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harris Inner circle Harris Deutsch 8812 Posts |
When you are introduced what do you give the M.C.
My latest is short and sweet. Please Welcome Harris Deutsch Counselor Laughologist and Brad Pitt's Stunt Double. When I come out they see someone who more closely resembles Jason Alexander George From Seinfield and other TV sitcoms Be safe and creative. Write, ReWrite ReWRite REWRITE....... Harris
Harris Deutsch aka dr laugh
drlaugh4u@gmail.com music, magic and marvelous toys http://magician.org/member/drlaugh4u |
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paulajayne Inner circle London England 1160 Posts |
Now as Einstein said.
E=MC x MC (MC Squared) Now "E" is a drug that is EVIL SO Evil = MC x MC (MC Squared) Therefore MC = Root of Evil Our MCs name tonight is Fred Bloggs So Fred Bloggs is the root of all evil Paula
Paula Jay - Magic to Remember -
--------------------------------- I once wrote a book on elephants, I think paper would have been better. ---- |
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The Donster Inner circle 4817 Posts |
I'm thinking of one way of being introduced which should be good.
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harris Inner circle Harris Deutsch 8812 Posts |
PaulaJayne,
Now that's an introduction. Sounds like you have the "MC" Hammer(ed) Thanks for sharing. Harris
Harris Deutsch aka dr laugh
drlaugh4u@gmail.com music, magic and marvelous toys http://magician.org/member/drlaugh4u |
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The Donster Inner circle 4817 Posts |
And if she doesn't have the MC Hammered... who knows... the MC might get Hammered.
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harris Inner circle Harris Deutsch 8812 Posts |
Can't touch that....
Harris
Harris Deutsch aka dr laugh
drlaugh4u@gmail.com music, magic and marvelous toys http://magician.org/member/drlaugh4u |
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paulajayne Inner circle London England 1160 Posts |
Glad you liked it.
LOL Paula
Paula Jay - Magic to Remember -
--------------------------------- I once wrote a book on elephants, I think paper would have been better. ---- |
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The Donster Inner circle 4817 Posts |
Or the MC could Drink WET CEMENT and Get STONED
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Rupert Bair Inner circle ? 2179 Posts |
Donster I know about reusing jokes..... but geez lol.
Matt |
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The Donster Inner circle 4817 Posts |
Hey what do you expect from the Cheese State Cheesy as can be
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RonCalhoun Special user Independence, KY USA 599 Posts |
Founder Heroin Doesn't Care. Find us on https://www.facebook.com/heroindoesntcare
www.heroindoesntcare.com |
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Caleb Wiles Inner circle Indianapolis, IN 1132 Posts |
Paulajayne, this really isn't an intro but it is a funny little mathematical equation like the one you mentioned.
If we assume that Girls = Time X Money Time = Money ("Time is money") By subsituting, we get Girls = Money X Money = Money squared We also know that Money = square root of evil ("Money is the root of all evil") If we square both sides of this equation, we get Money squared = evil Substituting once more, we get Girls = Evil I've always thought this was funny. I hope it's understandable. It was hard to write without using mathematical symbols. Caleb
Check out my Main Event project (DVD or Download).
"Magicians, stop what you're doing right now and pick this up!" - John Guastaferro "Caleb Wiles is the real deal!" - David Williamson "...my very highest recommendation." - John Carey |
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sniper1 Veteran user malta eu 343 Posts |
Yeah, money can't get you love, but it sure as hell puts you in a good bargaining position.
