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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Now that’s funny! » » Gag tag (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

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MikeHMagic
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GURK!

Why did the kid show magician produce an emu @ the showcase for library performers?
Mike "Gus" Harvatt
"Bullwinkle that trick never works."
Dynamike
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Eternal Order
FullTimer
24098 Posts

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Because that would be the last place PETA would look to find it.

What did the magician say to the lady who was about to go in labor during his show?
joseph
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"It's ok dear; I'll drive you to the hospital after the show."..

Why did the magician stop performing the zig zag illusion?...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
MikeHMagic
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Because he switched to blunts

Why did the magician ride the bus to his kiddie birthday party show?
Mike "Gus" Harvatt
"Bullwinkle that trick never works."
jay leslie
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Southern California
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His drivers license was "SUSPENDED"

Why do magicians like to drive and practice at the same time?
Father Photius
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Grammar Host
El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17197 Posts

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Because they know that move is going to kill them one way or another.

Why did the assistant fill the magician's socks with oatmeal?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
JamesTong
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Malaysia
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To get back at the magician for not paying her salary.

Why did the magician still wants to be a professional magician when he is jobless most of the time?
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
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It beats working.

Why did the magician paint all his props yellow?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
MagicBus
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Kalamazoo, Michigan
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You never heard of Magic Squarepants SpongeBob? Old Kellar, I mean Old Yeller? Because Arthur Trace already painted all his props black and white? All yellow props makes the canary vanish a lot easier...

Why does Brett Daniels in his Myrtle Beach billboards claim he is "America's Greatest Magician?" Did Father Photius retire?
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
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Fr. Photius has been retired for years, but Dynamike only sold me the rights to that title about 10 minutes ago.


Why did the magician fill his pockets with vanilla pudding?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
Dynamike
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To set up a trap to catch the grammar host that was cheating him.

Why did the grammar host not follow the rules?
joseph
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Because he made them up...

Why does Brett Daniels look like a wax figure?...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
MikeHMagic
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Because if he was a plaster figure he'd crack up at all these funny lines

Why did the crappy kid show magian call himself the maste rof the dark arts?
Mike "Gus" Harvatt
"Bullwinkle that trick never works."
joseph
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Because he can only do sleight of hand in the dark...

Why did the magician perform at the car dealer showroom?...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
joseph
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He liked double undercutting people...

Why did the magician drive the car blindfolded?...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
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It was less scary than actually seeing the way the other drivers were driving.

Why did the magician flee across the border?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
MikeHMagic
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To join the mexiacn flee circus

Why did "Rainbow" the clown date "The Master of the Dark Arts"?
Mike "Gus" Harvatt
"Bullwinkle that trick never works."
Sixten
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Floral Park, NY, U.S.A.
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He got caught, cheating @ "Shoot-Out Poker"*

*(For the Garcia & Schindler fans)

Why did the magician get stage-fright?
Sixten
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Floral Park, NY, U.S.A.
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Too late! Delete the above. Smile
magicgeorge
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Belfast
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They wanted to try something scarey that they hadn't done before (In answer to both questions)

How many frogs make a bucket?
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