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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Now that’s funny! » » Gag tag (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

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Father Photius
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Grammar Host
El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17158 Posts

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He wanted to get the jump on his audience.


Why did the magician go on a diet of sardines and pancakes?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
JamesTong
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Eternal Order
Malaysia
11213 Posts

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That's because he was paid in sardines and pancakes.

Why did the magician want to work for anything?
joseph
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Please ignore my
17503 Posts

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It was better than nothing..

What did Santa get Julia Child for xmas?...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
JamesTong
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11213 Posts

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All those things written in her list.

Why did Santa decide to become a magician?
joseph
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The elves were slowing down..

What trick did Mrs. Santa like best?...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
Bob Sanders
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1945 - 2024
Magic Valley Ranch, Clanton, Alabama
20503 Posts

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Miser's Dream followed by shoe shopping.

Why does peppermint have red and white stripes and no blue?
Bob Sanders

Magic By Sander / The Amazed Wiz

AmazedWiz@Yahoo.com
joseph
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17503 Posts

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Blue paint tastes funny..

What did the magician find under his xmas tree?...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
JamesTong
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Malaysia
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A BIG list from his wife reminding him of his chores he has not done yet.

Why did the magician like his wife to nag him all the time?
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17158 Posts

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Because he was fond of horses.


How did the magician's wife run in the Kentucky Derby?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
JamesTong
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In a funny way.

Why did the magician's wife wants to be a magician?
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17158 Posts

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Because she thought she could make money disappear faster than her husband.


Why did the magician wear a nylon stocking over his head while performing?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
MikeHMagic
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Inner circle
1007 Posts

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He couldn't see thru the wool one

Why is Santa so jolly
Mike "Gus" Harvatt
"Bullwinkle that trick never works."
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17158 Posts

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Because he alone knows the secret to the illusion of how he gets down the chimney.

Why is it hard to vanish a reindeer?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
Bob Sanders
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1945 - 2024
Magic Valley Ranch, Clanton, Alabama
20503 Posts

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The spots shine through the silks.

Why do you not save deer feet for good luck?
Bob Sanders

Magic By Sander / The Amazed Wiz

AmazedWiz@Yahoo.com
JamesTong
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Eternal Order
Malaysia
11213 Posts

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Because they are not white.

Why did Santa want to lose weight this year?
Bob Sanders
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1945 - 2024
Magic Valley Ranch, Clanton, Alabama
20503 Posts

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He heard that shoppers were trimming back.

Why isn't Santa afraid of the dark?
Bob Sanders

Magic By Sander / The Amazed Wiz

AmazedWiz@Yahoo.com
JamesTong
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Malaysia
11213 Posts

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Because he has a big supply of D'lites with him all the time.

Why did Santa deliberately miss the magician's house?
Bob Sanders
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1945 - 2024
Magic Valley Ranch, Clanton, Alabama
20503 Posts

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He was afraid of vanishing chimneys.

Why don't Easter Bunnies go down chimneys?
Bob Sanders

Magic By Sander / The Amazed Wiz

AmazedWiz@Yahoo.com
MikeHMagic
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Inner circle
1007 Posts

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That's Santa's turf

Why did the clown war a Santa suit?
Mike "Gus" Harvatt
"Bullwinkle that trick never works."
JamesTong
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Malaysia
11213 Posts

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They do not want to mess up their pretty fur coats.

Why did the magician jump up happily when it started snowing?
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