In a couple of weeks, you will hang ornaments
and candy canes on your botania...

I must be dyslexic. I thought he wrote banana.

You actually periodically go back and read all 141 pages of this post.

You dissect why 141 pages only generate 3 likes.

..and 3 contributers...

Who have nothing better to do even on Hollidays.

You plan your next 50 posts...

You watch all these cooking shows on TV and you constantly yell loudly that they could speed things up, if they if used a Dove Pan.

You approach Oprah about starting a Magic Channel

Waiting.........

You size up every woman you meet by whether or not she will fit into your zig-zag illusion.

You t&r everyone's dinner napkin, after they were used...

You start recognizing magic principals when you're on a ride at Disneyland.

You are not trying to get Dynamike banned from the Café.

You could be selling shows but you're too busy writing this.

You could be selling shows but you're too busy reading Jay Leslie's funny one liners.

When you need to read 6000 one liners just to catch up

When Jay Leslie's one liners become the main patter in your show.

That will be 10 dollars please.

Jay, the Loch Ness monster sold them to me for three fiddy.
You've changed your stage name so many times that you have to look at your drivers license to remember who you really are.