A banana walks into a magic convention loudly shouting ...who stole my rain coat..

Mac King says..Rain Coat..Schpain Coat..who didn't steal my material...

Why do magicians often use stolen material?

Because they need the extra time to buy more magic tricks they will never ever use.

Why was a banana wearing a rain coat?

He found it more appealing? (oh, vey, that's a bad one).

When the moon hits your eye _______________


Edd

...You better have REALLY good insurance. =)

Why were the Keebler elves hired to make cookies?

The did a great "Elves" imitation during the job interview.

"Elves" is now leaving the tree. Tis the season to make bad puns fa la la la la la la la la...Oy to the world good retail toward men..(and women and puppets)"
_____
What do you give an elf that has everthing?

A cookie that has nothing.

What did the worm say to the bird?

Haven't we done this joke already?

A dog walks into a school and says _______?

Edd

OUCH. Maybe I need glasses. =)

So there's a magician and Elvis sitting at a table ........

Elvis said.."I thought you were dead".

What did the electric guitar say to the ace of clubs?

"Hey.. I think I may have played at your CLUB before." I know groan. lol

The top 3 reasons why anyone should become a magician are.....

Have cool friends, get free stuff, and can get rich as sh*t. Not very funny, but those are great reasons. How can I make this funny so I feel like I've donated...ummmm...a magician crosses a road and the bar man says ouch.

How can you tell the time with a lime?

I can't, so I phone the speaking clock with my banana.

Quasimodo walks into a bar.....

And says do you know me? The bartender says not quite, but your name rings a bell.


Why does magicgeorge look like Harpo Marx?

Because his mother loved the Marx Brothers.

What did the curly hair say to the straight hair?

Edd

There's nothing wrong with being straight. (inspired by an old Seinfield episode)

Why is this thread moving up and down in this section of the Café?

Cause some of us just have No LIFE! lol

What do you give a magician who has everything?

Penicillin. If you're recycling your questions I'm recycling my answers.

What did Santa say when he trod on an elf?

Next time remember which jokes you already put up on the gag Tag thread. lol

why do reindeer fly?

It's too far to walk.

Why is Santa's sack so full?

Because mrs claus is going through menopause.

what did the woman say to the hot flash?