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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Now that’s funny! » » You know you're a redneck magician when... (23 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

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joseph
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Eternal Order
Please ignore my
17288 Posts

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You do a show every year for the 30 residents of Mayberry...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
jazzy snazzy
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Inner circle
run off by a mob of Villagers wielding
2109 Posts

Profile of jazzy snazzy
You can catch bird shot in your teeth.
For mentalism, you can predict your zip code.
You perform your parlor act every week at the pool parlor...
and the funeral parlor.
"The secret of life is to look good from a distance."
-Charles Schulz
joseph
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17288 Posts

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Your vent puppet speaks better than you...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
tabman
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Inner circle
USA
5946 Posts

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... you're working out a routine using fishing tackle and a bamboo chop cup.
...Your professional woodworking and "tender" loving care in the products you make, make the wait worthwhile. Thanks for all you do...

http://Sefalaljia.com
Bob Sanders
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Grammar Supervisor
Magic Valley Ranch, Clanton, Alabama
20534 Posts

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Instead of sponge bunnies, you use some you whittled out of cedar.
Bob Sanders

Magic By Sander / The Amazed Wiz

AmazedWiz@Yahoo.com
joseph
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Eternal Order
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17288 Posts

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You buy a magic book, and remember you can't read...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
jay leslie
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V.I.P.
Southern California
9497 Posts

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Every trick in the show is red, white or blue
Bob Sanders
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Grammar Supervisor
Magic Valley Ranch, Clanton, Alabama
20534 Posts

Profile of Bob Sanders
Everyone in the audience dips snuff.
Bob Sanders

Magic By Sander / The Amazed Wiz

AmazedWiz@Yahoo.com
tabman
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Inner circle
USA
5946 Posts

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... you're booked to escape from a giant meat smoker at the Tylerville BBQ Cookoff Saturday night.
...Your professional woodworking and "tender" loving care in the products you make, make the wait worthwhile. Thanks for all you do...

http://Sefalaljia.com
Bob Sanders
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Grammar Supervisor
Magic Valley Ranch, Clanton, Alabama
20534 Posts

Profile of Bob Sanders
... you work the Opp, Alabama Rattle Snake Rodeo and Roundup.
Bob Sanders

Magic By Sander / The Amazed Wiz

AmazedWiz@Yahoo.com
jay leslie
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V.I.P.
Southern California
9497 Posts

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You take the tickets, sweep the grounds, run the lights and put on the show too.
tabman
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... when a promoter asks you if you want to four-wall a show, you immediately think tent.
...Your professional woodworking and "tender" loving care in the products you make, make the wait worthwhile. Thanks for all you do...

http://Sefalaljia.com
jay leslie
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V.I.P.
Southern California
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Promoter... What promoter? That's your exwife on the phone drinkin coffee and smokin cigaretts, and occasionally she hacks-up a show.
tabman
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Inner circle
USA
5946 Posts

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Quote:
On 2010-06-03 19:34, jay leslie wrote:
Promoter... What promoter? That's your exwife on the phone drinkin coffee and smokin cigaretts, and occasionally she hacks-up a show.


... I like it. Its becoming the movie I always wanted to make.
...Your professional woodworking and "tender" loving care in the products you make, make the wait worthwhile. Thanks for all you do...

http://Sefalaljia.com
jay leslie
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V.I.P.
Southern California
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So you go to the show and it's supposed to be at the Hungary Club, and you tell every Polish joke you know... even though there are red headed, light complected, people in the audience..... then after the show they asked why so many Polish jokes, and you explain that it is the Hungary Club, Right?

Then the president corrects you and says they all get together, once a month to eat.... it's the HUNGRY club.

(Story of my life)

Posted: Jun 3, 2010 10:29pm
Seriouswy

If you use a Piston Ring Compressor to load a rabbit in your hat does THAT make you a red neck magician?
tabman
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Inner circle
USA
5946 Posts

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... a younger Gailard Sarain would be perfect. You're probably not familiar with the Ernest movies but they made the first two or three in Nashville. Gailard and the guy who played Bobby in Ernest Goes to Jail and let Gailard play the magician the same way he played the camp cook in Ernest Goes to Camp.

Oh well, can't go back in time.
...Your professional woodworking and "tender" loving care in the products you make, make the wait worthwhile. Thanks for all you do...

http://Sefalaljia.com
joseph
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Eternal Order
Please ignore my
17288 Posts

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You are a master performer of the multiplying corn cob pipes...
"Everything should be made as simple as possible, but no simpler." (Einstein)...
Bob Sanders
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Grammar Supervisor
Magic Valley Ranch, Clanton, Alabama
20534 Posts

Profile of Bob Sanders
... you think Bass Pro Shop is the best venue anywhere. Do "magic in the round" standing in your boat on the trailer in the parking lot.
Bob Sanders

Magic By Sander / The Amazed Wiz

AmazedWiz@Yahoo.com
jay leslie
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V.I.P.
Southern California
9497 Posts

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You use sand paper to clean your face before the show.
Bob Sanders
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Grammar Supervisor
Magic Valley Ranch, Clanton, Alabama
20534 Posts

Profile of Bob Sanders
You drink champaign from the bottle.
Bob Sanders

Magic By Sander / The Amazed Wiz

AmazedWiz@Yahoo.com
The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Now that’s funny! » » You know you're a redneck magician when... (23 Likes)
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