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Sealegs
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Inner circle
The UK, Portsmouth
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Can anyone point me to a source for where I might find some examples of comedy psychic readings? (I've made a search here on the Café and not turned anything up)

The sort of thing I'm getting at could include the:

" I'm picking up certain things from you.... I believe you know of an elderly person that has died.. you once had a pet....." ......sort of thing.

But would more interestingly (for me anyway) be of the:

" ....you like disecting small animals, you sometimes dream of trampolining naked with Dr Ruth... and you have an irrational fear of the mahogany and teak" .... sort of thing.

Or maybe you have your own examples you'd be happy to share?

Writing my own I find the line between being; surreal, daft and funny..... and.... surreal, daft and not funny is easily stepped over if not careful.

Cheers Neal
Neal Austin

"The golden rule is that there are no golden rules." G.B. Shaw
magicgeorge
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Belfast
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Ha, I like that idea. I haven't seen it done before so hopefully there will be no examples and you can write it all yourself!

When it comes to surrealism do you step over a line or back over it? Maybe just charge at the line and see how far you get.

On the other hand, if you try too hard to be surreal it becomes contrived. A good exercise is to write it as fast as you can and never reject your first idea. For example for the irrational fear line the first thing I thought of was lemonade, it's not as clever as mahogany and teak but for some reason it strikes me as more amusing.

When I was doing a fake papparazi walk-around act my favourite ad-lib was "is it true you strangled a weasel with your bare hands?". I don't know why I found that hilarious but I kept it and ask it fairly regularily at inappropiate occasions.

So here I go I'm going to write the first bunch of crap that falls into my head:

You were born with 3 nipples two real ones and one magic one that people can only see if they look at your chest and cross their eyes.

You will meet a dark and handsome penguin you will mistake it for a very small nun but by the time you realise it will be too late and you'll be in love and treking across the antartic with Morgan Freeman rabbiting on in the background.

You find interesting and attractive people interesting and attractive.

You have a penchant for wearing rabbit's feet as earings and like the taste of whale snot.

When you where younger you had a pet tortoise that you didn't know existed. He lived in your fridge and ate your lettuce. He hated you and sometimes spat in your pudding.

You cry at starange things such as newspaper cuttings, badger cruelty and being poked in the eye with a twig.

When you were younger you were smaller.


Hmm, mostly rubbish, but if you write like that for half an hour you'll probably get a couple of things from it.

George
calamari
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Elite user
The San Francisco Bay Area
429 Posts

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Writing as George suggests:
relax relax clear your mind... I am getting the sense that you are easily coerced into doing stupid things other people tell you to do. (if female this could be a jumping off point to other more sugestive comedy)

you were almost certainly not your parents favorite child or they just had a really weird sense of humor.

something most people don't know about you is that you are (insert what ever)

(if female) I am picking up something you are concerned over and you really can't tell they are not both the same size... especially since you ware the same size shoe on both.

you will meet a tall dark stranger... unfortunatly he will mug you.

you will become world famous and an intire disease will be named for you.

I predict you will have several, I'm just not quite sure on what...

it's clear now yes I see it crystal clear... look up and take a step back.

I think these all suck but it was fun trying.
"I came, I saw, SHE conquered." (The original Latin seems to have been garbled.)
nathanallen
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Des Moines, Iowa, USA
522 Posts

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Quote:
On 2008-06-10 04:36, neal austin wrote:

"...you sometimes dream of trampolining naked with Dr Ruth..."


How... did... you... know... that... ?...
Nathan Allen, The Maniac of Magic
www.maniacofmagic.com

To buy a prop is nothing.
To write a good routine is something.
To really entertain an audience is everything.
Flying Magus
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You have an irrational distrust of psychics.
Magically yours,

Michel Fouché
Believe in the Impossible
nathanallen
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Des Moines, Iowa, USA
522 Posts

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It's a rational distrust.

I was even curious enough to fork over $100 to attend a "gallery" type group-reading (TV style, only without the cuts and edits).

Pretty sure the prick lied to us.
Nathan Allen, The Maniac of Magic
www.maniacofmagic.com

To buy a prop is nothing.
To write a good routine is something.
To really entertain an audience is everything.
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