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Twitch New user Buckley, WA 80 Posts |
Hey all,
This last weekend I went with my church on our annual winter youth retreat as a counselor and I'm known for doing magic all the time. Well one particular night I was performing some effects and I thought I would perform some that I rarely performed in public. In this were 2 effects involving razor blades one being the classic razor blade illusion and then Andrew Mayne's bloody fun card trick. While everybody loved them and the reactions were great my girlfriend (who didn't even know I did these) was in shock and seriously upset about them and for the rest of the night couldn't even look at me she was that freaked out. Now my question is this, under the circumstances I want to tell her the method behind them so she knows that I'm not endangering myself in anyway. I take exposure very seriously and I've never told a single person about the effects I perform and while I want to hold to that I love this person and she's been the biggest supporter in my magical career and to ease her mind I want to tell her. What would one do in this situation? Tell the one you love to ease her mind or expose and compromise your values as a performer? Josh |
Margarette Special user Memphis area 956 Posts |
I get reactions like this all the time when I perform certain escape stunts. Now, I do not do the "challenge" type escapes because that is now how I perform. What I tell these people is something like "Do you honestly think I would put myself in a position that would leave my kids without a mother?" I assure them that I know and am capable of doing everything I say I can.
If you don't want to go into any type of exposure, just do your best to reassure that you know what you are doing and you'd never do anything that would put yourself in danger. Just my two cents! Margarette
The only stupid question is the one not asked.
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Peter Marucci Inner circle 5389 Posts |
Josh,
Margarette's advice is right on. If you are worried about exposure, strongly sell the point that you would never do anything that would endanger yourself and that, after all, everything you do in the magic world is an illusion -- a trick, if you will -- designed to appear real. |
dpe666 Inner circle 2895 Posts |
It probably won't matter either way. I have always done effects that APPEARED dangerous, and even when they knew the secret, the women in my life HATED my performing them. There is always that thought in their mind, "...but what IF something goes wrong?" Do as Margarette advised, and keep the secret to yourself.
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Reis O'Brien Inner circle Seattle, WA 2467 Posts |
This doesn't sound like concern, this sounds like anger. I mean, she couldn't even look at you? Is it possible that her real issue with the performance was that it may have been a little intense for a church youth group? Just a thought.
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daffydoug Eternal Order Look mom! I've got 14077 Posts |
I was thinking along the same lines as Fire dice. It is a strong possibility.
Read the Gospel Magic section to hear about my similar experience performing for Church folks. I strongly suspect that may be at the heart of the problem.
The difficult must become easy, the easy beautiful and the beautiful magical.
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Twitch New user Buckley, WA 80 Posts |
You know I thought it was that she was angry at me to for doing somthing that might be taken as too intense for the kids, but then after talking to her she was just so distrot she seriously thought I was hurting myself. Thanks all for the good advice and I had taken her out to dinner and sat down and talked with her about it and explained to her that I would never do anything that would cuase serious harm to myself. She took it well and after a short conversation we came to an understanding,
josh |
Dave Egleston Special user Ceres, Ca 632 Posts |
Time to get you a new girlfriend -
I may be off mark, but I'm taking it for granted you are not a teenager (bad assumption on this board). Unless this girl is brand new in your life - she doesn't seem to know you very well. What did the rest of the audience think? I was VERY active in my youth group at church (million years ago). There was very little naiveté in that group. We knew what was what. Was the recalcitrant attitude soothed after an evening out? There may be a cause and effect there. Of course if you and your girlfriend are in your early to mid-teens, that's a whole different forum. You probably got "played". Dave |
Reis O'Brien Inner circle Seattle, WA 2467 Posts |
Twitch,
I'm glad to hear things worked out for you two! Open communication is the key! And yes, buying her dinner helps too! |
Bill Hegbli Eternal Order Fort Wayne, Indiana 22797 Posts |
You should never never keep anything from your the one whom you are involved with, spouse or serious girlfriend.
This is a bad thing in a relationship. I believe you are carring the code beyond its intent. And you should not perform the Razor Blades for "today's" kids. It seems they are quite different then we were. The copy anything. Haven't you heard of the kids jumping off building because they saw it on television. With the lack of the traditional family, they are left to make bad decisions on their own. |
Twitch New user Buckley, WA 80 Posts |
I can see what some of you are saying, as to me breaking up wit her over this I'd rather stop doing the illusion then throwing away the last year of my life with her. I'm not a teenager I'm 22 and I've been in and out of a few relationships but not one where somthing I did performance wise caused alittle tention. And after sometime to go back and reflect on the performance of the razor blades (and after seeing the video) I played it up quite a bit, the audience loved it and I can say with full confidence that none of them will try it on they're own( mosty cuase I've known most of them since before they got into to highschool and they know if they do try it I'll be on there door step ready slap them silly for bieng stupid).
As for taking my girlfriend out I do that every friday night, it's the only night of the week that we actully have time to just go out and spend an evening together so it wasn't like she acted that way so I'd take it out, I do it anyways. The big problem here was and I don't know might be in the future again is the simple fact that somtimes what we as magi do looks far to real (especially the dangerous stuff) we know its a trick or a gimmick but are loved ones don't. And I personally don't think I'm taking the code beyond it's intent I love to see the look on her face whenever I do a card trick or some new routine I've worked out. I know the eposure thing gets tossed around alot and somtimes it gets old quick but I think we've all wonderd at what point to we break that if the illusion we give hurts or in my case downright scares the ones we care about? I take this art very seriously and I love Margarette and Peters advice but I'm not sure if that will always solve the problem. Josh |
dpe666 Inner circle 2895 Posts |
I performed for my church youth group when I was young, and for it I was shunned and cast aside. The woman who was in charge of teaching the girls spent an entire Sunday School class teaching the girls why I should be avoided.
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Dave Egleston Special user Ceres, Ca 632 Posts |
Quote:
On 2004-02-21 23:07, dpe666 wrote: Was she wrong??? Dave |
Twitch New user Buckley, WA 80 Posts |
Yeah nobody especilly a person in charge of teaching kids about God should judge somebody like that. I'm sorry to hear that happend.
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landmark Inner circle within a triangle 5194 Posts |
<<I'm sorry to hear that happened. >>
Oh, please. Dave's gotten a whole career out of it! See his signature. Jack Shalom
Click here to get Gerald Deutsch's Perverse Magic: The First Sixteen Years
All proceeds to Open Heart Magic charity. |
dpe666 Inner circle 2895 Posts |
Yeah, what Jack said.
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Twitch New user Buckley, WA 80 Posts |
Yeah, he did get a career out of it but still I wouldn't want that to happen to me when I was young.
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dpe666 Inner circle 2895 Posts |
I did not say that at the time it did not hurt. I do not wish it on anyone, but it did develope who I am in magic. Now, when people become afraid of me for the things I can do, I tend to relish it.
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