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Zephury Elite user Hollywood, FL 488 Posts |
It's a work in progress... I'm working on my own website.
I'm making an "about" page; I'm just kinda stumped on how I should write it. Should it be in 1st or 3rd person perspective? Right now, I open the page with "My name is Harley Salas, and I'm a professional close-up and parlour magician from Port Saint Lucie, Florida." I'm just not feeling it! I need to come up with a profession looking page and I suppose I need some more help writing this thing out. Any points you guys can give me? Good things to add in or whichever? I don't have a ton of experience, so I can't say that I've had x amount of years of experience, nor have I had any "Huge shows" so, it's difficult to create a selling point for me. I hope you guys get what I mean, but if you'd like to see what I've got so far (which is a work in progress, please don't judge me too hard on it, I'm going to get some film and pictures up there soon as well) http://harleysalas.com/ Thanks! |
CraigMcK New user Only managed 50 Posts |
Hi Zephury,
I had a quick look at your site. In answer to your 1st question it depends upon how you want to come across. 1st person tends to be more relaxed, informal, whereas 3rd person is a little more formal, or business-like. Of course this is just a generalisation. You seem to have gone for a more classic, minimalistic look which tends to be more associated with the latter scenario. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying it doesn't work I'm just pointing out design convention. Then again rules are there to be broken! Just to throw a spanner in the works but.... Do you really need 3 separate pages? What is wrong with a single landing page containing all the relevant info? Finally (you'll be glad to hear) the only thing, IMHO, that I think you need to state a little more explicitly is what geographic area are you happy to work in? Is it just locally in Port St Lucie, the whole Florida state or further afield? Hope some of this helps! One thing to remember is that there is no right or wrong regarding what you put on your site. Look at others' for inspiration and ideas. Think how you want your site to come across and just go for it! |
Jay Store New user UK 30 Posts |
Hi Zephury,
I can never quite see the point when people pick up needlessly on minor grammatical or spelling errors in posts on Fora [sic - the pl. of Forum, for the pedants out there] like this, however... While you say that your website is a work in progress, it really is worth eliminating typographical errors at every stage. You never know when a potential employer might view it, and speaking from a non-magical perspective I have vetoed job candidates in the past on the basis that the website on their resume contained a readily rectifiable error. I hope that you will appreciate that I say this to help you not to criticise you. For example in your paragraph on Close-Up Magic, 'tradition' should be 'traditional', end of paragraph superfluous 'r' after the full-stop. I advise students - again in a non-magical context - to have someone else check through their work: after a while you can't see your own errors. I know this isn't quite addressing your questions, but I hope it is useful, and very best wishes. Jay |
erikdobell Regular user Gatlinburg Tennessee 139 Posts |
I can help out with the About Me page. PM me if you're still interested.
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charliemartin Special user Rapid City, SD 792 Posts |
Maybe a clip..not more than 3 minutes of you performing in front of an audience. For magicians we know who is Jeff McBride and Eugene Burger, but to laymen, they are just names on a page. Where have you worked? Any special shows you have done? And I agree about location, where will you work?
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