When you get a horn for your car that honks the Magic Land of Allakazam theme.

You fill up your gas tank, load your equipment and program your GPS for a show in two weeks.

You have a garage full of ropes, chains, and locks, but they are only used for escapes.

99 percent of your phone book consists of, you guessed it, matriculators.

You need a 10 terabyte drive to back up
all your magic videos...

You're starting to post every other comment.

You rather perform instead of watching the Super Bowl.

You wear-out your wrist practicing a move, 18 thousand times, and now you can't actually perform it.

Anything card sized that you pick up you subconsciously begin to back and front palm it.

You see a fire truck and imagine all the tricks you can do with it

Cut and restored hose
Chain escape from a ladder

Your next...

You try doing sponge tricks with a bowling ball.

You look at the sticker price of a car and think, " With that much I could buy a zig-zag, a super X, and an assistant's revenge."

Every mirror in your house is adjusted to see your hands.

AT Sunday school, you sing psalms from
the Amatuer Magician's Handbook...

When you can't resist the temptation to make your wife's valentine flowers disappear.

You’ve read 144 pages of this stuff……. which is Gross

Except in the case of balloon animals which used to come 144 to a bag but now come 100 to a bag and they didn’t think we’d notice.

..and all of jay's tricks...

When someone asks about a particular trick and you can quote Volume, year, and page number of the magic magazine it first appeared in.

When you invented a trick (which took a year to work out) and someone (who bought it the week before) insists on showing you the correct way to do it.

You always change your avatar on the Café like Jay does.