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threecardmonte Loyal user 278 Posts |
I am doing a routine with a mechanical chicken and I'm looking for a couple good lines/jokes about chickens. Anybody have any?
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thoughtsexplorer Elite user Elite... not D-Lite! 424 Posts |
You could name it "Col. Sanders"
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thoughtsexplorer Elite user Elite... not D-Lite! 424 Posts |
"one of his siblings... been to Mexico... forgot to put on sunscreen" (darker rubber chicken - which should normally not be used anywhere in magic...)
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thoughtsexplorer Elite user Elite... not D-Lite! 424 Posts |
"always visits chicken roasteries to watch the naked boys/girls"
Sorry, but you did not explain to which sex your chicken belongs or which preferences it has... |
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honus Veteran user 354 Posts |
What kind of routine and for what audience?
Something I've always wanted to do (yeah, I'm nuts ) is a collection of answers to "Why did the chicken cross the road?" Possibly along these lines: Why did the Republican chicken cross the road? All the chickens on his side got kicked out of the coop in November. Why did the Democrat chicken cross the road? He doesn't know, but at least he's not a Republican chicken! Why did the magician chicken cross the road? They were selling a new self-levitation on the other side. Why did the fried chicken cross the road? Like, to pick up some Chee-Tos, man. Why did the baseball-playing chicken cross the road? To catch a fowl ball. Okay, I apologize for that last one. |
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joseph Eternal Order Please ignore my 17407 Posts |
Quote:
On 2006-12-06 11:26, thoughtsexplorer wrote: I heard he kicked the bucket.....
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
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Corona Smith Inner circle Airstrip One 1689 Posts |
What's the difference between a chicken?
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Bill Ligon Inner circle A sure sign of a misspent youth: 6437 Posts |
Why did the chicken cross the road?
She didn't want to lay it on the line.
Author of THE HOLY ART: Bizarre Magick From Naljorpa's Cave. NOW IN HARDCOVER! VIEW: <BR>www.lulu.com/content/1399405 ORDER: http://stores.lulu.com/naljorpa
<BR>A TASSEL ON THE LUNATIC FRINGE |
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Bill Ligon Inner circle A sure sign of a misspent youth: 6437 Posts |
Quote:
On 2006-12-06 15:15, Corona Smith wrote: Ok, what's the difference? (I have an answer, so I'll show you mine if you show me yours. )
Author of THE HOLY ART: Bizarre Magick From Naljorpa's Cave. NOW IN HARDCOVER! VIEW: <BR>www.lulu.com/content/1399405 ORDER: http://stores.lulu.com/naljorpa
<BR>A TASSEL ON THE LUNATIC FRINGE |
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Corona Smith Inner circle Airstrip One 1689 Posts |
One of its legs is the same!
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Julie Inner circle 3936 Posts |
For a child's birthday party> Why did the chicken cross the road?
To come to Billy's Birthday Party--and here he is! (Introduce your chicken here.) Julie |
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amazingboz New user 67 Posts |
The chicken crossed the road for a new perspective of the road kill
AmazingBoz |
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harris Inner circle Harris Deutsch 8812 Posts |
I have a wonderful sound activated chicken that dances and has music for the chicken dance. It starts out slow and gets faster each of the 3 or 4 times it plays.
I use is as a running (and unexpected gag) with a juggling routine. It is also part of my loose weight program...and was much easier in my "younger chicken daze." During the routine I tell the audience his first name is Colonel.. His last, I ask...Most shout Sanders.... It's not...! Harris
Harris Deutsch aka dr laugh
drlaugh4u@gmail.com music, magic and marvelous toys http://magician.org/member/drlaugh4u |
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Patrick Differ Inner circle 1540 Posts |
Why did the punk rocker cross the road?
He was safety-pinned to the chicken. Ever hear the one about the three-legged chicken?
Will you walk into my parlour? said the Spider to the Fly,
Tis the prettiest little parlour that ever you did spy; The way into my parlour is up a winding stair, And I've a many curious things to show when you are there. Oh no, no, said the little Fly, to ask me is in vain, For who goes up your winding stair -can ne'er come down again. |
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The Sorcerer New user 57 Posts |
Why did the dinassaur cross the road? Because chickens weren't invented then!!! lol
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coupcoupdaddy Inner circle 2466 Posts |
Dinosaurs closer to chickens in Giger Count. Mechanical birds are not without mythological merit. Perhaps you purchased an emperor's nightingale for a song on line and received Balm of Gilead and your present possesssion. Perhaps it was your only toy as a child. What do mechanical birds seek?
foreign correspondent, z and lt
inner being worker |
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Patrick Differ Inner circle 1540 Posts |
Mechanical birdettes.
Will you walk into my parlour? said the Spider to the Fly,
Tis the prettiest little parlour that ever you did spy; The way into my parlour is up a winding stair, And I've a many curious things to show when you are there. Oh no, no, said the little Fly, to ask me is in vain, For who goes up your winding stair -can ne'er come down again. |
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SeaDawg Special user The Lunatic Fringe 718 Posts |
Depending upon the age of the crowd...
Do you know the difference between erotic and kinky? Erotic uses a feather, while kinky uses the whole chicken...
Crazy people take the psycho-path thru the forest...
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Magic Enhancer Inner circle Robert Haas 1805 Posts |
Could produce the chicken from an empty can of campbells chicken noodle soup. I don't know.
Haas
Robert Haas
Magic Enhancer Quality magic products for the working professional. www.MagicEnhancer.com |
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thoughtsexplorer Elite user Elite... not D-Lite! 424 Posts |
Better: produce the chicken that has a wig made of noodles!
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