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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Now that’s funny! » » Gag tag (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

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magicgeorge
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Belfast
4299 Posts

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Harris, don't send me any Valentine gifts.

How many lightbaulbs does it take to screw in a Cheetah?
harris
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Harris Deutsch
8663 Posts

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One Green One that is fast and an energy saber.

Why do so many magicians sport goatees? (beards)
Harris Deutsch aka dr laugh
drlaugh4u@gmail.com
music, magic and marvelous toys
http://magician.org/member/drlaugh4u
Rupert Bair
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?
2075 Posts

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They used to support lambs, but it was a sheepish sport.

How do lemons ask for the time?
Lyndel
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wrote the theme to the TV show COPS!
1623 Posts

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They don't, they just "squeeze" stuff into their schedules...


Why did Lyndel cross the road?
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magicgeorge
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Belfast
4299 Posts

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To see if it was as much fun as the chicken said it was.

What's a biscuits favourite novel?
harris
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Harris Deutsch
8663 Posts

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Seabiscuit by Hillbrand.

What is the ventriloquist favorite brand of cereal?
Harris Deutsch aka dr laugh
drlaugh4u@gmail.com
music, magic and marvelous toys
http://magician.org/member/drlaugh4u
magicgeorge
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Belfast
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Oeetagix and nilk.

What do you call a mule with 5 ears?
harris
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Harris Deutsch
8663 Posts

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A very corny animal.

Why didn't the puppet like to eat his vegetables?
Harris Deutsch aka dr laugh
drlaugh4u@gmail.com
music, magic and marvelous toys
http://magician.org/member/drlaugh4u
Dan Paulus
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Utah is isolated from the real world by
343 Posts

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He's just being difficult, you know, with that stick up his arss.

What's the difference between dark and hard?
There is no great genius without a mixture of madness. - Aristotle
Aristotle

www.danscomedymagic.com
magicgeorge
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Belfast
4299 Posts

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It gets dark in the evening and hard in the morning......

What's black and white and blue all over?
harris
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Harris Deutsch
8663 Posts

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A depressed Zebra.

Why was the inmate depressed?
Harris Deutsch aka dr laugh
drlaugh4u@gmail.com
music, magic and marvelous toys
http://magician.org/member/drlaugh4u
nucinud
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New York, New York
1295 Posts

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Because Martha Stewart was getting out.


What does a cherry do on his day off?
"We are what we pretend to be" Kurt Vonnegut, jr.



Now U C It Now U Don't

Harry Mandel

www.mandelmagic.com
magicgeorge
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Belfast
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Get stoned.

How do you get an elephant into a phonebox?
Rupert Bair
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2075 Posts

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Put a mini in there first.

What did the dyslexic fire eater say to the duck?
nucinud
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New York, New York
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Are you a member of M.A.D (ducks against dyslexia)?

Two dyslexics walk into a bra and say..
"We are what we pretend to be" Kurt Vonnegut, jr.



Now U C It Now U Don't

Harry Mandel

www.mandelmagic.com
Rupert Bair
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2075 Posts

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Can you smell gas? and the other says "I can't even spell my own name"

What does santa get for xmas?
NJJ
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Overtime

What did the bottle say to the horsefly?
Magic Enhancer
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Robert Haas
1805 Posts

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How did you get wings and horsehoes?

What happens when Fraggles do drugs?
Robert Haas
Magic Enhancer
Quality magic products for the working professional.
www.MagicEnhancer.com
Lyndel
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wrote the theme to the TV show COPS!
1623 Posts

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They get violent and attack muppets...

What do you get when you cross David Copperfield and a chick from Seattle?
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Flying Magus
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286 Posts

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Rumors!

Why doesn't Copperfield fly coach?
Magically yours,

Michel Fouché
Believe in the Impossible
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