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MagicSanta Inner circle Northern Nevada 5841 Posts |
Found a poem I wrote over 20 years ago! God I suck....and nautical by nature
Many have a desire for fortune and fame And few will reach those goals Realizing that fame is but a ship Kept better off the shoals Lives of a showman Each must live Wading the shallows or riding the tide Introducing our art wherever we go So that while we may fail at least we have tried. |
landmark Inner circle within a triangle 5194 Posts |
Strange;
A little bird Nested in my window To tell me that All is not what it seems.
Click here to get Gerald Deutsch's Perverse Magic: The First Sixteen Years
All proceeds to Open Heart Magic charity. |
Josh the Superfluous Inner circle The man of 1881 Posts |
The pathetic tale of Josh #2 (reprinted from a tattoo on my back)
A Yakima Chi-Chi's was desperate one day to book some new talent, but they couldn't pay The balloon twisting clown said "No money, No deal! Perhaps you should contact that guy named Josh Riel" So management called, and woke up the lush "What!" his phone answered, with a belch and a flush He said he would do it, and they asked him "when?" He said "Around noon......if I'm sober by then" And then he walked in, at a quarter to four "I'm working for beer so make that tap pour!" His t-shirt was stained His fly was unzipped His pants would be tight (if the seat wasn't ripped) His hands were both empty he didn't have props They were used as exhibits by the Yakima cops The staff became nervous, not sure what to do They spaced out the tables so he could walk through After downing 12 beers, to his pocket he went and brought out some cards; stained, soggy and bent "Take one of these" he said "I wont peek" "Now put your name on it, while I take a leak" He went to the bathroom, and didn't come out His living condition, by the staff, was in doubt They pushed and they pushed and they pushed on the door But wedged up against it was Josh on the floor They put on some gloves and dragged the bum out the restroom was trashed, they started to shout He said "Take it easy.....everything' s cool. I left you a refund.....on the floor....in a pool."
What do you want in a site? "Honesty, integrity and decency." -Mike Doogan
"I hate it, I hate my ironic lovechild. I didn't even have anything to do with it" Josh #2 |
LobowolfXXX Inner circle La Famiglia 1196 Posts |
So much depends upon
Ahhhhhh, never mind.
"Torture doesn't work" lol
Guess they forgot to tell Bill Buckley. "...as we reason and love, we are able to hope. And hope enables us to resist those things that would enslave us." |
landmark Inner circle within a triangle 5194 Posts |
Quote:
On 2011-02-05 19:31, LobowolfXXX wrote: Hey! I like that poem!
Click here to get Gerald Deutsch's Perverse Magic: The First Sixteen Years
All proceeds to Open Heart Magic charity. |
MagicSanta Inner circle Northern Nevada 5841 Posts |
Landmark, you be brilliant. One day my NYC family will stop coming to California and I'll go there and we can go and have a hot dog.
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diehards2080 Loyal user Brooklyn, New York 256 Posts |
I like x-rated poems better or very suggestive ones. They always put a smile on my face
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ed rhodes Inner circle Rhode Island 2885 Posts |
Quote:
On 2011-02-05 19:04, MagicSanta wrote: Probably not the worst poem in the universe. Probably not even the fourth worst. Here's a list of the top three bad poets. (They spare you the example of Ms. Jennings poem about dead swans in the pond. "Vogon poetry is the third worst in the Universe. The second worst is that of the Azgoths of Kria. During a recitation by their Poet Master Grunthos the Flatulent, of his poem, Ode to a Small Lump of Green Putty I Found in My Armpit One Midsummer Morning, four of his audience members died of internal hemorrhaging, and the president of the Mid-Galactic Arts Nobbling Council, survived by gnawing one of his own legs off... The very worst poetry in the universe died along with its creator, Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings of Sussex... in the destruction of the planet Earth. Vogon poetry is mild by comparison."
"...and if you're too afraid of goin' astray, you won't go anywhere." - Granny Weatherwax
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Cliffg37 Inner circle Long Beach, CA 2491 Posts |
I sneezed a mighty sneeze,
A mighty sneeze I snoze, and when I sneezed my mighty sneeze, I loudly blew my nose. Written by me in 1976
Magic is like Science,
Both are fun if you do it right! |
Josh Chaikin Inner circle Kansas City 1430 Posts |
Since we're talking bad poetry, here are the two greatest (bad) poems of our time:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ci6Cw8W0Kn0 |
MagicSanta Inner circle Northern Nevada 5841 Posts |
The worse poems were written by the beats and 'on the road' types. Being in San Francisco around artist I was subjected to that crap.
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rossmacrae Inner circle Arlington, Virginia 2475 Posts |
A handsome young man from Nantucket...
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Pakar Ilusi Inner circle 5777 Posts |
Quote:
On 2011-02-05 19:04, MagicSanta wrote: "So that while we may fail at least we have tried." I like it, Santa...
"Dreams aren't a matter of Chance but a matter of Choice." -DC-
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