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The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Not very magical, still... » » "If you have a choice between being right, or being kind, choose kind." (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

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critter
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Spokane, WA
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A scorpion, being a very poor swimmer, asked a turtle to carry him on his back across a river. "You think I'm stupid?" exclaimed the turtle. "You'll sting me while I'm swimming and I'll drown."

"My dear turtle," laughed the scorpion, "if I were to sting you, you would drown and I would go down with you. Now where is the logic in that?"

"You're right!" cried the turtle. "Hop on!" The scorpion climbed aboard and halfway across the river gave the turtle a mighty sting. As they both sank to the bottom, the turtle resignedly said:

"Do you mind if I ask you something? You said there'd be no logic in your stinging me. Why did you do it?"

"It has nothing to do with logic," the drowning scorpion sadly replied. "It's just my character." --Braude, 1965
"The fool is one who doesn't know what you have just found out."
~Will Rogers
Stanyon
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Landrum, S.C. by way of Chicago
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Quote:
On 2010-11-29 12:38, stoneunhinged wrote:
This thread helped me make a decision today. Love, beer, and kisses to the Magic Café.

Anyway, here was the situation:

Thursday (Thanksgiving!) I showed up to one of my classes, exhausted from the week's work and feeling decidedly sad that not a single soul had said "Happy Thanksgiving" to me, and said, "I'm really not in the mood to teach today."

I then went on to play around a bit. I showed a couple of YouTube videos, told a few jokes and stories. Then I pulled myself up by the bootstraps and gave them some real teaching, making connections to the YouTube videos and the jokes and stories.

So yesterday I got an email from one of my students. It basically said that: 1) I gave a really poor lesson because I said I wasn't in the mood and because I digressed too much; 2) from now on he will now leave the lesson when he believes I am about to digress again.

Hm.

What to do with such an email? Yes, I have given many bad lessons in the past. All teachers have. Yes, this might have been a bad lesson. My bad. But when did students start writing emails of complaint for a single bad lesson? Assuming the lesson was truly bad, perhaps the kid could cut me some slack. I was teaching on Thanksgiving Day, for goodness' sake!

I immediately wrote a response. My wife said, "Don't send it. Think about it overnight."

I did.

Here is the text of what I wrote:

Quote:
Dear ********,

Your point is duly noted. I suppose I shall have to try to do better.

Best,
Jeff


In the end, I new I was right, but chose to be kind.

Next year, I won't say, "I'm not in the mood to teach today". I will say, "Please let me tell you about Thanksgiving in America. It is important to me."

If someone still complains, I'll still feel bad (I'm that way), but I'll have taken the high road.



Stony -

Why would anyone in your class wish you a Happy Thanksgiving? Is Thanksgiving even celebrated there? The Brits celebrate Thanksgiving, but they celebrate it on July 4th!

Belated Happy Thanksgiving!
Stanyon

aka Steve Taylor

"Every move a move!"

"If you've enjoyed my performance half as much as I've enjoyed performing for you, then you've enjoyed it twice as much as me!"
tommy
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Devil’s Island
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He who lives by the rule dies by the rule. Anyway I can't see me using it at the card table.
If there is a single truth about Magic, it is that nothing on earth so efficiently evades it.

Tommy
gaddy
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Agent of Chaos
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To me it's curious that, so often, the people who claim that sometimes it's kinder to be cruel are the more boorish, obnoxious, people on the magic Café.

Almost like it's an excuse or something...

Present company excepted, of course!
*due to The Magic Cafe's editorial policies, words on this site attributed to me cannot necessarily be held to be my own.*
Dannydoyle
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Yea it is as ironic as those who seem to be the most open, are only that open with things that directly involve them. Maybe an excuse just to act the way that they do huh?

Present company excepted, of course!
Danny Doyle
<BR>Semper Occultus
<BR>In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act....George Orwell
gaddy
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Agent of Chaos
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Quote:
On 2010-12-04 18:19, Dannydoyle wrote:
Yea it is as ironic as those who seem to be the most open, are only that open with things that directly involve them. Maybe an excuse just to act the way that they do huh?

Present company excepted, of course!
That's OK, Danny, you can call me out if you like. I don't mind. The reason I opine the way I do around here is because I really don't care about the opinions of most other magicians. It was a sad day for me the day I realized that the majority of magicians I've ever met (especially online) are people I'd really rather have very little to do with in real life. But what can you do, eh?

Short sighted, narrow minded and mean spirited is the way I can only describe this particular sort of person. Not naming anyone in particular, though.

But I certainly hope those people who's opinions I do actually value here are aware of and know that...
*due to The Magic Cafe's editorial policies, words on this site attributed to me cannot necessarily be held to be my own.*
Pakar Ilusi
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It is not just for the other person really that being kind is "important".

Being kind helps you as well. We don't live in a "bubble", people around you see you and what you do.

Today might be your day in the sunshine. Nothing ever lasts though, you will have your own moment when you err.

On the day that you might need to be "given a break" (even though you're in the wrong), someone being kind even though they're right will make this saying have a different meaning.

I find it hard to believe that you have never been given a break by someone when you made a mistake. (Meant for all...)

Smile
"Dreams aren't a matter of Chance but a matter of Choice." -DC-
Dannydoyle
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I treat people EXACTLY the way I wish to be treated.

gaddy, it is not too shocking. Mean spirited? I used to find it funny, and still do as a matter of fact, the number of magicians who will come in to a restaurant/bar that they know full well a magician is working and APPLY FOR THE JOB! I know this because it happens all the time. They talk trash and bash and undercut you and think it is just "competition" to do so. They are happy to do this.

I have VERY few friends in magic. I know lots of people, and we use many people to do the shows for us but very few friends. I am fortunate. Magic has always been a way to feed my family, not a hobby for me. I never did it for a hobby. This is why my view is almost always diametrically opposed to most "magicians".
Danny Doyle
<BR>Semper Occultus
<BR>In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act....George Orwell
stoneunhinged
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Quote:
On 2010-12-04 13:29, Stanyon wrote:

Why would anyone in your class wish you a Happy Thanksgiving?


Good question! I must assume that none of them even realized it was Thanksgiving, or they would have.

There is no Thanksgiving in Germany. Maybe that's what's wrong with this country. Smile

Seriously (and to be nice), many villages have their own annual harvest festival. Göttingen doesn't.

BTW, I told some of my colleagues the story yesterday, and none of them thought I should have been so nice. I didn't tell them about the Magic Café.
Magnus Eisengrim
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Sulla placed heads on
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What really strikes me about your student's note is that he cares about your class. Apparently a lot. For a student to be disappointed, you must have given him something to look forward to.

John
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.--Yeats
jem368
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^Agreed. Although it does depend on what type of person the student is (he might be that guy who has to call out anything he feels is beneath him)
The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Not very magical, still... » » "If you have a choice between being right, or being kind, choose kind." (0 Likes)
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