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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Not very magical, still... » » What's The Deal With The Dating Sites? (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

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R.S.
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For those of you (guys) that are on dating sites, how many have gotten "fake" replies from women? And I’m not talking about the cheesy, fly-by-night websites, I’m talking about the major ones – Match.com and Yahoo Personals. I have been an on-and off subscriber (mostly on) to those sites for several years. And it has been my experience that a very high percentage - perhaps 60%, of the female profiles on both of these sites are… well, not real. Below I have pasted some actual examples of the numerous "fake" responses I have gotten after saying “hello” or simply “winking” at a girl (I have purposely altered their email address):


Emails that I have received:
Example 1:
How are you and how is your family and friends.I just noticed you are among my matches. I am new to this kind of things, am only giving try and see what is going to come out. I will like to know you more better, Maybe something great and lovely can come out of the friendship, This is my private email, mail to:address so we can talk much better as I will be removing my profile off soon, so we can share more picture's also.($@$#!@yahoo.com), /A/B/C/D/4/u/2/s/i/@//y/a/h/o/o/./c/o/m/ I want you to know that all am seeking is a true relationship that will lead to something great. I will truly be honored to read back from you as soon as possible.you can add me to your Yahoo messenger....ABCD4u2si..


Example 2:
And may I ask your name ?
I really reget that I must be going,
talk later ?
I would you to write to me here : <abcdefg> at gmail.com
I have a very nice pics specially for you
Goodbye and thank you !


Example 3:
How are you doing?Thanks for the winks and I like your profile and Its very Lovely and Awesome. I wil like to know more about your Last relationship , My name is Tiffany and Have No Kids, I am new on this Online dating Scene and I Just wanted to know where this will lead to.. Wel I am a Honest,Kind,Caring,Loyal,truthfull and God fearing Person, I am not here for any stupid games But I am Looking for a serious and Long term relationship. I don't Care about the Age or Distance cos I believe that when it is time for the Meeting I don't care about relocating, and I will Like to know More about your last relationship may be you are the Angel Sent down from God... I will be Glad to hear back from you and Know more about your Las relationship. But I don't like double dating and I don't like staying on the Website that Much...
I will be Glad if you can Write me Directly to ABCDEFG AT YAHOO DOT COM and tell me more about your last relationship


I no longer even respond to these because they are so easy to recognize as “fake.” But in EVERY single one of these sorts of replys that I did respond to in the past, I was either asked to use a different (suspicious) email address, which I did not, or I got no response whatsoever. If I insisted on using the dating site to communicate, or asked them for some other innocuous information about themselves, they would reply with the EXACT same email they first sent me, as if their emails were just automatic responses with no human behind them! Or, many times their profile would simply be removed from the dating site – sometimes within MINUTES of them sending me an email! As if they quickly removed their profile so that the only way I could reach them was through the email address as given in their response to me.

In the past month alone, I have contacted 23 women. Nine did not respond at all (either through disinterest, or they are no longer an active member I presume), one seemed to be legitimate (although even that line of communication has gone silent), and, get this... THIRTEEN were of the “phony” variety that I listed above!! This is quite representative of the sum total of my several years on both of these sites (although not so much in the beginning - it seems to have gotten worse lately).

WTF? Who is behind these and what do they hope to accomplish? I have come to believe that these sites, despite whatever statistics they give you, are comprised predominantly of men (after all, we are the “hunters” by nature) lured by the promise of a “score.” Someone out there is looking to take advantage of that. Also, I would bet my last nickel that the relatively few legitimate females on these sites are NOT getting these sort of fake responses from guys! No guy that I know would simply “string along” a female admirer in the manner that I have described, with no intent of ever meeting her. In fact, some females I have discussed this with who are also members on these sites report that they have more legitimate advances than they know what to do with!! It’s definitely a one-way street with the guys at a disadvantage.

Anyway, this has been my studied observation. Any thoughts?

