Here are a couple of videos of an act of mine I've been hesitant to post publicly. It's the same act, filmed a couple weeks apart with minor tweaks (I have a video of the original version somewhere that's vastly different, I may post that eventually just to show the evolution of it).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X5hwvvu3X2M
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=evz-BVkEtJo

Let me know what you think.

Josh,
I watched both and it certainly has potential, but does seem like it needs some tweaks. There seemed to be some "dead-air" moments and some of the jokes didn't seem to get much of a laugh. So maybe work on the lines a bit more?

I'd drop the "100% cat meat" joke, for example. That might be a bit too crude and the cat/chinese joke is too easy. You could even hear a woman say "ewwww" during the second performance. Maybe a play on the idea of being hungry again after eating Chinese? Something like "the coolest thing about doing a magic trick about Chinese food is that in about an hour, you're all gonna be hungry for more!". Well, maybe not that verbatim, but something like that might show more creativity than just saying "100% cat", ya know? And it will be less offensive to cat lovers and Chinese people in the audience!

Also, maybe the fotune that you find in the envelope, could say something funny on it or something more significant - I think you just said "my lucky numbers are 17, 26, etc" in the second video. Or maybe if you DID want to use a cat joke (sorta), you could read the fortune as "oh look, it's a fortune, it says 'THAT WASN'T CHICKEN'" This way, you imply the old cat joke, without actually saying it.

I also think you should place your money envelope on a small stand, so it remains visible to the audience during the entire act. When you lay it down flat, the audience's eye level is below the table top. So as far as they know, you could have 14 enevelops laying on the table. So I think a small stand would be very aesthetically beneficial to the whole performance.

When you are adding up the prices, why not involve the audience? Ask the whole audience to help you, because your math is bad. Name each price and let the whole audience yell out the total as you go. This would get more involvement from everyone, as well eliminate the slowness of adding it up yourself.

Just some ideas, take care.

Danny,

Thanks for the input. That was the first time I put the jokes in the act, so I was still testing the waters, and I'm still working out the kinks with the "dead air." (It's a lot harder to play on stage like that than it is to a small group tablehopping).

As far as the math goes, normally I do try to involve everyone, at least it was something I was planning on for that performance, but one of my volunteers pulled out a calculator. (It was suggested to me to get a jumbo novelty calculator and add everything up myself).

The idea of propping the money envelope up is a good one, never occurred to me, I'll definitely have to try that next time, and tighten up the patter.

Re the cat meat joke...you're right, it is too easy to say (and I do have cats myself). I would argue that the "20 minutes later, you're hungry again" is cliche in the same vein. It's a work in progress, and it definitely has progressed since the first few times I did it. The only way to find out what doesn't work is to go out there and make the mistakes, right?

Thanks again

I do mostly strolling and kids shows - but I recently was working on more of a stage show for a slightly older group for a camp show. It was tough for me. Many of the jokes and lines I had written, got smaller responses than I'd hoped for. So I can relate to the difficulty of playing to the small stage crowd as opposed to what I was comfortable with (strolling/kids shows).

I think a great thing to do for you is to look back at the video, and remember any other performances, and note the lines that DID get good reactions (your Zagats Approved line seemed to get a good laugh) and also note the ones that did not (100% Cat Meat). Over many performances, you'll narrow down your lines to only the funniest and most effective, and your routine will be slick.

I thought of anothe line you could use for when the cheesecake is selected: "ah yes, what better place to get a slice of 'NY Style Cheesecake', than from a Chinese restaurant in south Detroit (or wherever the menu is from)! Good choice sir." Said with a touch of sarcasm and a smile, I think it would get a nice laugh.

Hmm, maybe I need to work on enunciation better, I said "Atkin's approved" but the Zagat's line...that's good. Yes...I'm glad I thought of it...

The cheesecake idea is good. The menu portion isn't as well developed as the fortune cookie bit. I worked on the time machine/card to fortune cookie bit in my restaurant work, so it got a lot of practice and I was able to hone it down to what worked and what didn't. I think that shows. The menus...that was just used as a segue to the cookie bit (and justify the prop). Unfortunately, I think that shows a bit too. Due to constructive feedback I saw the light and wrote the jokes for the restaurants and food (I have no idea why it didn't occur to me before, I adlib stuff like that all the time).

Thanks again for the advice, if anyone else has any, please share (I notice my video watch count going up, so I know it's being viewed )

Josh

I have a suit that fits now too!

Ok, well I have viewed it, and having read your above post I feel guilted into making a reply. But unfortunately I have nothing to say. Well, I do, but I don't have anything useful to say. The first trick was very clever. If I were performing it, I'd emphasise the fairness of the selections at the start and the selection of the orders. Perhaps have spectator #1 add up with a calculator and have it checked by another spec in the audience later? Just a thought.

I don't want to make it look like I'm guilting people into saying anything. It's just that any feedback I've been given wasn't very consistent, so I'm just looking for a greater outside perspective than just a judging panel. Lay audiences love it, which is really all that counts, but I do want to make it better, naturally.

Sorry, I should have been a bit more clear - I was just messing about. Dry sarcasm I'm afraid. Anyway, it's stupidly late here so its time to attempt some sleeping I think. All the best

Chris

Cheap plug: If you do any card magic I'd appreciate a comment on the thread below this

Oh, I'm sorry. I listened to it only once on somewhat low volume while at work, I'm sure your announciation (sp?) was fine!

I hope so, my high school drama teacher would kill me if I slipped! (After 20+ plays, I hope I'm enunciating). Don't apologize, I'll be using the Zagat's line now, it's much better than "Across from the IHOP!" which was a placeholder anyway.

(Is it just me, or do I look psychotic in my avatar?)

Josh