The Magic Café
Username:
Password:
[ Lost Password ]
  [ Forgot Username ]
The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Not very magical, still... » » Poems... (0 Likes) Printer Friendly Version

GypsyPirate
View Profile
Regular user
110 Posts

Profile of GypsyPirate
A Limmerick entitled "Waffle-Boy: the Breakfast Monkey"


Breakfast is my favorite meal,
There is nothing to eat more ideal,
I’ll give you fair warning,
When I wake ‘n the morning,
I’ll kill for a bowl of oatmeal!

Or perhaps some hash browns and bacon,
Will hit the spot after I have awaken,
With some season and spice,
They taste very nice,
A special recipe that is Jamaican.

But my fav’rite could be the waffle,
I certainly don’t think that they’re awful,
In fact I think they’re great,
On my breakfast plate,
Much better than any falafel.

I also like steak that is fried,
With scrambled eggs sitting beside,
I tell the waiters,
To add fried potaters
Just pile ‘em up on the side!

And, ahh, the beloved sweet rolls,
Pastries, and doughnuts with holes,
In my mouth I’m a-stuffin’,
The blueberry muffin,
That sat next to my cereal bowls.

Heaven is an All-You-Can-Eat,
With over six types of all breakfast meat!
And when they ask me “Toast?”
I always boast,
“I’ll take normal white, not weird wheat.”

French toast and pancakes in syrup,
And a big glass of milk that I slurup,
I think I’m almost done,
My pant button’s undone,
And I let out a slight little “bur-up.”


Mark Cavaliere (Copyright 2003)
Magic Mark

"How'd you do that?" ... "Very carefully."
Reis O'Brien
View Profile
Inner circle
Seattle, WA
2467 Posts

Profile of Reis O'Brien
There was an old man from Nantucket...
Homo vult decipi; decipiatur

http://www.myspace.com/liar_4_hire
NeoMagic
View Profile
Inner circle
I have...
2017 Posts

Profile of NeoMagic
Who fell head first in a bucket...
See and download my latest free card-suits-themed desktop wallpaper | HERE
ChrisZampese
View Profile
Veteran user
Hamilton, NZ
341 Posts

Profile of ChrisZampese
The buckets sides split...
The most beautiful experience we can have is the mysterious. It is the fundamental emotion which stands at the cradle of true art and true science. Whoever does not know it and can no longer wonder, no longer marvel, is as good as dead, and his eyes are
James F
View Profile
Inner circle
Atlanta
1096 Posts

Profile of James F
"Nothing Gold Can Stay"

Nature's first green is gold
Her hardest hue to hold
Her early leaf's a flower
But only so an hour
Then leaf subsides to leaf
So Eden sank to grief
So dawn goes down to day
Nothing gold can stay

Robert Frost
NeoMagic
View Profile
Inner circle
I have...
2017 Posts

Profile of NeoMagic
Quote:
There was an old man from Nantucket

Who fell head first in a bucket

The bucket's sides split


But using his wit...
See and download my latest free card-suits-themed desktop wallpaper | HERE
GlenD
View Profile
Inner circle
LosAngeles, Ca
1298 Posts

Profile of GlenD
Guess no one can follow this s***.

Oh well, it did seem to have died.
"A miracle is something that seems impossible but happens anyway" - Griffin

"Any future where you succeed, is one where you tell the truth." - Griffin (Griffin rocks!)
abc
View Profile
Inner circle
South African in Taiwan
1081 Posts

Profile of abc
Quote:
On 2004-06-04 10:13, GlenD wrote:
Guess no one can follow this s***.


Amen.
constantine
View Profile
Regular user
Memphi, on the Mighty Muddy
189 Posts

Profile of constantine
Doubtless, the pleasure is as great
Of beinging cheated as to cheat;
As lookers-on feel most delight,
That least preceive a juggler's slight,
And still the less thay understand,
The more th' admire his slight of hand.

Samual Butler 1663
Constatine 49%er
“The way of the transgressor is hard—to quit.”
—Jefferson Randolph “Soapy” Smith
Reis O'Brien
View Profile
Inner circle
Seattle, WA
2467 Posts

Profile of Reis O'Brien
Quote:
On 2004-06-02 22:32, AJOJRF wrote:
"Nothing Gold Can Stay"

Nature's first green is gold
Her hardest hue to hold
Her early leaf's a flower
But only so an hour
Then leaf subsides to leaf
So Eden sank to grief
So dawn goes down to day
Nothing gold can stay

Robert Frost


Oh Jeeze! I remember that from The Outsiders!
Homo vult decipi; decipiatur

http://www.myspace.com/liar_4_hire
abc
View Profile
Inner circle
South African in Taiwan
1081 Posts

