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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Now that’s funny! » » Gag tag (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

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Bob Sanders
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Grammar Supervisor
Magic Valley Ranch, Clanton, Alabama
20504 Posts

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He was burning to work on "Waist Not; Want Not"

Why don't magicians believe there is one end of the month?
Bob Sanders

Magic By Sander / The Amazed Wiz

AmazedWiz@Yahoo.com
Father Photius
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Grammar Host
El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17161 Posts

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Because no magician knows how to make ends meet.


Why did the magician stuff his zombie ball with tuna fish?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
Bob Sanders
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Grammar Supervisor
Magic Valley Ranch, Clanton, Alabama
20504 Posts

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He thought a sail fin would help.

Why did the magician wear an electric bow tie?
Bob Sanders

Magic By Sander / The Amazed Wiz

AmazedWiz@Yahoo.com
Father Photius
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Grammar Host
El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17161 Posts

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To lighten up his act.

Why did the magician sit on a hot stove?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
hbwolkov
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Inner circle
2947 Posts

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He always wanted to perform with a fire wallet.

Why did tha magician do to the post office?
Northern California
Dynamike
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Eternal Order
FullTimer
24148 Posts

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He sent Dynamo a ton of fan mail.


What did Photius do when the government took away his computer keyboard?
Bob Sanders
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Grammar Supervisor
Magic Valley Ranch, Clanton, Alabama
20504 Posts

Profile of Bob Sanders
He applied for disability!

Why does a clown have a round nose?
Bob Sanders

Magic By Sander / The Amazed Wiz

AmazedWiz@Yahoo.com
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
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It helps him roll better when he falls on his face trying to be a magician.

Why did the magician increase his cholesterol intake?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
Bob Sanders
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Grammar Supervisor
Magic Valley Ranch, Clanton, Alabama
20504 Posts

Profile of Bob Sanders
There was nothing he wouldn't do for a plack.

Why are magicians not allowed to have carry-on luggage?
Bob Sanders

Magic By Sander / The Amazed Wiz

AmazedWiz@Yahoo.com
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17161 Posts

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Because it attracts too many vultures.


Why did the magician stuff sponge balls up his nose?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
Bob Sanders
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Grammar Supervisor
Magic Valley Ranch, Clanton, Alabama
20504 Posts

Profile of Bob Sanders
He knew his music was "If My Nose Was Running Money, I'd Blow It All On You" and the wrong gal was in the audience.

Why don't they have "Lite Buttermilk"?
Bob Sanders

Magic By Sander / The Amazed Wiz

AmazedWiz@Yahoo.com
Father Photius
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Grammar Host
El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17161 Posts

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Because the led batteries keep corroding in the acidity of the buttermilk.

Why do magicians not like flush toilets?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
joseph
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Eternal Order
Please ignore my
17381 Posts

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They are used to saving all their cr*p for their shows..

Why did the magician use polar bears for his act?...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
Father Photius
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El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17161 Posts

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(ROFL, you stay up all night thinking of these, don't you , Joseph)

Because they worked cheap for fish.


Why did the magician's assistant sell all of his secrets?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
Bob Sanders
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Grammar Supervisor
Magic Valley Ranch, Clanton, Alabama
20504 Posts

Profile of Bob Sanders
His non-secrets were worth even less.

Why do so few magicians drive Jeeps?
Bob Sanders

Magic By Sander / The Amazed Wiz

AmazedWiz@Yahoo.com
Father Photius
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Grammar Host
El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17161 Posts

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Because the concept of 4 wheel drive is beyond the intellectual cognitive capacity of most of them.


Why did the magician wash his rabbit in gasoline?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
joseph
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Eternal Order
Please ignore my
17381 Posts

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He had some left over from when he siphoned his neighbors tank..

Why will the magician busk at the Super Bowl?...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
Father Photius
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Grammar Host
El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17161 Posts

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Because he got a $3,000 a night bill from the Arlington motel 6.


Why did the magician study Judo?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
Bob Sanders
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Grammar Supervisor
Magic Valley Ranch, Clanton, Alabama
20504 Posts

Profile of Bob Sanders
Some don't run fast enough to get away after the show.

Why is it that in a restaurant a magician's table will have as much under it as on it?
Bob Sanders

Magic By Sander / The Amazed Wiz

AmazedWiz@Yahoo.com
Father Photius
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Grammar Host
El Paso, TX (Formerly Amarillo)
17161 Posts

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Because they are all sloppy eaters.

Why did the magician wear a topit to the buffet?
"Now here's the man with the 25 cent hands, that two bit magician..."
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