals with, and 95% of the time I let it role off my chest. Unfortunately I'm emotionally very sensitive, and pretty thin-skinned.

Last weekend I performed Friday night, and this one couple who has watched me a few summers now likes to come and give me ****, especially the girl, who can barely walk, she's that drunk. She gets verbally abusive. I was doing Magic for my friends not strangers and they came up. I did some stuff, and I ended doing the Dennic Marks Key Bend (which is a killer method...BTW) for one of my friends. They were like now bend it back. I said that's not how it works. (I never haven’t learned or read what to say when someone asks you to bend something back even though beforehand you say you won't). They're like "It's because you're a phony & and fraud. David Blaine or Chris Angel could do it"....etc.. They left with her yelling calling me a freak, and a fraud as they walked down the sidewalk. My heart was aching. I know, I know you're saying, “why should you care, Ed. What a couple of drunks have to say.” That's just me though. I've tried to be thick-skinned, but I'm being fake when I do that. It bothers me because They the same people always do that for summer(s) now. As they walked away I told my friends to hang tight and I walked like 30 feet behind them for like one block and was like "Hey Brittany, seriously why do you guys treat me like ****, why am I a freak and a fraud?" I was trying to be nice and seriously wanted to know. Being drunk isn't that good of a excuse. They just kept repeating that I was a ******* freak and a fraud. I got ****ed and finally yelled fine ***** don't ever stop at my stand again." I'm just getting tired of getting treated like crap when I'm there to bring happiness, good energy and please my long-time fans. Actually it's my fans that stick up for me. I never really have to say anything my friends and others will tell my hecklers off....lol.

Anyway I had bad dreams that night. I was extremely depressed and agitated. I was still steamed that Saturday night. I went out Saturday night but not as Eddini, I sat on a bench to where I usually set-up. I waited for a good 3 hours because that couple usually goes by there. I was specifically waiting for them. I wasn’t really looking for a fight but I would've had no problem giving them one if they so desired, but I wanted a answer to the question I asked the night before. I won't lie, I was just so angry I just wanted to knock someone the **** out, but I was going to keep my temper (I have one, I've always had a pretty bad temper even as a kid but I have a loooong fuse, but once I lose it, it's pretty bad. I'm not at all bragging and should be better with it. My anger is more toward objects. A example I got kicked out of a place I was living, because I got upset, punched a bunch of holes in my room's wall and tore the door off it's hinges when in a argument with a roommate of mine...it's sad I know. I'm not using this as a excuse but being bipolar "manic-depressive", you can get those bad mood swings) under control, and just ask them to please stop and that it's hurts when they do it. I got bored while waiting.

I went to a pay phone and called my Best Friend /Step - Dad, whom I've known for, for 9 years. He knows me more than any person, and is a confidant for me. Anyway we talked and he "Talked me down". I was upset and was even crying pretty hard for like 5 minutes of our conversation. He told lots I already knew, but I needed to hear. He said that there are consequences, Good and bad. He says that by my choosing to be a street performer I am choosing to make people happy, have fun, make lots in tips but also that I voluntarily open myself up to people who might be threatened or jealous of my talent, drunks, people with a chip on my shoulder...etc. I told him I knew. I said what am I suppose to do, just sit there and take the verbal abuse, and public humiliation...etc. He said, he said to come up with some witty comebacks (which I knew and have been told here too), but I said that can **** them off and they might swing at me. He said fine, but then it would be at least self-defense. He told me that I'm talented that strangers have gone up to him to praise me (they didn't know we knew each other).

