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JimbosMagic Inner circle 1334 Posts |
The Dachshund's a dog of German descent.
who's tail never new where his front end went
JIMMY CARLO. KIDabra International Family Entertainer of the Year 2009.
IBM Triple Award Winner. Uk Champion of Comedy Magic. Represented the UK in the United Slapstick Awards on German TV. European Children's Entertainer of the year 2007/8 |
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Bill Ligon Inner circle A sure sign of a misspent youth: 6437 Posts |
My favorite fish is he bass.
He climbs up on the seaside trees And slides down on his hands and knees.
Author of THE HOLY ART: Bizarre Magick From Naljorpa's Cave. NOW IN HARDCOVER! VIEW: <BR>www.lulu.com/content/1399405 ORDER: http://stores.lulu.com/naljorpa
<BR>A TASSEL ON THE LUNATIC FRINGE |
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JamesTong Eternal Order Malaysia 11213 Posts |
Quote:
On 2009-10-21 14:19, JimbosMagic wrote: :lol: |
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Irfaan Kahan Veteran user 346 Posts |
Spinach - yeeauuch!!
I can't believe this is still going . . . . What's the difference between a magician and a mentalist? One does magic, the other mentalism. *Groan*
I'm a Magician playing the part of an Actor
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JimbosMagic Inner circle 1334 Posts |
Are we poisonous? asked the baby snake to his mother.
Yes dear, she replied, why do you ask? Cos I have just bitten my tongue.
JIMMY CARLO. KIDabra International Family Entertainer of the Year 2009.
IBM Triple Award Winner. Uk Champion of Comedy Magic. Represented the UK in the United Slapstick Awards on German TV. European Children's Entertainer of the year 2007/8 |
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Bill Ligon Inner circle A sure sign of a misspent youth: 6437 Posts |
The woodpecker pecked at the outhouse door;
He pecked and pecked 'til his p****r got sore.
Author of THE HOLY ART: Bizarre Magick From Naljorpa's Cave. NOW IN HARDCOVER! VIEW: <BR>www.lulu.com/content/1399405 ORDER: http://stores.lulu.com/naljorpa
<BR>A TASSEL ON THE LUNATIC FRINGE |
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JamesTong Eternal Order Malaysia 11213 Posts |
The wild lion doesn't like to eat ice cream.
That's because it is carniverous. |
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MrGreggy Loyal user 213 Posts |
What's the difference between an epileptic oyster shucker and a prostitute with diarrhea?
The epileptic oyster shucker always shucks between fits, and the prostitute with diarrhea always... |
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JamesTong Eternal Order Malaysia 11213 Posts |
What happens when you cross all your fingers together?
You go into a burst of laughter. |
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JimbosMagic Inner circle 1334 Posts |
How do you stop a skunk smelling/???/ put a clothes peg on its nose.
Now that's not funny.
JIMMY CARLO. KIDabra International Family Entertainer of the Year 2009.
IBM Triple Award Winner. Uk Champion of Comedy Magic. Represented the UK in the United Slapstick Awards on German TV. European Children's Entertainer of the year 2007/8 |
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Irfaan Kahan Veteran user 346 Posts |
A mushroom walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says that he does not serve mushrooms in his bar.
The mushroom responds: "Why not? I'm a fun guy." *Groan*
I'm a Magician playing the part of an Actor
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JamesTong Eternal Order Malaysia 11213 Posts |
Irfaan Kahan, we are moving on to the 2nd page now
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Irfaan Kahan Veteran user 346 Posts |
Guys, this has to stop, seriously. I can't believe it's gone on this long! What's the matter with us??
Broccoli - aaeeuuurrgh!!!
I'm a Magician playing the part of an Actor
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JamesTong Eternal Order Malaysia 11213 Posts |
Question: What goes up and stay there for a while?
Answer: Gags fever. |
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Bill Ligon Inner circle A sure sign of a misspent youth: 6437 Posts |
A man was walking home one night when he heard, "Bump!
Bump! Bump!" He looked back and saw an upright casket banging down the street. Terrified, the man ran toward his home, the casket pursuing him. He opened his door and locked it behind him. The casket crashed through the door, with its lid clapping. The man rushed to the bathroom and locked the door. He heard the casket coming. Bump! Bump! Bump! It crashed through the door! Desperate, the man hurled a bottle of Robitussin against the casket. It worked! The coffin stopped!
Author of THE HOLY ART: Bizarre Magick From Naljorpa's Cave. NOW IN HARDCOVER! VIEW: <BR>www.lulu.com/content/1399405 ORDER: http://stores.lulu.com/naljorpa
<BR>A TASSEL ON THE LUNATIC FRINGE |
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JamesTong Eternal Order Malaysia 11213 Posts |
Bill, that is one long unfunny gag.
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Bill Ligon Inner circle A sure sign of a misspent youth: 6437 Posts |
A court jester was fond of making puns about every subject he came across, except of course, the king. When asked why, he replied that obviously the king is the king and therefore not a subject.
This angered the king greatly, and he ordered the jester to be put to death. Just as the executioner was putting the noose around the jester's neck, the king suddenly cried out, "Wait! This man has entertained me since I was a child. I can't stand to see him die this way!" The jester then said, "No noose is good news," and died happily.
Author of THE HOLY ART: Bizarre Magick From Naljorpa's Cave. NOW IN HARDCOVER! VIEW: <BR>www.lulu.com/content/1399405 ORDER: http://stores.lulu.com/naljorpa
<BR>A TASSEL ON THE LUNATIC FRINGE |
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Bill Ligon Inner circle A sure sign of a misspent youth: 6437 Posts |
At the racetrack there was a mudder that ate its fodder.
Author of THE HOLY ART: Bizarre Magick From Naljorpa's Cave. NOW IN HARDCOVER! VIEW: <BR>www.lulu.com/content/1399405 ORDER: http://stores.lulu.com/naljorpa
<BR>A TASSEL ON THE LUNATIC FRINGE |
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JamesTong Eternal Order Malaysia 11213 Posts |
Student: Why are you making all kind of balls? There are so many in your house.
Teacher: I like to perform close-up magic gags. |
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joseph Eternal Order Please ignore my 17407 Posts |
Q. Where were moby dick and orca born?
A. Wales...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
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