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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Now that’s funny! » » Gag tag (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

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JamesTong
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Eternal Order
Malaysia
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He can't use it anymore. It's gone ... poof ... vanished.

Why did the magician use silks for his performances and not towels?
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
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Because nobody ever heard of 20th Century Towels and Towel to egg.

How many nickles does it take to do a 5 quarter assembly.
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
JamesTong
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Malaysia
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It must be the same number that is needed to do the assembly using dollars.

Why do most magicians stopped at 4 balls when they are doing the multiplying balls trick?
joseph
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There were only 4 policemans balls going on at the time...
What did the escape artist due in prison?...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
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Kept impressing the guards by breaking into his cell.

Why do so many magicians like to wear straight jackets?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
JamesTong
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Their wives did that so they don't spend more money on magic.

Why did the magician compete in magic competition?
joseph
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He wanted to perform zombie and linking rings...
What did the magician put in his zombie ball?...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
JamesTong
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An electronic self inflating giant balloon and the confetti cannon for his zombie finale.

What did the magician do when his zombie ball cannot be levitated at all?
jay leslie
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V.I.P.
Southern California
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He performed it on that exposure show the best way he knew how.

How many magicians does it take to screw in a Zombie Ball (of the original Karson prototype, type)?
JamesTong
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The consultant (so that it is done the right way)
The metalugist (sp) (so that the ball will not be dented)
The Zombie ball maker (so that he gets the credits if it is done correctly)
The critique (so he can blame everyone)
The Café readers (so they can laugh over the incident)
The performer (he decided not to perform the zombie ball as it is too difficult to screw in the ball)

How many magicians does it take to perform the zombie ball in a magic convention?
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
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Every freaking one of them.

How many magicians does it take to do the invisible deck?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
JamesTong
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Only the magician who thinks he is invisible can handle the invisible deck fairly well.

Why do they call it the invisible deck when it is so visible and can be seen by everyone?
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
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Because the magician is blind to what he is doing.

What did the magician really carry in his top hat?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
Bill Ligon
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Inner circle
A sure sign of a misspent youth:
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His top.

Is the invisible pass easier with an invisible deck?
Author of THE HOLY ART: Bizarre Magick From Naljorpa's Cave. NOW IN HARDCOVER! VIEW: <BR>www.lulu.com/content/1399405 ORDER: http://stores.lulu.com/naljorpa
<BR>A TASSEL ON THE LUNATIC FRINGE
MagikDavid
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Cincinnati, OH
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Yes... However, the invisible pass is easiest with no deck at all.

Is a stripper deck pornographic?
One good thing about being wrong...
Is the pleasure it brings to others.
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
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I've heard a few obscenities when someone is using one.

Why did the magician take a dose of laxative before every show?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
MagikDavid
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Cincinnati, OH
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He wanted to be the 'HEADliner'

Why did the magician cancel his show at the maternity ward?
One good thing about being wrong...
Is the pleasure it brings to others.
JamesTong
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Malaysia
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He want to receive his 'awesome' award from Fr. Photius who's the President of the prestigious Café-aholics Anonymous Club.

Why did the magician decided to add the mask changing act to his performance?
Bill Ligon
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Inner circle
A sure sign of a misspent youth:
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He looked into a mirror.

Have you ever been hypnotized by your Svengali deck?
Author of THE HOLY ART: Bizarre Magick From Naljorpa's Cave. NOW IN HARDCOVER! VIEW: <BR>www.lulu.com/content/1399405 ORDER: http://stores.lulu.com/naljorpa
<BR>A TASSEL ON THE LUNATIC FRINGE
joseph
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Sometimes for a short period, sometimes for a long period...
Why is it sometimes called the naked zombie?...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
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