He said people all like me, and not to give up. (I was never going to give up magic just street magic. I'm happy this month actually for the first time my name will be in the yellow pages and I'll be doing lots more formal hired gigs). He said he's always been / is proud of me, and commends me for putting myself out there. He says my magic is what I am, and what I do. He was right. He says he knows how sensitive I am, and how torturous it must be for me at times. He said to take a break for a while with the street performing. He said to really go deep inside myself and get my courage to keep street performing. He did say I definitely needed a break from it for a while. He told me I should go out and do something for me that I was getting too stressed. I asked him, what about the being single thing. I hate being single, I always have. I told him after my break when I do start back up street performing, that maybe I should do the two nights every weekend. I said one night I can street perform, and the other night will be a "Meet people night". He said that sounds like a great idea. Also with my add money wise I won't need to street perform as much as I will be making money from gigs. He said yes, "One night do your Magic", and the other weekend night just hang out in my town, and that girls might recognize me and come up talk to me ask me about my magic...etc.. I'm not going to lie, I flirt a lot when I perform, and that's always been my "Ideal way" to meet Mrs. Right as at least I'd know she's like my magic. I hear Jay Sankey has a "How to get Dates By Magic" DVD out, I'd like to buy. Loneliness is a severe cross I deal with. I haven't had a girlfriend for two years now. I just do better when I got a G/F. I have all the way since I was a teen to be married and have kids. I'm kind of a loner though. My church doesn't have a singles group, and really the only time I go out is in the summers when I street perform. I'm to myself a lot, kinda by choice, but not completely. My game plan is to instead of doing my street magic on both Friday, and Saturday Night, I just perform one night, try to meet girls the other. Anyway thanks for reading this and I know people here can relate as I've read posts similar to this. I've calmed down and more centered. Ed, (Eddini).


Posted: Jul 18, 2006 2:50am
-----------------------------------------------
Oh yes, please add me if you have a myspace account. I'd like people I know here as buddies. It's a great site, Ed, (Eddini).
"Treat Others As You'd Want To Be Treated" - Jesus Christ
muzicman
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Eddie, the world is made up of all types. The thing about drunks is they cannot be reasoned with. You can turn some of them around with some great slight of hand stuff but some refuse to budge from their violent/vocal position. Only perform in well lit areas that has lots of people. Watch your back when leaving the area, you might be followed (they know you have money). You can't stop some from watching your act but having great audience skills will hopefully diffuse the situation atleast long enough for you to get help. DO NOT CONFRONT THESE GUYS. Even if you win, you lose. Unless you never plan to perform in that area again. The losers will seek you out days/weeks later and even the score. It's not worth it. Just let it go.
Eddini_81976
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Oh yes, I've been at the same place 9 years. It's well lit in the Center of town. Cops are around on bikes...ect all the time. I always watch my back. So that stuff is cool. You're right some drunks I can turn around. It's just that it bothers me when it's the SAME PEOPLE that do it on purpose. Trust me 99% of the time it DOESN'T bother me and I let it flow off my chest. I hate it especially when it's the SOBER people that bother me. I just take it. I don't say nothing back or have witty come-backs, and as I said my audience and fans are usually the first to defend me. The cops like me and watch my Magic and encourage others to watch me. It's just, that something DID "Snap" in my head the night after, and I wanted to confront that one couple. I wasn't worried as like I said I had my Pocket Knife with me. My message is simple, I'm there to entertain, bring happiness to people, make some money if I can, see my fans, BUT if you **** with me you're liable to get hurt. VERY SIMPLE!!! I'm just tired and am at my breaking point. That's why I'm happy my Yellow Pages add will be out soon. That's why I decided with my Close friend I just need to "walk away from it" till I'm more calm. Then get back into it. Thanks Everyone, Ed, Eddini.
"Treat Others As You'd Want To Be Treated" - Jesus Christ
Bill Palmer
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Eddini.

Two things:
If you decided to be a busker to meet girls, that's not a good thing. Being a busker is a very special thing. If you find one woman who really understands you, then it's fine. But busking isn't being in a singles bar!

Arguing with drunks is a lose-lose situation. You can't reason with them. They have no logic. All you can do is **** them off. Now you might try to model them. Imitate their speech patterns and their gestures. It will either calm them down or **** them off.

I once saw a fellow actually calm a drunk down by modeling him, then changing the modeling he was using. He got the guy to walk out of a room and never come back, without getting him angry.

The key bend is an iffy one. Here's one way to handle it. Have some cards printed up that say, "This entitles the bearer to one key straightening, courtesy of Criss Angel. Fee $500.00"

Or tell them that it will cost them $500 to straighten it out. Then bring out a hammer and an anvil and pound the crap out of it.
"The Swatter"

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My Chickasaw name is "Throws Money at Cups."

