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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Now that’s funny! » » Gag tag (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

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MagicBus
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Inner circle
Kalamazoo, Michigan
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Because his stage name was "MagicBob The Tomato", teamed up with Larry the Cucumber. Or Larry the Cumberbun. Or Larry Lujack. Because it was a natural finish to his Nielson vanishing Ketchup bottle. Because his last audience was throwing beer bottles at him. Because he was a really big weiner. Because he was doing a Halloween night show and this was supposed to look like blood. Because he was going to be a vegetable for the rest of his life. That he was a few tomatoes short of a bloody mary. That he was doing his show at a farmer's market. That he was a few fries short of a happy meal.

What did Tom Burgoon do at the gas station when the bathroom (or washroom as they say in Canada) was out of toilet paper?
Father Photius
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Grammar Host
El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17158 Posts

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He hypnotized himself into believing there was toilet paper.

Why did the magician sell his ring and rope routine to a Norwegian bachelor farmer?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
joseph
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Eternal Order
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Isn't it good, the Norwegian would..(buy it)?

Why did the Norwegian need this effect?...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
JamesTong
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Eternal Order
Malaysia
11213 Posts

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To impress the magician who happens to be Nani Darnell

Why did the magician try to befriend Nani Darnell?
joseph
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He wanted Mark's autograph..

Why did the magician dive off the stage?...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
MikeHMagic
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1007 Posts

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She put a spell on him

What is an Irish magician's favorite trick?
Mike "Gus" Harvatt
"Bullwinkle that trick never works."
MagicBus
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Kalamazoo, Michigan
2763 Posts

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Tipping his bartender with flipper coin by accident.

Why did Curly's Bar in Colon serve the magician an extra large drink?
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17158 Posts

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Cause once they got him drunk they didn't have to pay him to perform.

Why did the magician perform the baffling bra on his Mother-in-law?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
joseph
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It was his breas.. best trick...

Why did the magician perform at the funny farm?...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
JamesTong
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Malaysia
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The Lotta bowl with over flowing milk.

What idea did the magician came up with when he saw some folks milking the cow at the funny farm?
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
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That he should milk this gig for all it is worth.

Why did the magician fail at the color changing hard drives trick?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
JamesTong
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Malaysia
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His hard drives crashed on him.

Why did the magician insist that he is the masked magician?
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
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Better a bad reputation than no reputation at all.

Why was the masked moron overlooked as a Supreme Court nominee?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
JamesTong
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Malaysia
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Morons cannot be norminated.

Who do you think is the real person behind that masked moron?
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
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No question about it, J. Edgar Hoover.

Why do magicians drink diet coke?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
MikeHMagic
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Because they don't make diet Guiness

what happened when the magician tried to juggle his dove, rabbit and trained circus poodle?
Mike "Gus" Harvatt
"Bullwinkle that trick never works."
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17158 Posts

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The act went entirely into the dog.

Why did magician's assistants always wear red lipstick?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
joseph
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He didn't want it to clash with his purple lipstick...
Why did the magician spike his hair?...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
JamesTong
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Malaysia
11213 Posts

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He didn't want his assistant to look taller than him.

Why did the magician stopped wearing tail coats for his acts?
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
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Because he had a short act.

What did the magician say when he reached into his pocket and didn't find the load that was supposed to be there?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
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