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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Now that’s funny! » » Car Commandments.... (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

harris
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Harris Deutsch
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Any others not mentioned in the decree?

1. Though shall not say it was yellow
2. Thought shall not say I was just trying to say(sign language) he was # 1
3. Parting of the red sea...does not give you inspiration and license to go between to Red Trucks
4. add yours here...
Harris Deutsch aka dr laugh
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music, magic and marvelous toys
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Lyndel
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wrote the theme to the TV show COPS!
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Thou shalt carry jumper cables...

Thou shalt not drive a hunk of junk that breaks down in front of my car at the drive-thru...

Thou shalt not ask the officer if he's that guy from the Village People...


Lyndel
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BSutter
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Sitting on a pile of
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Quote:
On 2007-06-22 11:06, Lyndel wrote:

Thou shalt not ask the officer if he's that guy from the Village People...

Lyndel


Okay. You got me. Smile

Bill
harris
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Harris Deutsch
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Excuse me Ocifer.....

aside anyone see the puppeteer with the Village People as Puppets Dancing..

Priceless...

Harris
Harris Deutsch aka dr laugh
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music, magic and marvelous toys
http://magician.org/member/drlaugh4u
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
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Thou shalt not play thy Ipod so loud that other people can hear it.
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
Eric Buss
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Thou shalt not pull onto a freeway doing 20 miles an hour.
Patriot
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Thou shalt cut two inches off of the tailpipe of your new car...oh wait...that's the OTHER guys! My bad! As you were...
Josh Riel
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of hell
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Thou shalt knoweth the on ramp to the freeway is where you accelerate to freeway speed, not once you have entered the freeway causing the guy behind you to have to curse your very existence.
Also, in the name of everything holy, you need not slow down almost to a stop to get on the off ramp, for the Devil causes you to do stupid things like that, jerk.

If thou hast a cell phone in one hand and looking for whatever stupid thing you dropped while steering with your leg and making others hate the fact that procreation was allowed in another set of commandments, please take the next opportunity to leg steer your car into a ditch.

Also, simply because I am stopped beside you on my motorcycle, I do not necessarily want to race. Sorry add "Though Shall" somewhere there.

If you are a woman driver who insists on continuing being one, please just be careful. There are kids out there.

Also, If thou are my wife, please, for the love of god, just because the cell phone rings you don't have to sacrifice everyone in the car and neighboring ones to dive for the phone hidden in your purse under the seat, the back seat.....

Amen
Magic is doing improbable things with odd items that, under normal circumstances, would be unnessecary and quite often undesirable.
Justin Style
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(If you are a NYC driver) Thou shalt stay out of the fast lane on route 80 in NJ.

(If you're a chick) Thou shalt not apply eyeliner, smoke, talk on the phone and scream at the kids in the back seat, WHILE DRIVING.

Thou shalt not flip me the bird just because I am cursing you out for being a BAD driver.


more to come...
Josh Riel
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I would venture this commandment 80% of all drivers shall not do so.

Selah
Magic is doing improbable things with odd items that, under normal circumstances, would be unnessecary and quite often undesirable.
styck13
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Quote:
Thought shall not say I was just trying to say(sign language) he was # 1

Whereas this as already been mentioned once, we did this subject on the radio last week.. one of our listeners worded it perfectly.

"Thy lord shall be the only one to fly birds"
Father Photius
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Oh yes , nearly forgot,
Thou shalt not turn up the base on ur car sound system so high that it is breaking out the windows of cars two blocks away.
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
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