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Eddini_81976
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HaHaHa, thanks Bill. Actually I took a package of batteries and pounded it out some. I'm ALWAYS up front in telling them I DON'T bend it back. Normally I'm very non-confrontational. I'm the type with a slow fuse, I'll let people make fun of me, and I'll grin and bare it. RARELY though I'll get pretty upset. EVEN then I take out my frustrations at home. I'm just very thin-skinned. When I went to confront those people the next night I WASN'T with my Magic, or anything. So it would've been just a "Two Person Conflict" in case the police got involved. As far as girls, it actually wasn't me who brought that up at first. Over the years I've had so many guys be like "Dude you must get a lot of girls doing this", when actually it's the opposite. Trust me that's NOT my reason for doing it. All I'm saying is it would be nice and my "Ideal Way" of meeting my future wife. You see doing my Street Performing is the ONLY time I really socialize. I'm not in school, I don't have a 9-5, I don't belong to any clubs, I belong to my church but they don't have a singles group...ect. During the week, I'm at home pretty much practicing my Magic. It would just be ideal because it's important I'm with someone who likes my Magic.

Look at it this way I do it 50% for the love of Magic, 30% to make great tips, 20% to socialize, meet girls and flirt. I am a BIG FLIRT, that I'll admit. As a teen I did meet one girlfriend, I was entertaining at a party and got her number. My Best Friend / Step - Dad who I mentioned above, he gives me GREAT ADVICE. He said after a set if you ever see a girl hanging around to talk to her. Anyway I'm joining that E Harmony.com, so that will help in that situation. Bottom Line I LOVE and have a passion for Magic. I try my hardest to be positive, and make others happy and don't like dealing with drunks or "Just plain old Mean People". As I said I'm not naive enough to know that all crowds will be nice. Remember 2 years ago when I posted about the guy urinating on me and I KEPT CALM...lol. Bottom line I feel more calmer and centered. Thanks, Ed, (Eddini).
"Treat Others As You'd Want To Be Treated" - Jesus Christ
aiki
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I wanted to take some time before I responded to your post so I could digest everything.

I think you are getting a little burned out on the street and you should take a break from the street. Hopefully the advertising will bring in more gigs. Here is an idea, you should look into doing a Fair or Festival type performing for a while. This way you would get a break from the streets but still be performing at something that is very similar to street performing. An added benefit is that the people at the event are there to see performing and should be a better crowd. The down side is that it is probably late to get on with any festival but still do some calling you never know. If you find a festival that you like and could every year this would give you the perfect built in break from the streets. Look and see if in your area there are any trade shows that you could work, this would also use your street performing skills in a new environment.

As far as meeting someone it usually happens through people you know not total strangers per say. That is another benefit of working a festival you can network with other performers and who knows maybe someone has the perfect friend who likes performers that do magic.

Keep your head up and it will work out in the end.
Ray K.

