I once made an expensive diamond ring disappear with the idea of having it reappear in a sealed container. It was a gospel message and the ring was to be the risen Christ and the sealed container, the sealed upper room.

When the spectator opened the container I asked him to describe what he saw. He mentioned various food items but no ring. I finally asked, and is there anything in there that looks like a ring? He said, "Nope!" I looked and saw that he was correct. I replied, "And Jesus wasn't where He was expected to be either!" After the laugh I found the ring for the lady and went on...

I like, "Let's have a moment of silence for this failed trick."

I usually say something like, "It's all part of the show, folks...the part that hasn't been rehearsed."

"I forgot to compensate for the rotational effects of the earth."

"The real magician will be here shortly."

"Let's have a moment of silence for this failed trick."

"The real magician will be here shortly".

Ahhhhhhhhhh!!! These are the BEST! Thanks for such a great thread, everyone!

If it is a card trick regardless of whether I messed up or the spec is fooling around I say, "I'm wrong? I am never wrong. There was one time when I thought I was wrong but I was mistaken."

Everything else I just say the same line as Bill Palmer. Gee I love that line.

After I messed up a card trick I said, "Well, I guess I shouldn't practice in front of my two-year-old daughter. Well, she likes this one too, and I think I have it down." I then take out my keys and shake them in front of them. This got a great reaction, although it was at a PTA meeting.

This came out on the fly one show and I keep it in my back pocket at all times. If something goes unmistakably awry I stare in disbelief. Pause. Then as I scrap whatever it is I was working with I say, "Last time I buy something from MagicTricks.com."

Came up with it working with a crappy head chopper. The secret part fell out on the ground leaving the entire effect exposed and the volunteer still on his knees staring down at it. Funny, I sold the thing on magictricks.com the next week.

Usually I always manage to come up with something. One time I remember when turning the card over to have the wrong selection I took another one out and another, then I said, "Don't worry, only 48 left to go. I'm sure I'll find it sooner or later."

Another sure fire way which I found is to have a printout in your pocket which has written large on the front THE EASY TO DO CARD TRICK WHICH NEVER FAILS and some diagrams of hands and instuctions on the other side. I look at them for a couple of second as if figuring out where I went wrong. Then I get a Sharpie out and cross out NEVER FAILS.

Sniper. That's a killer. LOL

"TAXI!"

Adz

"If you think that was a mistake you shoulda seen my first wife..."

"Sorry folks, it's in my contract to mess that one up."

Our show is 75 percent juggling so we don't have much magic that can go wrong. Magicians always tell me how easy it is for me to make a joke about a juggling mistake and how hard it is for magicians. My theory is jugglers have more room for error and we have to get good at covering mistakes. But he was right. It is easier for the audience to forgive a juggler if he then succeeds at the trick. With magic, if it is already busted, how can you go on?

To stay with the forum topic...

The end of our opener can be very tricky. A lot can go wrong and sometimes does. Now I think openers are more important than finales. They set the pace for the whole show. If you open strong the audience is going to be with you more throughout the whole show. So blowing the opener is a bad thing but it happens. When it does we walk down stage.

Will: Welcome to live theater folks.

Wally: Sometimes we mess up.

Will: By the end, you'll be used to it.

Not really a joke but it works for us. We have a ton of drop jokes but that is the only one I can think of that could work with magic.

Another good one I just thought of. I think this is stock.

"Just like a well oiled machine... Made in Taiwan."

Funny Will, I have a stiff rope that won't go stiff and I use the line that it's "Made in China"! I can get away with it because we are living in Taiwan, and many of the cheaper stuff is now made in China rather than Taiwan.

JoJo

"Gee, it worked in rehearsal..."

"Well, you knew I wasn't Copperfield when I got up here!"

My version on The Village Idiots post: "That's the last time I buy magic stuff on Ebay..."

"I got that trick from Copperfield...and was he glad to get rid of it."

"Hey, they can't all be gems at these prices."

"What do you think I am...a MAGICIAN?!"

"What did you expect? You got in here for free, didn't you? (No they didn't) Really?! Boy, did YOU get gypped..."

"Mom told me there'd be days like this...never said there'd be so **** many of them in a row, though."

"Makes me sorry I quit Med School."

"One more time and I go back to the home."

My favorite one was impromptu about two years ago (too dated to use now). A balloon burst as I was inflating it. I picked up the pieces, looked at them closely.
"Figures...Firestone."

I also keep a copy of Magic for Dummies handy and refer to it when something goes wrong.

Dan Wolfe, aka. "The Amazing EARL"

"It works at home..."

I was doing "You Do Like I Do" at a party and I realized that I was in trouble after a missed move but I continued with the trick knowing that I had a one-in-52 chance of staying alive. My victim turned his card and I turned mine. They were identical! Hey, always push the odds... sometimes you win! Don't drop the gag line until it's absolutely necessary... it might not be.

Anyone want to buy a second hand trick?—Cheap!

It worked when I bought it.

I do a combination of an ambitious card and then letting five or so specs select the same card. One of the guys I was showing it to the other night grabbed the pack to see how many of the cards were the same and then shuffled it and took out a card and said now it is impossible.

My response as I took back the pack was "nothing is impossible" with a smile but I was thinking what an ****. Then he turned the card over. One in 52 sometimes happens. LOL

Take out a piece of paper marked 'instructions' and read aloud, "This trick will not work on a (day of the week) at the (venue) for (name of client)'s party." This usually gets a laugh.

Is there a magician in the house???!!!

I got this one out of Magic For Dummies.

The man in the magic shop said it was foolPROOF.