THE MOST CRAZY MAGICIAN ON THE MALTESE ISLANDS
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Bill Palmer Eternal Order Only Jonathan Townsend has more than 24312 Posts |
My intro goes like this:
Ladies and gentlemen, our entertainer this evening has toured all over the United States and Europe, bringing his own bizarre brand of comedy and magic to people of all types, from blue collar workers to royalty. He has opened for Louie Anderson, Elton John, Shirley Hemphill, and Harry Blackstone, Jr. He has appaared at Houston's internationally famous Magic Island, ad he played the opening weekends at all three of the Laff Stop Comedy Clubs in the State of Texas. He has appeared in Houston City Magazine, People Magazine and a host of other cheap tabloids you probably thumb through in the checkout line at the supermarket. If he seems familiar to you, perhaps you have seen him when he played the part of Merlin the Magician at the Texas Renaissance Festival. Ladies and Gentlemen ... Bill Palmer!
"The Swatter"
Founder of CODBAMMC My Chickasaw name is "Throws Money at Cups." www.cupsandballsmuseum.com |
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Marvello Inner circle It's amazing how little I can say in 1612 Posts |
Quote:
On 2004-11-11 18:05, cjmagicman wrote: not an intro either... let x = y = 1 basic algebraic statement x = y multiply both sides by x xx = xy subtract both sides by y squared xx-yy = xy - yy factor (x-y)(x+y) = y(x-y) divide both sides by (x-y) x+y = y subtract both sides by y x = 0 replace integer value as stated in first line 1 = 0 this fully allowable equation, following the rule...disproves our number system, if one can equal zero, it could equal any number, therefore one and one equals a brazilian
Never criticize someone else until you have walked a mile in their shoes. Then, when you do criticize them, you will be a mile away from them and you will have their shoes.
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MindMyst New user Connecticut 32 Posts |
Quote:
On 2006-07-20 16:31, Marvello wrote: Hi Marvello, By dividing your equation by (x-y) you are dividing by zero since x=y. This is NOT allowed in the rules of our number system. Hence your conclusion fails by reductio ad absurdum. Math rules! Mindmyst
The Truth Will Set Your Fee
http://mindmyst.blogspot.com/ |
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Marvello Inner circle It's amazing how little I can say in 1612 Posts |
Quote:
On 2006-07-23 10:29, MindMyst wrote: BINGO! Congratulations on discovering what a few of my math teachers failed to see
Never criticize someone else until you have walked a mile in their shoes. Then, when you do criticize them, you will be a mile away from them and you will have their shoes.
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Vibono Magic Special user Växjö,Sweden 647 Posts |
Good evening Ladys and the rest of you, my name is Vibono, but you may call me Master... or God... Your choise
Vibono Mirage
Magic entertainer and Balloon artist |
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Dannydoyle Eternal Order 21219 Posts |
Why do you want to confuse an audience before you even start?
Do an intro with a bad joke, and what are they to expect the rest of the show? Do a professional introduction, be funny when your there. You never get a second chance to make a first impression. Heck you only have 30 seconds to capture their imagination in the first place, why start behind the 8 ball with a silly introduction? Bills is fabulous with one laugh line. Go that route. Make yourself important, then let them find out your funny. The intorduction is to "build you up" build expectation on the part of the audience. Get them going down the "wow is he cool" road. Why give them a chance to not be on board? An intorduction can be the whole show.
Danny Doyle
<BR>Semper Occultus <BR>In a time of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act....George Orwell |
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Lee Darrow V.I.P. Chicago, IL USA 3588 Posts |
For my hypnosis show, we use a variation on the music that the Chicago Bulls use for their opening (but it's copyright free!) and do the following, which IS copyrighted...(written as it's read, the copyrighted version is spelled correctly).
AAAAAAaaaaannnnd NOW <insert name of group> wants to ask YOU - ARE YOU READY TO SLUMMMMBER??? Please welcome, durect from Chicago, Illinois, the Official Hypnotist to Sandals Resorts in the Caribbean, the Man EVERYONE Sleeps for Hypnotist LEEEEEEE Darrow! And we have it recorded, so I don't have to worry about the MC screwing it up, ad libbing it or trying to be "cute" and ignoring it and doing "his own thing" because he's "a professional" and "knows better." Lee Darrow, C.H.
http://www.leedarrow.com
<BR>"Because NICE Matters!" |
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