Till we meet again!
Eddini_81976
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Thanks Aiki. Well as far as meeting people through friends, I don't really have any. I don't socialize too much. I'm not into Bars, Clubs...ECT. While LOTS of people know me, and I have MANY Aqaintances, I ONLY really have like two friends I actually visit. My Best Friend whose like a Step-Dad to me is 60 years old. I've had friends but they move away...ECT and don't keep in touch. I have NO friends that are girls. Being on Disability for my Bipolar (Manic-Depression), I don't have a 9-5. Also I'm not in college. I'm looking to maybe get a 2 year degree in psychology. I do have a few online friends. I've met so many girls via the internet that I KNOW we'd hit it off right. The problem is, is they live far away. In the Winter it's worse and my lonliness is worse. I just want babies really bad. I want marriage really bad, and even though I'm 30, I want kids while I still have the energy to raise them. People say "Well you'll meet your life mate when you're not looking". I disagree. You have to meet people for things to happen. People also say "You'll meet your life mate when you are out there doing what you love". I agree with that to a point. Anyway LITERALLY the ONLY time I meet girls or just even socialize is in the summer when I'm street performing. Okay this example is a little extreme, but imagine you are in prison for 5 days a week (though my prison is kind of self-imposed), and they let you out on the weekends, OF COURSE your response to females and female attention will be much higher than let's say you see them, socialize with them everyday. I just have very few interest, so except my Magic (IBM which sadly is all males "Listen girls get into magic", ALERT...ALERT) I'm not in any clubs. I have very little money too, so that doesn't help a lot. Hopefully my add will have in the yellow pages will help that. Also EHARMONY.COM will help the other situation. As far as the Magic, I'm terrified of talking into microphones. If the trade shows were close- that'd be okay. I'm a Cose-Up, Magician / Mentalist. Also I've never owned a car. So all my gigs will need to be close by. Thanks to everyone, Ed, (Eddini).
"Treat Others As You'd Want To Be Treated" - Jesus Christ
The Mighty Fool
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I'll Agree with the esteemed Mr. Palmer that busking is not a singles bar. In all my travels & street-magic performances, I HAVE met lots of women, but you'll never attract Ms. RIGHT.....only Ms. WEIRD. Seriously, there are girls who see what youre doing & figure that mabye youre strange enough that you'll tolerate THEIR brand of bizzare-ness. I've never met a female conjuror,(on the street that is) but these gals usualy do have some sort of art in their ability. I've met up with bellydancers, ballet-rejects, 'angry' musicians, gurners (look it up), sidewalk artists, and mimes. Never never NEVER date a mime. They LOOK silent, but when theyre not performing, they make up their lost talking-time on you. My god this girl (the mime) was unbeleivable...talktalktalktalktalk...I used to have to go outside the hostel just to THINK.
Everybody wants to beleive.....we just help them along.
Eddini_81976
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HaHaHa, my perfect ideal girl would be a great Catholic (Christian) girl, who is kind, tender affectionate, a romantic, understanding, big into starting a family, likes kids and animals, and who IS ALSO A MAGICIAN. I've always thought that would be so cool. I got to tell ya, Lance Burton was lucky. He used to be married to Melinda (Or is it Belinda). She's VERY pretty and seems very sweet and genuine...lol. Oh well I got faith that God will put whoever in my life soon, I hope. Thanks, Ed, (Eddini).
"Treat Others As You'd Want To Be Treated" - Jesus Christ
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[quote]On 2006-07-20 10:14, aiki wrote:

I think you are getting a little burned out on the street and you should take a break from the street. "


I agree. It sounds like the longer you stand out there, the more bitter your head gets. I was the same way. For 4 years straight I spent every single weekend lugging my act around to different houses for kid's parties. Towards the end I was snapping at kids, my ability to handle restaurant hecklers turned into snappy aggressive comments, and I started to despise magic. I stopped. I haven't done a kids party in over 2 years. I haven't done restaurant work in over 2 years. I dove so deep in magic I couldn't breathe. And most importantly, girls only saw me as a novelty, not a person. It tore me apart when the only thing they could say about me was "he's really good at magic".
I relaxed. Did routines for myself, competitions, and my respectful friends.
I grew to love magic again. Grew to enjoy performing again. And I reemerged with a new style, old confidence, and new rules for myself that will never let that happen again.

Drunks = Humanity's rats.

Don't burn out. Its a long road to getting the fire re-lit.
TheWhiteye
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Although...

I met my current girlfriend at one of my friend's concerts. They asked me to open their show with some magic. Unprepared, I randomly walked up to her and asked her for a condom which I used to snort into my nose and out my mouth as the opener for my act. We're going on 8 months now. She's fantastic and still seems to be normal, but I still don't know who would find that attractive.
Dannydoyle
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Street work when done right, is quite tough.

First off it has been said drop the singles bar attitude so nuff said.

Second and more importantly the thing to realise about"street magic" (not its new definition, the old one) is that you deal with the public with NO barrier.

What I mean is in stage work the obvious barrier of the stage exists, even in comedy clubs, and believe it or not close up work there is a certian "distance" where you are the professional performer. Now drunks often cross this line, and sometimes rude people too, but indeed for you ther is no "official" reason for your being where you are.

You therefore are far more accessable to taunts and nonsense. You don't deserve them, but that is a fact. The "barrier" is gone. Your just a guy on the street doing magic. So if I am drunk and stupid, (wow what a combination that is to behold) then YOU are going to suffer.

