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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Now that’s funny! » » Gag tag (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

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Father Photius
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Grammar Host
El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17198 Posts

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About half as many as you can fit into a bungahigh.


Why did the magician sell his dog?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
Mr Rubiks
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Regular user
134 Posts

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He didn't like his "style".

What do you call a frustrated escape artist?
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17198 Posts

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Someone who can't escape his predicament.

Why do magicians insist on vanishing Elephants?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
Mr Rubiks
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134 Posts

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They own an oversized trunk.

Why did the magician cross the street?
MagikDavid
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Cincinnati, OH
298 Posts

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He wanted to 'play chicken' with the traffic.

What did the mentalist say when he woke up from a coma?
One good thing about being wrong...
Is the pleasure it brings to others.
Eric Woods
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Kansas City
115 Posts

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Would you hand me that sealed envelope please.

Why did the magician fire his assistant?
MagikDavid
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Cincinnati, OH
298 Posts

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She was REAL ugly... I mean REAL, REAL ugly. (she looked like her face was on fire and someone put it out with a rake!!!)

Why did the magician turn down a paid show at the casino?
One good thing about being wrong...
Is the pleasure it brings to others.
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17198 Posts

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Because his assistant was REAL ugly...I mean REAL, REAL ugly. (she looked like her face was on fire and someone put it out with a rake!!!)


Why did the magician's assistant have plastic surgery?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
magicgeorge
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Inner circle
Belfast
4299 Posts

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Because his assistant was REAL ugly...I mean REAL, REAL ugly. (she looked like a wellington boot melted onto the side of a bucket!!!)

What's pink and green and lives in france?
JRob
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Central South Carolina
395 Posts

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The magician's assistant that was REAL ugly...I mean REAL REAL ugly (she looked like she fell out of an ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down)

How many magicians are going to milk that "Real ugly assistant" punchline?
"Jim Roberts, AKA: Professor Jay Rob "<br>
The Professor's Facebook Page
MagikDavid
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Cincinnati, OH
298 Posts

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Three magicians... #1 - A magician who has a real pretty assistant, #2 - A magician who has an even uglier assistant, and #3 - A magician who is jealous because he doesn't have an assistant.

Why did the magician fire his BLONDE assistant? (here we go again.)
One good thing about being wrong...
Is the pleasure it brings to others.
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17198 Posts

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Because his assistant was REAL ugly...I mean REAL, REAL ugly. (she looked like her face was on fire and someone put it out with a rake!!!)

Why did magicgeorge marry her?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
JamesTong
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Eternal Order
Malaysia
11209 Posts

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Even though the BLONDE assistant was REAL ugly...I mean REAL REAL REAL REAL ugly but she looks appealing to HIM!

Why are magicians assistants suddenly became ugly and they have to be fired?
Eric Woods
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Kansas City
115 Posts

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I don't know but I think I started it (kind of, but not really
It's all MagikDavid's fault).

Why did the magician refuse to put his assistant back together?
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17198 Posts

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She was easier to pack and move in parts.

Why did the magician always insist on a penthouse suite?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
MagikDavid
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Cincinnati, OH
298 Posts

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Because he knew that his UGLY assistant wouldn't be allowed in. (She would have to stay at a Motel 6.)

Why does magicgeorge insist on staying at a Motel 6?
p.s. Eric started it.
One good thing about being wrong...
Is the pleasure it brings to others.
Father Photius
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Grammar Host
El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17198 Posts

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Because he was always a tight man with a dollar.

Why did the rabbits eat the magician?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
JRob
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Central South Carolina
395 Posts

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They had just watched "Night of the Lepus" and thought it was a documentary

Why the magician deliberate hire a really ugly assistant?
"Jim Roberts, AKA: Professor Jay Rob "<br>
The Professor's Facebook Page
flobiwan
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Regular user
165 Posts

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Because she threatened to divorce him if he didn't.



Why do pigs have curly tails?
Doctor Zolar
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Regular user
El Paso TX
131 Posts

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2 answers:
1. For miss-direction.
2. So the scars she gets from splinters from inside illusions would not show.


(Some of these are actually getting funny again.)

Why did the Jewish Magician have a short wand?
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