You sew your ripped clothes with invisible thread...

You develop a wand callous...

You have no connection with 9to5ers at all.... none... no reason to hold a conversation with them. If you're invited to eat, after the show you decline because... What would you talk about? Nothing. You would end-up regaling them with stories of past performances... which is like work. So you get paid and exit, stage right, only to go through the drive-thru on the way home and order a burger because you didn't want to eat the catered food... because you didn't want to talk with anyone.

So you tell this to your therapist and they say you are not well rounded and you say "oh yeah" you need to join a magic club and see for yourself that it's true. There's sheep and there are shepherds and your therapist is an idiot because they don't have any real world experience.

Note: The above is merely conjecture on my part, I am in no way inferring that anyone is better then anyone else except Dave Matkin, he's the best and maybe Kyle and... ok you talked me into it.... Dynamike.

Why? because they put up with the rest of us and it's pretty safe to post their names now that the search function has been taken away, So, say what you want.... there's no search function and with the economy there's no function to search,

You give your wife a Floating Rose for Valentines Day

You spend HOURS reading though all the new threads on here hoping someone will use your name!

And yep most people are better than me.

I hear he also does good shampoo and conditioner its how he keeps his hair nice!

You calculate the area of Deans Triangle to be ba/2

You never leave home without a smoke and mirror.

You have 4,000 jokers saved.

Your inground pool is shaped like a top hat...

Every time you find a small piece of bent wire, you wonder which prop is missing a part.

You find something in a bag that is supposed to be empty and you aren't surprised.

You tell your wife those hollow eggs in the refrigerator are lo cal...

When you get more mail from Nani than you get from your mother.

You want to replace the old prop with a new one just like it. (Of course, the manufacturer died forty years ago!)

All your xmas card envelopes have Houdini stamps on them...

You are laying down in bed this moment with a beer can in your hand reading this post.

Your wife just gives up and finally starts answering to the name "Nani".

You drop a coin a million times a year.

When the only luggage you own is a sub trunk.