Here is a secret. PEOPLE SUCK. Not all people but think this of enough people to keep your guard up, your skin thick and your eyes open. Your burned out is all. Go at it fresh, take a vacation, your gonna be fine.
Danny Doyle
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Lee Darrow
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Quote:
On 2006-07-20 19:27, Eddini_81976 wrote:
HaHaHa, my perfect ideal girl would be a great Catholic (Christian) girl, who is kind, tender affectionate, a romantic, understanding, big into starting a family, likes kids and animals, and who IS ALSO A MAGICIAN. I've always thought that would be so cool. I got to tell ya, Lance Burton was lucky. He used to be married to Melinda (Or is it Belinda). She's VERY pretty and seems very sweet and genuine...lol. Oh well I got faith that God will put whoever in my life soon, I hope. Thanks, Ed, (Eddini).


Son, you need to be booking Church socials, not busking, then. Honest statement, not a criticism.

As several others have pointed out, you do seem to be a bit burned out on the street and maybe a break is in order. Also, it has been a VERY hot summer all over this Great Nation of ours and that also does several things, too: it tires a person out faster than bad shoes will and; it brings out the strange-oids in droves!

From your posts, you seem to have found a strange-oid herd trail, and it's going right through your pitch!

Maybe a relocation to the other side of the square (or whatever) might help - you know, better feng-shui, more positive vibes, slightly different crowds and, a different perspective on the place you are working from can do wonders for you, the audiences and your hats.

Just a thought... which are a rare thing inside this pint of blue much sloshing around inside my skull these days!

;)

Lee Darrow, C.H.
http://www.leedarrow.com
<BR>"Because NICE Matters!"
magicsoup
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You seem to be burned out. If you want a christian girl go to a christian church! Not just for a girl but for the other things a church can offer. Things like fellowship with like minded christians. Do some things outside of magic to get a little grounded. As a christian I'd say go to church and get involved. Other people might tell you to volunteer somewhere. Do something! Also if you went to a good church a pastor or priest might be a good person for you to talk to. I sounds like you need someone to talk to sometimes. A real person might be better than an internet friend.
Eddini_81976
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Wow what great tips. I'm involved with a church, there just isn't a singles group. It's okay though it helps my relationship with God which is the most important thing. My belief is ANYTHING is possible. I've been performing the past two weekends and they were great, especially last weekend. It renewed my faith in Street Performing. I had lots of crowds and was going for more than a hour at one time. Also I got some myspace URL'S from some nice ladies and they're on my friend list, and we've been communicating. I made great tips, I flirted a lot. I'm well known for flirting and they flirt back so it's all appropriate. I'm doing much better now. I got a few drunks but as I said MOST OF THE TIME their comments don't bother me. I LOVED last weekend. Awesome Tips, Great crowds, even better FEMALES...lol, Ed, (Eddini).
"Treat Others As You'd Want To Be Treated" - Jesus Christ
aiki
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Remember,

Life is good!
Ray K.

Till we meet again!
EggMan
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Hi Ed, just read your post. Mr Palmer and Mr Darrow has given you great advice and I hope things work out well for you.

One thing I'd like to add is this: the fact that you've been performing at the same place for the past 9 years takes a lot of patience and discipline. Have you tried performing for private events as well? These events usually have better well-behaved guests.
Lee Darrow
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You mention that your church has no singles group. Just a thought, but you might want to talk to your pastor about STARTING one. As a social adjunct to the parish, it can be a very rewarding thing to do and it can also give you a chance to perform FOR them from time to time as well as take advantage of the ability to socialize with like-minded people!

Another idea is to look into the Fellowship of Christian Magicians in your area, if there is one (see the forum for them here on the Café' for contacts) and network that way as well. Maybe set up an FCM Busking Night on your pitch!

Just a thought... or three...

Lee Darrow, C.H.
http://www.leedarrow.com
<BR>"Because NICE Matters!"
Eddini_81976
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Those are good ideas especially the Christian Magician one. On another note whether I'm performing or not I always use Magic as a Ice Breaker as I'm a bit shy, so I'm "always on". I do Magic on my bus, when people ask, or when I meet new females outside the context of performing. I just like doing Magic a lot. Thanks, Ed, (Eddini).

P.S. I finally got my phonebook with my ad in it, and it looks great.
"Treat Others As You'd Want To Be Treated" - Jesus Christ
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