On Halloween, you have 2 shows and 3 hayrides...

... the chaw in your jaw is strictly for misdirection.

After the show you're asked to draw the wining ticket to the door prize- a pound of Government Cheese

... whenever an audience member hands you back a deck of cards that have been shuffled and cut, you riffle them with your thumb and ask, "Ok, who cut the cheese!"

The Tree Of Hearts is your encore effect.

You are a magician outstanding in his field...

You can do fried green tomatoes in a dove pan.

Your sound system speakers used to belong
to the Moonlight Drive-in Theater...

Your table is two step ladders and a board.

When another magician says 'You stepped in it" they really mean dog doo and not a trap door.

... what you call your Ladder Suspension is made of pipe and carries two ladders on top of your pickup.

You bet

" A Six Pack, Or Better"

that you can find their card.

You produce a Ferrari on jack stands...

Your table base is made from an old tire rim. (The chrome ones are really fancy!)

You can perform Smoke without the gimmick...

You're wife does Plate Spinning, which are really hubcaps.

You make the The Organ Pipes out of Diesel Truck Exhausts.

You always take your hound dog so you're fleas have a home away from home.

Your floating carved pumpkin has more teeth than you...

You find your Mindreading Goose more sexually appealing than your wife.

... the Darling Family is your opening act.

As a gift for volunteering, you give your volunteers a container of gold tooth polish.