Profile of abc
A Boozer's Tale



I never drink beer on a Monday,
Cos Monday's the day fer mi health
An' the wife's got me countin' them units,
I've just got to take care o' miself
So I merely have wine wi' mi supper,
An' just the one litre OK?
Then a rather large rum in mi coffee
An' I calls that mi sensible day

I never drink wine on a Tuesday,
Cos Tuesday's mi weightwatchin' club
It's the day when I eat nowt but cabbage,
The day I don't go much fer grub
Now a diet demands plenty fluid,
Summat light an' completely fat-free
So I've chosen that strong German lager
An' I just have five pints wi' mi tea

I never drink lager on Wednesday,
Cos Wednesday's the day fer mi jog
It's tracksuit an' trainers at mid-day
Then I'm off up the road wi' the dog
First stop's at the Globe fer some Guinness,
Three swift ones'll get me to grips
Then I carry on round to The Shepherds
Fer three more an' a burger an' chips
I make sure that I'm suitably rested,
Then I sprint back to our garden wall
In a time of under twelve minutes,
An' it's four 'undred metres an' all

I never drink Guinness on Thursday,
Cos Thursday's mi day to relax
I likes to sit out in t' back garden
In mi brown zip-up cardie an slacks
After lunch I might stroll by the river,
Breeze in at the Fisherman's Drop
Where I lounge on the terrace all lordly,
Sippin' shandy, but beawt any pop
Then cos I've been good through the day like,
She'll allow me to waver a smidge
So mi evenin's spent watchin' the footy
Wi' a few packs o' Boddies from t' fridge

I never drink Boddies on Friday,
Cos Friday's mi night on the razz
An' we meet in The Firkin at seven,
Owd Nodger an' me an' Fat Baz
Oh The Firkin's a beer-drinker's heaven,
Wi' fifteen real ales from the jug
An' we start wi' the ones in the tap-room
An' we works our way round to the snug
By midnight we're all talkin' gubbins
An' we're off fer a curry up town
But there's summat not reyt about curry
Cos I never seem t' keep the stuff down
We 'ave a good laugh wi' the waiters,
An' Baz moons his bum fer a joke
Then I'm home fer a nightful o' passion,
Cos I'm known as a passionate bloke

I never do much on a Sat'day,
Cos Sat'day's mi time fer a think
Cos me an' the wife are not speakin' today,
I'm a drunken, fat pig an' I stink
So I sit near the lavvie pretendin'
That really I'm feelin' just great
But I'm goin' right off that Indian food
If it leaves me in this bloody state
It's later I make the decision,
On my forty-third trip to the bog
There's only one thing cures an upset like this
An' they call it the 'air o' the dog
I ring Nodge an' Baz on mi mobile
An' both of 'ems likewise in pain
So we're back in The Firkin at quarter-past-six
An' we do it all over again

I never say Firkin on Sunday,
Cos Sunday's mi day to repent
I'm ashamed of all o' that boozin' I've done
An' all o that money I've spent
I begs the wife fer forgiveness
An' I promise I'll alter mi ways
An' she gives me a kiss an' a cuddle,
Like she did in our newly-wed days
We watch Songs of Praise on the telly,
Then a nice pot o' tea an' some cakes
An' I swear now I've climbed up the ladders,
I'll never slide down any snakes
But it's borin' on telly on Sunday,
An' I can't say I'm ever impressed
So I 'ave a walk out round the village
An' stop off at the Collier's Rest
Now the beer's a bit crap in The Collier's
So I leave an' pop round to The Swan
Where I flatten a shed-load o' Tetley's
An' I'm bloody well back to square one


So I never drink beer on a Monday,
Cos Monday's the day fer mi health
An' the wife's got me countin' them units
I've just got to take care o' miself





Copyright; Steve Morris

This is the story of my life!!!
GypsyPirate
View Profile
Regular user
110 Posts

Profile of GypsyPirate
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Sugar is sweet,
And honey is sweet also.
Magic Mark

"How'd you do that?" ... "Very carefully."
The Magic Cafe Forum Index » » Not very magical, still... » » Poems... (0 Likes)
[ Top of Page ]
All content & postings Copyright © 2001-2021 Steve Brooks. All Rights Reserved.
This page was created in 0.26 seconds requiring 5 database queries.
The views and comments expressed on The Magic Café
are not necessarily those of The Magic Café, Steve Brooks, or Steve Brooks Magic.
> Privacy Statement <

ROTFL Billions and billions served! ROTFL