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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Now that’s funny! » » Gag tag (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

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NJJ
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200. 1 to change the bulb and then other 199 to keep the car running.

Where do pirates but their patches?
harris
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Harris Deutsch
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With there heads...(that is if you did mean but not put...

Why did the pirate become a magician?
Harris Deutsch aka dr laugh
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music, magic and marvelous toys
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magicgeorge
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Belfast
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To learn to control his own deck.

What do you get if you cross Nick Johnson with a sea-food restaurant?
Professor Piper
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Well 'BATtered' fish and chips...

What do you get when you mix Lemon juice with water?
"Nemo has been found! He was on an Admiral's Platter at Red Lobster!"
Dan Paulus
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Utah is isolated from the real world by
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Minute Maid lemonaid.


What's the diffence between Carot Top & Gallagher?
There is no great genius without a mixture of madness. - Aristotle
Aristotle

www.danscomedymagic.com
calamari
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The San Francisco Bay Area
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About 20 years...


what do you get when you cross a Carot Top with a Gallagher?
"I came, I saw, SHE conquered." (The original Latin seems to have been garbled.)
Professor Piper
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A better act.

What do you get when you cross George Carlin and Richard Pryor?
"Nemo has been found! He was on an Admiral's Platter at Red Lobster!"
honus
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A flaming hippie.

What do you get when you cross Jim Callahan with Criss Angel?
magicgeorge
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Belfast
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An intergalactic marshmallow.

How many pickled peppers did Professor Piper pick?
harris
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Harris Deutsch
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He lost count after drinking the juice!

Where do you get Kansas Juice?

(aside...I love it when the next question ties into the thread and keeps it going.....OCD except cleaning....Harris)
Harris Deutsch aka dr laugh
drlaugh4u@gmail.com
music, magic and marvelous toys
http://magician.org/member/drlaugh4u
magicgeorge
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Belfast
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In a Kansas Synagogue

How many owls does it take to mend a hovercraft?
Professor Piper
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One, with a message to the Acme Hovercraft reparo service.

(Hic)

How do you tell if a pepper is pickled? (Hic)
"Nemo has been found! He was on an Admiral's Platter at Red Lobster!"
magicgeorge
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Belfast
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His shades keep slipping down his nose.

How do you tell if a pickle is peppered?
harris
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Harris Deutsch
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There is a report of an a Salt.

Why did Goshman use Salt Shakers?
Harris Deutsch aka dr laugh
drlaugh4u@gmail.com
music, magic and marvelous toys
http://magician.org/member/drlaugh4u
magicgeorge
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Belfast
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They were in season.

How do you know if a monkey has stolen your bicycle?
Professor Piper
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By the faint sound of accordian music coming from down the block...

How can you tell that your elephant is having her 'monthly'?
"Nemo has been found! He was on an Admiral's Platter at Red Lobster!"
NJJ
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All the sheep are red


(ewwww. I even disgusted myself)

Why is a raven like a writing desk?
Professor Piper
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Because your loose change disappears everytime it gets close to it....

(ewwwwww, I was disgusted myself....LOL...My anwser? Your mattress is missing and there is 50cents on the dresser)

The "100 Year War"....Elaborate.
"Nemo has been found! He was on an Admiral's Platter at Red Lobster!"
Corona Smith
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Airstrip One
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....was apparently a direct result of the 100 Year War.



What is the most effective solution to the problem of Global Warming?
Rupert Bair
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?
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Save trees from Cats

Why was the cat saving the tree?
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