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Profile of Magic_streak
How do you get funny lines? Joke books? Natural humour? Something you heard somewhere?
There are so many things we find funny that others don't. How do we gather jokes that most people will enjoy and include them in our patter? Let your thoughts and ideas flow...
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Profile of mormonyoyoman
We all get them from a warehouse in Buffalo, NY.

- or -

In my case, a childhood of Marx Brothers movies, Lee/Ditko's Spider-Man, Crosby/Hope "Road" movies, Richard Armour books, Lewis Carroll books, Mark Twain books.... You may see a pattern emerging.
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Mike Wild
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RE: "We all get them from a warehouse in Buffalo, NY"

I know where that place is... It's like 2 miles away from my house Smile Just kidding... There's nothing funny here in the frozen tundra, except perhaps our accents! Lucky for me I spent so many years in Boston! Now I speak wicked good.


<><>< SunDragon Magic ><><>

"Question Reality... Create Illusion"
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This is a joke, not a real website, but I couldn't resist.
Paula Jay - Magic to Remember -
I once wrote a book on elephants, I think paper would have been better.
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Profile of sniper1
It depends. On my behalf, I'm a perverse thinker in a sort of way. That means somebody explains a situtation and in my head little green guys take that situation and hack at it with their tiny hammers until they make it into something perverse, in a comic way. Like around 2 weeks ago I was with a magician friend of mine and we were brainstorming about an illusion show, and the theme is around "The Wizard of Oz". So there is this illusion where a guy walks in dressed as a scarecrow with hay coming from all the parts of his body. Then he lays on the table and the wizard hacks him to pieces with a hatchet, with straw flying all over, and the guy dressed as the scarecrow off course has dissapeared. NOW while he was telling me this in my head the little green men happened to be doing overtime work, and I was imagining him doing this illusion and I suddenly walk on stage with a Hoover and start hooving and sweeping all the straw from the stage.

And another thing is comedy bits on the TV. Even lines said on movies, my mind seems to absorb them and keep them in there until wanted. Hehe.
C Christian
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Profile of C Christian
From the grand old masters of the past...IE Buster Keaton all the way up to Steve Martin. You can get great lines from movies of today as well. Just keep an open mind and if anything strikes you funny write it down that is the key!! Cheers Chris
Vibono Magic
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Profile of Vibono Magic
I like watching great comedy from performers like Buster Keaton, the Marx brothers, Charlie Chaplin, the Muppets, Charlie Rivel, Joe Jackson Jr. But also from the so called music and comedy from Billy Connely, Spike Jones and his Fabulous City Slikers.
Vibono Mirage
Magic entertainer and Balloon artist
The Donster
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Instead of the hoover why not a shop-vac. Don,
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Profile of Regan
Paula found the website and here is the phone number.


Please do not call that number...this is only a joke.


A lot of humourous situations come up in normal, everyday life sometimes.

Mister Mystery
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Profile of tgcramer38
Look at your own life. There is nothing funnier. No life is so borring that there are'nt moments that can be spoofed. I am always looking for the funny.
Writing funny like everything else, it takes practice. Write ten funny things a day. Most of them will be ka ka do de, but theres always that one.
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Profile of sniper1
Yeah I perfectly agree with tgcramer38. I mean take everyday situations and see what can you make out of them. For example, picking up women. Have you ever noticed what men do? There is this beautifull girl dancing and suddenly she is sourrounded by about 6 men trying to dance around her and when she looks at one he usually looks the other way with a "It wasnt me" expression.

And what about yourselves? There is this great looking girl you spent the last 45 minutes staring at her and thinking what to say and when finally the right phrase comes up, you see her going out of the nightclub. And what about the ladies? Why do they go in pairs to the toilet. Well this is what they say, "you know what? That guy with the biker jacket was looking at you.", "Ohhhhhh really? Ect, ect". Men on the other hand just go in, stand there, and the most common thing that will happen is to look from the corner of your eye and say to yourself, "Hmmmm. I think this guy was one of gods favorite selections".

Well... you get the point.
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Profile of Macbeth
I seem to live in my own little world where funny just pops into my head!

I remember my wife asking me to do the dishes and before I'd even thought of it I had said "Sweetheart I can see your lips moving, but all I can hear is Blah, Blah Blah!"

The worst was performing a kids show and whilst using an expanding magic wand I said "It's not the size of your wand that matters but what you do with it!"

The parents laughed and the kids couldn't figure out why! Phew!
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Profile of Wolflock
Funny? This is the really serious and tragic side of my life! don't laugh. Why are you laughing?....
(Fade to black)
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Profile of NJJ
Usually, they come from funny off the cuff remarks that I or my audience's say that make their way into my act. However, I do have one or two stock lines in my act....
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Profile of ruaturtle
It's these little voices in my head...
I have found that I do not suffer from insanity... instead I rather enjoy it! : )

Poodle... the other white meat.
Bill Ligon
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Profile of Bill Ligon
I have a little garden in the back yard with funny line plants growing there. I just go out and pick a few.
Author of THE HOLY ART: Bizarre Magick From Naljorpa's Cave. NOW IN HARDCOVER! VIEW: <BR> ORDER:
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Profile of Boat are a few some great books....

anything by Gene Perret, look on his website.

Steve Shrott's Comedy Course published by Hades Publications. ( I took his course...great.)

Judy Gordon's book. Not sure who published.
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Profile of jkvand
I also read the comics in the newspaper, and often find funny lines in those. They're usually not the type that I can just pull out as is and use in my show, but they have humorous concepts that I can work into my show. Not often, but every now and then one jumps out at me. Also, Readers Digest has a lot of funny stories in it that are often real-life situations.
Skip Way
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Profile of Skip Way
Sniper1 is right on target. I also highly recommend Jerry Seinfeld's video documentary "Comedian". I carry a digital recorder with me everywhere I go. You never know when an hilarious idea or premise is going to pop up...and if you don't capture it immediately, it will disappear forever like a wisp of smoke. I frequent street Cafés, malls, amusement centers, parks...anyplace that I can sit and watch human interaction...then I watch for the unusual. I record notes on misworded signs, incongruent joinings, spoken statements, fashion fauxs, stupid news name it. I then dedicate an hour every morning, straight out of bed before my brain starts working, to sit, transcribe and play with the recordings from the day before. Sometimes I'll have to write several pages before I get a single joke that appeals to me. (For example...have you ever noticed that the side effects for medication used to combat social anxiety includes diarrhea, vomitng and cramps? That'll make you a real hit at your next party. And I've been using that pill I've seen on TV for two weeks now. I still can't throw a football through that dang tire...but my wife seems a lot happier.) Then you have to audience test it and refine it until you have a killer bit. It takes time and effort to be the best. Once your closest comedy club adn ask about stand-up comedy classes. Once you learn the techniques, writing comedy that works for and defines you becomes much, much easier.

:o) Skip
How you leave others feeling after an Experience with you becomes your Trademark.

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