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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Now that’s funny! » » Gag tag (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

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Father Photius
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Because they actually ran out of ideas after 3 pages.

If 10 monkeys on typewritters can eventually produce the complete works of Shakesphere, then why can't a dozen magicians on computers produce a handful of decent jokes?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
MikeHMagic
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Because they're not stoned

Why did the clown own an Emu?
Mike "Gus" Harvatt
"Bullwinkle that trick never works."
joseph
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He was stoned..

Why did the magician wear shorts with his tux?...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
Father Photius
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Because he was a midget.

Why did the magician invest in pork bellies?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
joseph
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He liked to ham it up a bit..

What did the magician make out of 5 animal balloons?...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
JamesTong
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My name ... James

Why did the magician call himself a magician when all he does is make balloon animals?
Father Photius
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Because he is a blow hard.

Why did the magician run his dove pan through his rabbit wringer?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
JamesTong
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He wanted to see howa flatten dove pan looks like.

Why did the magician think the TAOM convention is a gathering for Taoist monks?
MikeHMagic
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He was James Tong

Where did the mentalist go for Yom Kippur?
Mike "Gus" Harvatt
"Bullwinkle that trick never works."
MagicBus
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Kalamazoo, Michigan
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Beit Shalom of Kreskin.

Where did the magician ask the tatoo artist to place on his body the tatoo picturing him performing his Abbott's Florabella?
JimbosMagic
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On his thumb tip.


what did the tatoo artist put on the magicians hands.....
JIMMY CARLO. KIDabra International Family Entertainer of the Year 2009.
IBM Triple Award Winner. Uk Champion of Comedy Magic.
Represented the UK in the United Slapstick Awards on German TV.
European Children's Entertainer of the year 2007/8
Bill Ligon
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A sure sign of a misspent youth:
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A pair of gloves.

Why did the tattoo artist want to cover up his latest pictures on the magician's hands?
Author of THE HOLY ART: Bizarre Magick From Naljorpa's Cave. NOW IN HARDCOVER! VIEW: <BR>www.lulu.com/content/1399405 ORDER: http://stores.lulu.com/naljorpa
<BR>A TASSEL ON THE LUNATIC FRINGE
joseph
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He wanted to use up his old ink..

What trick did the tattoo artist show the magician?...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
Dynamike
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Needle Thru Arm.

When is a magician not a magician?
JamesTong
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When he is jobless.

Why did the magician paint his face green?
JimbosMagic
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He wanted to perform the blendo head routine.

Why did the magic wand break?
JIMMY CARLO. KIDabra International Family Entertainer of the Year 2009.
IBM Triple Award Winner. Uk Champion of Comedy Magic.
Represented the UK in the United Slapstick Awards on German TV.
European Children's Entertainer of the year 2007/8
JamesTong
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It is the break-away-wand.

Why did the magician use a table that is painted bright pink?
Father Photius
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So he could conceal a pink elephant behind it.

Why did the magician sell his magic wand for a screwdriver?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
MagicBus
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Kalamazoo, Michigan
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He had drank too much Pepto Bismo so he wanted to become a Phillips Screwdriver.

How many black speckled vests does an overweight magician (like myself) have to buy to have an adequate performance wardrobe? (Or, in the alternative, Why do magicians always wear black?)
JamesTong
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Black color is better than pink.

Why did the magician use 12 white silks for his fountain silks?
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