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Ashkenazi the Pretty Good Veteran user Northern California 366 Posts |
So I had a nice day of gig (singular), and proceeded with date to nice b-day party for nice friend as guest. I brought along a trick for the hostess, because she likes magic.
I do the trick, and she asks me perhaps four times to do more, sometimes discretely, sometimes in front of other people. She also asks me to play the piano (a profession I've abandoned since I got tired of arguing to get paid $50/hr to play something that takes a couple of decades to get good at). So what might I tactfully have said? I demurred gently, and tried to laugh it off with comments about having not received a deposit. Had I been a tad grumpier, I might have said to this teacher, "Hey, how about you sit us down and go over subjunctive tenses for German & French - I frequently make mistakes." But I wasn't feeling aggressive. Most friends are more respectful, and offer to pay if they want me to perform. And please, don't tell me the error was mine for doing a trick in the first place. (Unless you really feel like it). Come-back lines that aren't too cruel, but put it in a way that a non-performer might "grock," are most welcome. Thanks in advance for thinking about it. Posted: Apr 19, 2010 2:46am ------------------------------- Don't all shout at once. :D
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sethb Inner circle The Jersey Shore 2719 Posts |
You were gracious and thoughtful, because you brought along a magic trick for someone who likes magic. The recipient obviously liked it and so she asked for more, perhaps not as tactfully as she might have. Since you had no obligation to perform at all, you simply should have said "Thanks for asking, I'm very flattered, but that was it for today."
This didn't strike me as a financial problem, just a social one. SETH
"Watch the Professor!!" -- Al Flosso (1895-1976)
"The better you are, the closer they watch" -- Darwin Ortiz, STRONG MAGIC |
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Thomas Wayne Inner circle Alaska 1977 Posts |
Quote:
On 2010-04-19 02:46, Ashkenazi The Pretty Good wrote: Hmmm... I get paid to consult for professional magicians, and I'm just visiting here on the forum as a guest. Are you suggesting that I (or others) should offer solutions to your professional problem for FREE, simply because I happen to be here enjoying the fruit punch? >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>><<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< That point made, how about considering this from an entirely different angle? Isn't it possible that the occasional gratis performance such as this one, on the happy occasion of a birthday party hosted by a [presumably] close friend, might actually be a very good business move? Surely there must have been some party attendees who; 1) occasionally host similar events, and 2) are unaware of your services, or are aware but have never engaged you. What a great opportunity to show prospective new clients how much a performance by you could also make their event a real hit. I mean, if you bring the house down (and subtly make it known that you are available for hire) I'd have to think that could very well lead to some new clients. PLUS, you'd be a real hero to your friend the hostess. Just another way to look at it, I suppose... TW
MOST magicians: "Here's a quarter, it's gone, you're an idiot, it's back, you're a jerk, show's over." Jerry Seinfeld
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Michael Baker Eternal Order Near a river in the Midwest 11172 Posts |
Where's the fruit punch? I missed it.
~michael baker
The Magic Company |
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Ashkenazi the Pretty Good Veteran user Northern California 366 Posts |
Hi Thomas!
1,793 posts is one heck of a visit! I didn't get any punch either, Michael. I DEMAND A REFUND! Wait! Never mind. AtPG
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Thomas Wayne Inner circle Alaska 1977 Posts |
Quote:
On 2010-04-19 14:31, Ashkenazi The Pretty Good wrote: Perhaps, but I'll bet you go to more birthday parties. TW
MOST magicians: "Here's a quarter, it's gone, you're an idiot, it's back, you're a jerk, show's over." Jerry Seinfeld
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Ashkenazi the Pretty Good Veteran user Northern California 366 Posts |
I'll trade you my next invitation for the definitive, all time, bottom-line, case-closed, all DVDs examined answer to the best way to do a double lift of all time.
