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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Now that’s funny! » » Gag tag (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

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wizardofsorts
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Hillary Clinton has actually performed several magic tricks.

The best part of January is?

Edd
Edd Fairman, Wizard of Sorts is a corporate magician available for your next trade show, hospitality suite, client luncheon, or company event. http://www.wizardofsorts.com
harris
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Harris Deutsch
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U or Y

What puts Edd out of sorts?
Harris Deutsch aka dr laugh
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magicgeorge
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Belfast
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His yearly sort out.

What puts Harris out of shorts?
wizardofsorts
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His yearly performance at the "Sun bathers club."

If a magician were elected president, his first action would be?

Edd
Edd Fairman, Wizard of Sorts is a corporate magician available for your next trade show, hospitality suite, client luncheon, or company event. http://www.wizardofsorts.com
magicgeorge
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To start a post about it on the Café.

What's the best thing to feed a baby rhino?
Magic Enhancer
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Robert Haas
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A bad magician.

What did the magician say to the spectator after he accidentally slammed his hand onto a spike during the Smash & Stab?
Robert Haas
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harris
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Harris Deutsch
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AFLACK


What was Harris' opening effect at the New Reformed Temple. (after Friday Night Shul and the traditional Chinese Buffet)?
Harris Deutsch aka dr laugh
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wizardofsorts
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Temple Screen? Temple of Baneras? Coin Star of David? Multiplying menorah? (I could go on...)

A clown car gets into an accident. The police arrive and the officer exclaims ___________!

Edd
Edd Fairman, Wizard of Sorts is a corporate magician available for your next trade show, hospitality suite, client luncheon, or company event. http://www.wizardofsorts.com
harris
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Harris Deutsch
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Send out the Clowns...

Where does the Clown clean his Clothes?
Harris Deutsch aka dr laugh
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magic4u02
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Eternal Order
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In Tide.. cause it is much to cold Out Tide.

Why does a juggler always steal the show at a magic convention?
Kyle Peron

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magicgeorge
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Because their the only ones that can get away with a balls up.

(geez, that was weak)

What did the DVD say to the VHS player?
magic4u02
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What does VHS stand for... Very Hard to Sell?

What are the top 3 things you should do at a magic convention?
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wizardofsorts
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1. Make a planned to be booked at a gig that weekend next year.

2. Go prank the Trekkie convention.

3. Learn a new trick, because God knows we each need to know more tricks!

The writers strike will end when ____________ promises to never _____________ again.
Edd Fairman, Wizard of Sorts is a corporate magician available for your next trade show, hospitality suite, client luncheon, or company event. http://www.wizardofsorts.com
magicgeorge
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AMPTP/PPDMBA

What's the difference between a helium filled cow and Alfred Hitchcock?
harris
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Harris Deutsch
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The Profile and one does not make cameo appearances in their films.

Why did the puppet say the cow was for the Birds?
Harris Deutsch aka dr laugh
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magic4u02
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Because he figured the cow was eating like a bird when he realized he as using Low COW dressing.

(ok ok that was a bit of a stretch... yet still funny. hehe)

Why did the cow stare at the scarecrow?
Kyle Peron

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wizardofsorts
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He was contemplating the human condition.

Sam Kinison, Lenny Bruce, and Richard Pryor walk into an afterlife bar...

Edd
Edd Fairman, Wizard of Sorts is a corporate magician available for your next trade show, hospitality suite, client luncheon, or company event. http://www.wizardofsorts.com
wizardofsorts
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Ok, well I guess my 12 hours are up. What happen, those names scare everyone?

So here is my answer to my own gag.

...and the bartender says, "Welcome to Salt Lake City."

New gag:
Apples next product release will be?

Edd
Edd Fairman, Wizard of Sorts is a corporate magician available for your next trade show, hospitality suite, client luncheon, or company event. http://www.wizardofsorts.com
magic4u02
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Ok Edd I guess I am really dumb here but I did not get the Salt Lake City line? hehehe Must just be me lol

Apples next product release will be the iCrate. It doesn't do anything but is a nice plastic bin to throw all your other outdated Apple products in. It will cost them $2 to make but will sell for only $299.99.

If an apple a day keeps the doctor away.... what does a pineapple do?
Kyle Peron

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wizardofsorts
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Kyle, none of their material would play in Salt Lake City so they must truly be in Hell.

Answer to Kyle's gag:
Keep Pine trees away.

If doctor's are afraid of apples what are worms afraid of?

Edd
Edd Fairman, Wizard of Sorts is a corporate magician available for your next trade show, hospitality suite, client luncheon, or company event. http://www.wizardofsorts.com
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