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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Now that’s funny! » » Business license jokes (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

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NJJ
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Inner circle
6439 Posts

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"We now HAVE to have a business license to busk here. Which is good and bad. The bad news is I now have tons of paperwork, red tape and bureaucracy. The good news is....I can take credit cards" and pull out a credit card swiper.

"Street performers now have business license, beggars collect sales tax and that dog needs planning permission just to p*** on that hydrant."

"I am SUPPOSED to have a business license to perform here but stuff that! I am claiming this space as new country. Welcome to People's Democratic Republic of Joe Joe. Our chief export is entertainment, our chief import is your money and national anthem is Living on a Prayer/Abracadabra/*** the police/any funny song you like."

"I am supposed to have a license to perform here but I found out the hunting license is $20 cheaper then the business license. So the show is the same its just that I am legally bound to shoot, gut and skin one of you."

"I am supposed to have a license to perform here but I found out the fishing license is $20 cheaper then the business license. The show is the same its just that I am legally bound to throw back any little ones! Nothing under $5 folks!"

"I have to have a license to perform here. Why do I need a license? They only thing I drive away is audiences!"

"Ladies and Gentlemen, the government has told me I HAVE to get license because I am engaged in commerce. Which means anyone who doesn't put money in my hat is STEALING!"

"This is my business license. It's just like a driving license. They are stressful to get, hard to study for but...if you don't have one someone might get killed!"
jocdoc
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Carlsbad, CA
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Wow - someone was feeling very productive tonight. These are excellent!

jeff in san diego
Life is an improv. The game goes on...
The Awesome One
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Gold Coast, Australia
174 Posts

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Quote:
Munch did not paint "The Scream" wondering if the public would approve of it or not.

Maybe so, but I'm pretty sure he didn't paint it while shoving his silly idealogical rants done the throats of passerbys.

Good luck with the court case, I think you will need it.

By the way Nick, those lines are fantastic.

Adam
Win if you can, lose if you must, but always cheat.
NJJ
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6439 Posts

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One of the goals of art is to be able to express emotions and thoughts in a way that words can not. By creating an 'aesthetically pleasure' vehicle for your opinions, you can communicate them to the audience without just ranting.

"This my business license! that's right folks! I can escape from handcuffs, ropes and chains but I can escape red tape!"

"This piece of paper tells you all that this is a business and that I am a business man. If that's true then the pimp working the corner down there must be corporation"
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