Qualified to learn Fr. Photius' shrinking beard trick.

Why is Fr. Photius keeping the secrets to his beard trick series so tight and have never release them yet?

Because the spandex gown he is wearing is too tight.

Why did all magicians grow beards after watching Photius' act?

It is the cheapest prop in town. No money is spent in growing beard. But the magicians do not realize that the secrets to the beard act lies in the pink spandex gown.

Why did Fr. Photius not reveal that his FISM winning trick is the orange growing beard (the oranges just bloom from his beard)?

Because "Thou shall share" was the only part of the Bible he missed reading.

What did Photius say when he won the contest with color changing beard?

I should have included my twin doves from the colored beard.

When would Fr. Photius start giving his beard act lectures?

He doesn't need a "beard", he's straight

Why doesn't James Tong grow a beard?

When he starts loosing his hair.

How much will Photius charge us for his color changing beard lectures?

Interference.

That's a 10 whisker penalty, isn't it?...

How did the amateur magician perform anything from the "Professional Rope Routines" DVD? Do Cannibal Cards taste funny? Why did the waiter put the table's bill in a lemon? Is it possible for a magician to produce electric card fans? Did you see K. Reeves do his Matrix routine? Do Mexican magicians use English pennies as well? Do chop cups have a sharp blade in them to slice and/or dice? What does a magician do if your chosen card is lazy and refuses to be ambitious? Does it matter to anyone that I am apathetic towards my apathy? Do decks blush or simply change colors? Did you hear about the magician who went to see the movie "Revenge of the Zombies" as he thought it had something to do with Tim Wright, Dale Salwak and Neil Foster? Do you lose money when you recycle a coin in bottle? We already have card on ceiling, why not have ceiling fans? I love Romaine lettuce.

I like Romaine Lettuce too.

(Sorry guys, but all the beard tricks are not really mine, I stole them all from Eugene Burger).

Why did the magician line his chop cup with mayonaise?

He followed the wrong set of instructions.

Why did the magician decide to use cabbage as his cups and balls final load?

Because he was Korean and decided he found a way to write off his Kim Chee as a business expenxe.

Why did the magician try to feed beans to his rabbit?

He ran out of carrots.

Why did the magician not pull the fake rabbit out of the hat by its ears?

Because it was a real rabbit doing it's imprssion of a fake abbit

Would anyone perform the 101 chopcups to beard trick?

Only Eugene DynaBurger would try that one.


How many printers does Dynamike have to use to print out a copy of each of his posts in just one hour?

He can not afford a printer, so he writes them out by hand.

What color will Photius look better in if he changed the color of his beard?

I was always partial to the color Aqua.

What did Dynamike do when he reached into his pocket for a sponge ball and all he found was Fig Newtons?

Threw them out to his homeless family in the audience.

What trick made Kyle forget about this forum?

Forgetful Freddie...

Why did the crowd laugh and walk away from the hypnotist?...