By the time you can do an advanced card flourish you realize not only are your kids out of diapers but they have also graduated college.

You have your wife stand in the mismade but forget to tell her the secret.

Your mother describes you as, " My son the magician", instead of "My son the doctor".

All your directions are alphabetised by manufacturer and in one place

When you forget your car keys but not your cards

Your friends hack your computer to figure out your recent searches on online magic stores in a desperate attempt to find you a gift.

You think the mark of a good tailor is the quality of his dove harnesses.

You have a custom made cup that fits in your mouth, for the bullet catch.

You go to the dentist office to borrow tools.

You walk into the Dentist's office, they take one look at you and say "What is it this week?".

In the emergency room they have to ask you to take off your holdout and thumb tip so they can examine you.

You twist you hand around in the doctors office and ask if it's normal...

You also put a ball in your armpit to stop your pulse.

You have to explain callouses caused by shuffling cards.

You have worn out 3 magic wands.

You don't find your chop cup attractive any more...

You live by RULE NUMBER ONE on page 72 of "You Know You're A Magician When"

You carry extra thumb tacks so you can post your business card on the bulletin board.

You can recite the ISBN numbers of your favorite 100 magic books.

You are still waiting for Doug Henning's opinion on your effect.

The only things in your house not covered with dust are magic props.