Ron
"It is error only, and not truth, that shrinks from inquiry." Thomas Paine
Steven Steele
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I've been happily married for 31 years; so I have no experience with these sites. However, I have a couple of friends (and friends of my son) who have used them with similar results. The general consensus, listening to them talk, is that the sites are all scams. Having said that, I have one friend who was widowed and met somebody on eHarmony after trying other sites with no results (or similar to yours, I'm not sure). After a year or so, they got married. So it can happen, but I think, most are just scams. Good luck.
Ken Northridge
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This may sound cold, but it think its a numbers game. Just delete the weirdoes and move on.

I met my wife on line and we have been happily married for 8 1/2 years.
"Love is the real magic." -Doug Henning
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R.S.
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A friend of mine met and married a girl from Match.com, so I know that it can happen too. It's just that for every one of those, there are literally thousands of dead-ends, inactive, or phony profiles (and as I said, I will bet that 99.9% of the phony profiles are female profiles).

Don't get me wrong - I am by no means desperate to meet a girl and get married. I am not terribly bothered by the fakes (it's more of an annoyance - although really annoying lately). But I have gotten very curious as to who's behind them, and what is motivating them?? Are guys really dumb enough to fall for that stuff? Enough so to make it worthwile for the "Scammers" to keep subscribing themselves?

Ron
"It is error only, and not truth, that shrinks from inquiry." Thomas Paine
critter
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Never been to a dating site, but I get these kinds of messages on MySpace.
"The fool is one who doesn't know what you have just found out."
~Will Rogers
Chance
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Google 417 scams. These sites is how many of the scammers find their marks.
balducci
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R.S., I'm sure the replies you posted are canned responses. From Russian bride outfits, or some pay for view web cam site, or something similar. If you took the bait, I'm sure they would try to reel you in. So either delete them and move on, or reply and have fun trying to waste a scammer's time.

I also know of a couple of couples who met and even married, having met on on-line dating sites. So they can work.
Make America Great Again! - Trump in 2020 ... "We're a capitalistic society. I go into business, I don't make it, I go bankrupt. They're not going to bail me out. I've been on welfare and food stamps. Did anyone help me? No." - Craig T. Nelson, actor.
George Ledo
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A friend of mine met her soul mate on Match.com. Married a year later and still going at it. Darn thing is, he's a really nice guy with a solid job. And a sense of humor to boot.
That's our departed buddy Burt, aka The Great Burtini, doing his famous Cups and Mice routine
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MagicSanta
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For you "I met my/my friend met their.....on line" let me say I know two people who murdered there 'soul mates', so there. And a special note to George, in the bay area a woman couldn't find a guy? In the valley there are three guys for every woman and they have careers, degrees, houses, and are nice guys, no wonder they can't find anyone, the chicks are on line.

RS, that is interesting info because I've never been on one of those sites (married 20 years) nor do I space job or face thingy. I had no idea that scammers would use those systems. If they have an email address turn 'em in, I work for a major provider and they ban folks all the time from the service for scammin'.

I did talk to a customer the other day who got me, a technical advisor type, to find out how he can track down women and keep his wife from accessing the sites herself. I got him into parental controls.
George Ledo
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Quote:
On 2009-09-15 03:38, MagicSanta wrote:
And a special note to George, in the bay area a woman couldn't find a guy? In the valley there are three guys for every woman and they have careers, degrees, houses, and are nice guys, no wonder they can't find anyone, the chicks are on line.

Not making any value judgments here... just commenting on what happened. Smile
That's our departed buddy Burt, aka The Great Burtini, doing his famous Cups and Mice routine
www.georgefledo.net

Latest column: "Sorry about the photos in my posts here"
Bill Nuvo
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I used to be on Plenty of Fish and initially met the wonderful women I'm with now on that site.

I view dating on these sites, just like doing business. Work the percentages. Some ladies, you just talk to, some you meet once, others you avoid totally, and then there are the diamonds in the rough.
MickeyPainless
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I think the key is to subscribe to the big name time tested sites with tough interview criteria and higher fees. Joining "FindASkank.Com" might be something to pass on!
LobowolfXXX
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Quote:
On 2009-09-15 18:38, MickeyPainless wrote:
Joining "FindASkank.Com" might be something to pass on!



