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simchamagic
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Hi,

I don't know if there was a post of this previously, this is all I was able to find:
http://www.themagiccafe.com/forums/viewt......forum=24

So - What great funny lines do you have for a bill to lemon routine?

If each Magi here will only give one or two, I'm sure the amount that'll be gathered will benefit all of us.

I'll start:

The line I found funniest: After the bill disappeares/changes: "Did you give me a 100$ bill?" ; "Yes" ; "Thanks!"

Also found this to be pretty good: When handing back the bill: "Not only that you're getting back your bill, but you're also getting with it vitamins A and C!"

Come on guys, what do you have?
Ian Keable
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I've been doing the Bill in Lemon for more years than I can remember; and have built up a collection of lines which work for me during the course of my routine. However I don't actually use any 'funny lines' as such when cutting open the lemon and showing the bill inside.

According to Dai Vernon, Email Jarrow used to say, as he cut open the lemon, something to the effect: 'Why's a lemon like a synagogue? Because there's juice (jews) coming out'. Apparently Jarrow dropped the gag because it lessened the impact of the magic (my own theory is that he dropped the gag because it wasn't very funny!). But the principle is important. At the moment of great magic you don't want too much laughter.

Having said that, Billy McComb gave me a line, which I sometimes use in front of some audiences. When displaying the bill inside the lemon to the person who lent the money and asking him to remove it, I say: "Don't worry, it's not a joint!"
Ian Keable
Author of Stand-Up, A Professional Guide to Comedy Magic
Available for sale at http://www.iankeable.co.uk
Ken Dumm
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After I make the bill vanish, I'll ask someone in the audience "Mary, did you see that okay?", no matter what she says I'll respond, "No?", then to the person who loaned the bill, "Bob, I need another $20 (whatever denomination he loaned), Mary wants to see that trick again..."

Usually gets a good laugh...

Ken
magic4u02
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Good stuff. Another funny line is to wait till someone laughs in the audience. look at them.. pause and then say, "Yeah your laughing now. Just remember, this could have been YOUR 20 dollars."

I also like to deliver this line after their bill gets destroyed, vanished or burnt.

"well Mike I have some good news and some bad news for ya bud. The bad news is your 20 bucks is toast.. literally. The good news? Oh I just saved a lot of money by switching to GEICO!?"

Kyle
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Ian Keable
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For those who leave a corner of the bill with the spectator - and having seen the remainder of his bill disappear - a good line again was given to me by Billy McComb. "If you don't see the bill again, take the corner down to your bank manager and he will tell you what to do with it!" Apparently Ricki Dunn just used to say - "That's the only piece you're gonna get tonight!"
Ian Keable
Author of Stand-Up, A Professional Guide to Comedy Magic
Available for sale at http://www.iankeable.co.uk
spatrick
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Not only is the bill inside it is also now cleaned with the fresh scent of lemon.

S. Patrick
Eric Lott
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I saw Warren Gibson (http://warrenandannabelles.com/) perform it at his show in Maui. He borrowed a $100 bill. As he referred to the bill throughout the trick after it had been vanished, he kept lowering the denomination. "Don't worry, George, you'll get your $50 back." "Nancy, now you're going to help me find George's $20." Eventually he did a coin trick and offered George some change.

It was a running joke throughout the routine that got a lot of laughs.
simchamagic
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Great until now!

Here's another one: At some stage between borrowing the bill and changing\vanishing it you say a line involving the words 'Thanks to the person who donated this 100$ bill' (*donated*).

New contributors, what have you got?
cheaptrick
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I offer the lemon as a "consolation prize" (so the spec won't go home empty handed. At least he has SOMETHING for his twenty.)

BUT, there is a problem. I got a letter from the DEPARTMENT OF AGRICULTURE the other day. They said they were having problems with foreign objects imbedded in this years lemon crop and I can't let the lemon leave the building without thououghly examining it.

Of course this destroys the lemon but the law is the law .........

:magicrabbit:
"Pick any card. NOT that one!!!"
Martijn van Berkel
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When signing the bill: " I always ask people to sign the bill, so I know when I'm at home who gave it to me"
Dynamike
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Ending lines:

"I never knew money could be so sour."

"You lucky I did not use a onion, or you would really be in tears."
Big Daddy Cool
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BDC says as the bill is being signed "I'd do that myself, 'cept I don't wanna go ta prison..."
Swing hard, swing often, and we'll catch ya on the Flip-Side!
John Pyka
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simchamagic
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BDC - That's great!
Cabrera
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One of my pet lines....." If life deals you a lemon...pull out a $100.00 bill!" or twenty etc.
"The quilt of life is woven with many different threads"
Bairefoot
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I do a lot of shows and 90% are for adults. So here's one for you can use. As you are getting ready to burn the bill I start rolling it and look at my helping any say, "When's the last time you rolled somthing up and lit it up?" Again, you can only use this for that right ocassions. And everyone can not pull it off. But, I think its funny.
The Awesome One
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I've always liked Amazing Jonothan's performance of this. Some of the lines are great. Need to be the right kind of performer to pull it off.
Win if you can, lose if you must, but always cheat.
DavidLynn
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If the note has a human face on it. "my word, I knew there is magic in lemon juice but I didn't think it would put such a sour face on ...<name of person on note>..."
nathanallen
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Quote:
On 2008-09-28 08:56, Ian Keable wrote:
When displaying the bill inside the lemon to the person who lent the money and asking him to remove it, I say: "Don't worry, it's not a joint!"


...I wonder if, instead of verbalizing "joint", you just see the rolled up bill, get immediately happy and excited as you grab the rolled up bill from the fruit yourself (fairly and openly of course, to avoid suspicion), and brought it up to your lips and tried to inhale. Then look at it, smile disappears, and all disappointed-like, say, "Oh. Nevermind." And then hand it to the volunteer.

This way the audience is making the connection in their own mind, instead of having you spell it out for them. I think they'll laugh harder. Give it a shot once, just to see how it plays.
Nathan Allen, The Maniac of Magic
www.maniacofmagic.com

To buy a prop is nothing.
To write a good routine is something.
To really entertain an audience is everything.
georgecoolla
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BaireFoot, thanks for sharing. I like your line!
magicnorm
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After recieving the $100 bill, every a time I refer to it in the routine I use a deminished number,
The 50 you loaned my, the Twenty and finally when the bill is cut out of the lemon it is down to a $5 bill. Always gets great laughs if delivered as if you are actually making a mistake. Remember acting is the key.
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