I do in fact often do stuff for friends, but haven't found it leads to many gigs (despite effusive praise). I think that friends tend to see us/cast us as friends. Also, these were teachers: not a group famous for its massive disposable income. :D
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David Waldorf Regular user Minnesota 132 Posts |
At least you know you were entertaining enough for them to ask for more! They must have been hard up for entertainment to ask you to play piano as well. (No reflection on your skill at the keyboard.)
In regard to cruel comeback lines, you can be as cruel as you want, if it is funny. Ever see Groucho Marx? If they're your friends, you might not even get punched for it. Joking aside, if you have done anything close to a mental effect, you can pretend to be mentally worn out, or even deeply disturbed. By the way, I love Mark Twain, but I don't remember seeing that quote before.
Didn't your mother ever tell you not to believe anything you hear and only half of what you see?
From a Roy Rogers movie |
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seadog93 Inner circle 3200 Posts |
Quote:
I agree. You either want to do some magic or not.
"Love is the magician who pulls man out of his own hat" - Ben Hecht
"Love says 'I am everything.' Wisdom says 'I am nothing'. Between the two, my life flows." -Nisargadatta Maharaj Seadog=C-Dawg=C.ou.rtn.ey Kol.b |
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Marshall Thornside Inner circle chicago 2016 Posts |
Friend, acquaintance or even a new client.
I would politely give the excuse that I have another concert to leave for. I'll play 10 mins for the Alzheimer/Dementia section only if it's asked and within the time frame of performance. I never give more than what was stated in the terms. That's why I start my fees out high and figure on a price to factor that in.
you will remember my name
World's Youngest Illusionista 7th greatest pianist in the world Go Red For Women and Stroke Ambassador www.mai-ling.net |
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Al Angello Eternal Order Collegeville, Pa. USA 11045 Posts |
Why did you bring more than one trick with you if you intended to do only one trick?
Al Angello The Comic Juggler/Magician
http://www.juggleral.com http://home.comcast.net/~juggleral/ "Footprints on your ceiling are almost gone" |
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sb Special user 567 Posts |
When I am asked to do some magic - if I am not in the mood, or not prepared, or for whatever reason I don't want to do any now... I proceed to take off my finger, tell them that "this is my favorite trick, just not my best trick", and that's it. They asked for a trick, I did one. (I've actually done this line many times, and there is only one person - an acquaintance - who ALWAYS asks for more and tells me how lame the finger joke is.)
I've always wondered why we are the only hobby or profession that I can think of that is always asked to do some of it. You don't ask a doctor at a party to check your lungs, if you ask your mechanic friend to look at your car - you very well may be asked to pay. Even with the arts, you don't ask your friend in a band to sing a few songs, etc.... -sb |
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Ashkenazi the Pretty Good Veteran user Northern California 366 Posts |
Quote:
On 2010-04-21 16:21, Al Angello wrote: Where'd you get that? Posted: Apr 21, 2010 7:44pm And David, said quote was featured in the Ken Burns program on Mr. Twain, who walked the streets where I live some 150 years ago. To my knowledge, Twain never jogged on them. Not even once.
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Dannydoyle Eternal Order 21219 Posts |
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On 2010-04-21 18:06, sb wrote: I bet if you go to a party with Mai Ling and there is a piano in the room she is asked to play. I have SEEN mechanics at parties asked car questions. Perhaps magicians are the only ones so self important as to not be able to laugh it off. While the mechanic was not asked to bring out his tools so to speak, there was a serious interrigation going on.
Danny Doyle
<BR>Semper Occultus <BR>In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act....George Orwell |
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seadog93 Inner circle 3200 Posts |
Quote:
On 2010-04-21 18:06, sb wrote: I actually think that this is very incorrect. I think it's totally normal to ask a quick legal question of a lawyer, or medical question of a doctor or a car question of a mechanic. I have some professional musicians in my family and it's pretty regular for them to sing or play a little. I work in a library and people always ask me about library procedures when I'm not at work ...and I have no problem at all with it. Chiropractors are famous for loving their profession so much that want to give everyone a quick adjustment. Jeff McBride considers it a challenge, and part of his own magical training, to perform magic even when he doesn't really feel like it. I'm not recommending that myself, just some interesting food for thought. But if you just don't want to, then politely say your tired or that you'll do some another time or a little later Say you didn't bring anything. Ask if THEY know any tricks they could show you.