Hey! Hey! *I* don't judge *you*! C'mon now, Mick!
"Torture doesn't work" lol
Guess they forgot to tell Bill Buckley.

"...as we reason and love, we are able to hope. And hope enables us to resist those things that would enslave us."
tommy
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I was just about to go to sleep when I heard a tap tap tap on my bedroom window, and I thought who could that be, and who do you think it was? Well I looked out and there was Greta Garbo, stark naked but for a short nightdress. I was amazed as I had only met on line an hour before.
If there is a single truth about Magic, it is that nothing on earth so efficiently evades it.

Tommy
MagicSanta
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My sister in law really believes all the guys my niece meets on line are male models who are attending graduate school at Yale after getting degrees at Harvard.
Josh Riel
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There are certain rules I abide by whilst I am on the Internet for serious pursuits such as the gathering of knowledge and distributing my own wealth of brilliance and innovation:

1: There are no girls on the Internet. There may be pron bots, there may be Traps, but Women? no.

There are other rules, but no one cares about them.

I got into a disagreement with my wife while she was on the Internet about the fact that she was not there as she is a girl.
But I know/knew too many dudes pretending to be girls (IE Traps) who 'cyber' with other dudes.

If you want to believe that the guy in Japan is a sweet little Texan lass, be my guest...
Magic is doing improbable things with odd items that, under normal circumstances, would be unnessecary and quite often undesirable.
Brian Proctor
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My dad was single, and he kept his dating a secret, he is 65. Our family had planned on meeting at one of my niece's soccer games. Well... My dad shows up with some woman I had never seen before. He introduced her and said that they met on E Harmony a few weeks ago and that they are getting married... in a month. To me, it was like straight out of a movie. But they are happily married still and they never argue. So I am happy if he is happy, but at the time I was just blown away.
tommy
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Did she look Japanese?
If there is a single truth about Magic, it is that nothing on earth so efficiently evades it.

Tommy
MickeyPainless
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Quote:
On 2009-09-15 19:01, LobowolfXXX wrote:
Hey! Hey! *I* don't judge *you*! C'mon now, Mick!


Never brother, never!

Slightly off topic but funny as hell (IMO)..... My best friend (dead now) had a terrible marital history (3 failed and engaged to prospect 4 when he died at 45) and his choice in casual dates wasn't much better. He once told me that he had done the math and figured if he flew to Vegas twice a month, paid for a $1000.00 a night hooker he figured it would have been far less expensive and that he would have enjoyed more sex!

He would have loved internet dating! Smile
daffydoug
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I have been fortunate. In May I met the woman I love and who loves me through a dating site. We are a perfect match. We have about ten thousand things in common. We get along great and she is BEAUTIFUL to boot. She's going to college to be a teacher. Over the past few months we have become very close.

Anyway, during that time I also ran into the scams. Some girl named Esther Osei from Kenya Africa. Sent me a "photo" and looked like a model. Right. And I also have some ocean front property in Arizona to sell you.

Anyway, I still get bait in my spam box. For your amusement, here is the most recent one I received from a certain Anabel Gabar. Hope you get a laugh out of it. I sure did.:

HELLO
How are you today, I hope all is well with you ..I am sorry to worry you with my Proposal for a relationship with you, but I know that you will grant my request in good faith and understanding, My name is Annabel, I just went Through your profile I have no options than letting you Know that I am interested in having a relationship with you, I will also like to Know you the more, you can send an email to my email address (Annabel4urlove@yahoo.com) so that I can send you more details about my self Including my picture. I believe we can move from here. But bear in mind that Love has no colors barrier, no educational back ground barrier, no socio-economic Barrier, religious, language, nationality or distance barrier, the only important Thing there is love. I am waiting for your mail to my email address above. Yours Sincerely Annabel.

The last paragraph is a gem! " I believe we can move from here?" Sounds like a business deal not a relationship!

But bear in mind that Love has no colors barrier, no educational back ground barrier, no socio-economic Barrier, religious, language, nationality or distance barrier, the only important Thing there is love. (Barf!!!!!!!!!)
The difficult must become easy, the easy beautiful and the beautiful magical.
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