"Love is the magician who pulls man out of his own hat" - Ben Hecht
"Love says 'I am everything.' Wisdom says 'I am nothing'. Between the two, my life flows." -Nisargadatta Maharaj Seadog=C-Dawg=C.ou.rtn.ey Kol.b |
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Al Angello Eternal Order Collegeville, Pa. USA 11045 Posts |
So your plan was to go into your friends house and get paid for entertaining them without any previous agreement. I personaly would nerve to try that. I never work without a contract, and any free lance magic is always for free.
Al Angello The Comic Juggler/Magician
http://www.juggleral.com http://home.comcast.net/~juggleral/ "Footprints on your ceiling are almost gone" |
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Ashkenazi the Pretty Good Veteran user Northern California 366 Posts |
Al? What?
Please read the first posting again. I have no idea what you're talking about. BTW, when did you stop beating up the old lady next door to you? Cheers, AtPG Posted: Apr 22, 2010 12:43am So Al, just to be clear, a) I did not bring more than one trick to the party. (Again, where did you get that?) & b) I had no intention of getting paid. (Again, where did you get that?) Good night.
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Mentalist Sam Regular user 173 Posts |
I guess I don't see what the problem really is. It's not like it's difficult to perform. This isn't strenuous work. You don't have to haul in a case full of props and set up a sound system. Gather everyone around, do 3 things and you're done. Now you've created a lot of good will and made people very happy. What's wrong with that?
I get paid and I get paid very well to perform. But if I'm asked to do something I'm not going to say "ok, but only 10 minutes and I'm not going beyond that time frame". Sometimes you do things for other people without any sort of expectation that there is something for you in the end. And if there does have to be something for you, then use this as an opportunity to break in some new material. |
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Keith Raygor Special user Naples, FL 968 Posts |
No quality come-back lines yet, but I think sethb's answer, just after your initial post (you simply should have said "Thanks for asking, I'm very flattered, but that was it for today.") is the best answer.
And Thomas Wayne never fails to disappoint with his "I get paid to consult for professional magicians, and I'm just visiting here on the forum as a guest. Are you suggesting that I (or others) should offer solutions to your professional problem for FREE, simply because I happen to be here enjoying the fruit punch?" Ashkenazi the Pretty Good, you should have thought twice before coming to this magician's forum to ask questions. But as a professional magician, I now know of a consultant I can go to when I have questions. Well, except for questions about doing free magic at friend's events: "Isn't it possible that the occasional gratis performance such as this one, on the happy occasion of a birthday party hosted by a [presumably] close friend, might actually be a very good business move?" The answer to Thomas's question is no. |
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Dannydoyle Eternal Order 21219 Posts |
I will try to help Al. MY question is whay possibly would make you think that if you did just one trick for the hostess, and she liked it, (which we will pre suppose she will) do you expect her not to say anything? Really? Is that how little you think of yourself? OF COURSE SHE WILL TELL PEOPLE!
Parties are by their very nature places to have fun. You can enliven everyones night by dong magic or clangin on the piano, then there ya go it is more fun at the party. Do you want to charge your friends to have fun? If you don't want to do it then don't. Big deal. So next time you don't do ANYTHING for her and life moves on. (Hey maybe she only invited you BECAUSE you do those things huh?) I don't understand why magicians feeel so put upon when asked this. I don't walk about with magic tricks on me period. Someone at a party wants to see a trick, heck if they have cards ok no biggie. How big a deal is it really?
Danny Doyle
<BR>Semper Occultus <BR>In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act....George Orwell |
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